How long till baby can have occassional "meal" w/o breastmilk/formula?

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JulesDiane

Breastmilk or formula is the primary source of nutrition prior to the age of 1. Before the age of 1, food is for learning. Honestly, I would keep working on the bottle. DD also HATED bottles, but we keep working with her on it, and we have gotten to a place where she will take a bottle. It can still be a bit of a battle, but it has gotten better. Also, you can actually start working on sippy cups (straw or the other kind). You can start practicing with water, and sometimes they will take breastmilk out of a sippy cup over a bottle. My babysitter found the best way to actually get DD to not completely melt down when giving her a bottle was to put her in the bouncy chair, and feed her from behind where she couldn't see her. Just keep trying different things. Good luck!

Sillygirl85

Sorry, you've got a long way to go.

Food before one is only for fun.

You might want to focus on finding a bottle that your LO will take or a sippy cup. Have you tried having different people give her the bottle? Maybe your husband or a grandparent? 

Also in terms of the preference for your bad side. You need to keep offering the other side. I would always offer it first. Maybe try feeding her before she starts screeching that might make her more receptive to something different like a bottle or the other boob.

jnnfrrose6

Can you try to stretch out the 1.5-2 hours between feedings?  At least to maybe 3 hours between to give yourself (and her) a bit of a break.  Have you been trying to give her the bottle, or someone else?  And are you in the room at the time?  I know you said you tried everything, just some thoughts I had.  They say it's harder for a baby to take the bottle initially if you are in the room because they prefer you...I agree with others, though, you've got a long way before milk isn't the main source of nutrition, so hopefully you can find something that works for you.

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mamaHippo23

Please please please do not substitute solid foods in place of breastmilk or formula. EBFing is a huge commitment and I give you a ton of credit for sticking with it. It is hard and I know you are tired, but unless she will take a bottle, there is not alternative nutrition appropriate for infants (besides formula of course).

I'm sorry it's been so rough for you and I hope you can find some relief soon. No matter what happens, she will be weaned eventually so you will not be living like this forever.

 

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JandACoffee:

 I'm thinking we are just going to end up having to do it one of these days after she has started solids, and hopefully she doesn't freak out too badly on whoever is watching her. I guess if the worst thing I do to DD is go out to dinner and movie and leave her with only baby food for 3 or 4 hours then I'm doing all right... I just wish this whole EBF thing were easier. I keep hearing of 3-4 hour intervals between feedings and am amazed at all the possibilities that would open up... Thanks for the replies!

Please do not essentially starve your kid for a few hours so you can go to dinner and a movie. That is incredibly selfish. The bottom line is baby food doesn't replace BM for the first year. If you dd won't take a bottle, you need to suck it up and deal. Yes it sucks not to get time out but being a parent is about making sacrifices.

RoryorHenry?

I agree with all previous posters about breast milk or formula being the primary source of food until one year.

If bottles do not work you may have more luck with a sippy cup as your pedi suggested. Our dd is six months and she is learning how to drink from a cup. You are probably a ways out from that but if your LO continues refusing a bottle than a sippy cup may be an option for offering breast milk or formula as she gets older.

Also, at six months my dd is just starting to stretch out to 3 to 4 hours between feedings. I EBF and feed on demand and I've realized a few times recently the longer durations during feedings.

I went out the other night for dinner at a friends and my husband stayed home with LO. The plan was just to have him text me if she got hungry and I would come straight home. Maybe you could do something similar and go out to eat at a nearby restaurant. Feed right before you leave and then the sitter could just call if your LO gets hungry. Might not be the best idea for a movie but for dinner out the worst case scenario is that you have to pack up your food and rush home.

Sillygirl85

JandACoffee:

SarahW44:

Sorry, you've got a long way to go.

Food before one is only for fun.

You might want to focus on finding a bottle that your LO will take or a sippy cup. Have you tried having different people give her the bottle? Maybe your husband or a grandparent? 

Also in terms of the preference for your bad side. You need to keep offering the other side. I would always offer it first. Maybe try feeding her before she starts screeching that might make her more receptive to something different like a bottle or the other boob.

We've tried multiple bottle types, and different people, and "anonymous" feedings where she can't see anyone, and me being gone, and me being there, and every combination of the above. We've tried when she is really hungry, we've tried when she is not hungry, we've tried about an hour after a feeding so she might be just a little hungry, we've tried multiple times in one day, we've waited a couple days in between tries... we really have tried pretty much everything I can think of. And I never wait till she is completely screeching before I feed her because then she just ends up sucking in a bunch of air and spits up everything she's eaten (I had tried that a long time ago when trying to stretch out feedings). I feed her when she wakes up from her naps usually and then again if she starts fussing and rooting before her next one which is quite frequently which is how it ends up being so many feedings. If I don't feed her right after her naps she gets fussy really fast. I can only get her to eat on the one side in a really weird variation of a football hold or if she is asleep. I'm been working on that one since she was about 6 weeks old when she developed the preference (I think my let down was too fast for her right after her growth spurt, and she just never would take it normally after that no matter what I tried). So in all... I'm out of ideas on all of that. My pedi suggested the sippy cup, and we have started trying to work with her on that already actually even though I know its really early just because we can't really get anything else to work...

I guess I'm just wondering when she can have a meal that is primarily solids becuase I'm thinking its going to come down to that. I'm not talking every day. I know milk is the primary source of nutrition before the age of 1, but I'm hoping she can do that maybe once a month, just so we can actually go out to dinner sometime (and maybe a movie if we are ever so lucky) just the two of us... I know my friend's baby never would take a bottle even with her being in daycare all day and just made up for it by eating a ton in the evenings and at night (reverse cycling I think?) I'm thinking we are just going to end up having to do it one of these days after she has started solids, and hopefully she doesn't freak out too badly on whoever is watching her. I guess if the worst thing I do to DD is go out to dinner and movie and leave her with only baby food for 3 or 4 hours then I'm doing all right... I just wish this whole EBF thing were easier. I keep hearing of 3-4 hour intervals between feedings and am amazed at all the possibilities that would open up... Thanks for the replies!

Just keep trying. She may eventually take the bottle or she may not.

jennygirlmt

I am in the minority but DD does not take bottles dd1 didn't either and I have left her a few times. She wants to nurse every 23 hrs at home but I think that's more bc she likes to comfort nurse. I left her for 4 hours a few times and she was perfectly happy and once I left her for about 6 hours with breastmilk and formula as options and she wouldn't take it. Again she was perfectly happy and content and nursed when I came home. Have you left her for two to three hours at a time? How does she do? If she starts screaming after an hour and a half then you need to stay with her a little longer. Try doing a happy hour. I nurse, then DH and I go to happy hour, have a few drinks and are home in an hour or so. It's refreshing. And you can even do dinner in 1.52 hrs. That's enough for a break. I saw Harry Potter the very last weekend it was out after my first bc I had to wait until she could last long enough, I nursed her at the inlaws then ran out the door : it can always be worse, and it's only temporary. But with two girls who never took bottles I know your pain. It will be over before you know it.

JulySpark05

It took probably over 2 months of trying to give DD the bottle until she took it. The trick with us was to give her formula instead of breastmilk.. no clue why but that's what worked. She was eating every 2 hours and when I weaned and replaced it with formula feeding, she went to eating every 3 hours. Don't lose hope, I can't even remember how many bottles we bought and in the end it wasn't at all about the bottles.

swgal

My girls never had a bottle and we managed fine.  You could go out to dinner for two to three hours and she would be fine.  EBF is a commitment for sure but there are options for a break.  Once she gets to be a bit older she will probably go to bed early and you could do a late dinner and a movie. 

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mandy522

This thread is hilarious. It is not selfish to want to go out with your husband for 2 hours. Yes, parenting is hard and yes, EBF is a commitment, but that does not mean sacrificing your sanity or your relationship with your DH. I agree you should keep trying the bottle (I can't remember now which bottles you have tried, but Tommee Tippee did the trick for us), but my LO would be perfectly happy if I skipped a BF session and gave him solids only for a very occasional meal. Also, by the time LO starts solids, you may be able to try to sippy cup - for some reason, some kids take to a sippy cup of milk better than a bottle.

As for when - that's kind of up to baby. I wouldn't have felt comfortable leaving him with just a solid meal until about 2 weeks ago, but my LO eats 3 solid meals (and good sized meals) already at 7+ months. My best friends LO didn't love solids until about 9 months. I think you have to follow your baby's cues with solids the same way you would for anything else - they will let you know when they want more and when they've had enough.

And one other poster did mention - as baby gets older, they will start going to bed earlier and sleeping longer stretches. My DH and I often wait until we've put LO down at 7:30 to go out for the night.

Also, if it makes you feel any better - this is an interesting article on eating solids and why it is good for baby. Writer is a breastfeeding advocate, but she goes against the grain on BF'ing before 1 is just for fun. I'm not trying to convince you not to BF or anything, it's just some information - take it for what it's worth!

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Oh.

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abbyful

JandACoffee:

DD is atill 4 1/2 months old, but I'm looking into the future a little bit (hopefully). DD is EBF and east every 1.5 - 2 hours during the day and will not take a bottle (at all). We have been trying daily in every possible way we can think of and we can't get her to take it. What that means though is that I can't be away from her for very long without her completely freaking out (she is a red-faced screecher when she is hungry/not happy...). DD developed a bad preference for my side that doesn't have as much milk and so she just eats constantly - I wish it were just a growth spurt but this is her normal... Her pedi isn't concerned about it b/c she has consistently been weghing at the 50th percentile, but needless to say its restrictive. I'm planning on introducing solids around 6 months. I guess I'm wondering how long until she can have solids primarily for a meal? I know in the beginning it is usually just part of a feeding with milk still being primary... It would be really nice if DH and I could go out together alone someday again...

Wow, some of the replies you've received are quite extreme. 

At 6+ months, eating a meal of only solids and skipping the milk a couple times a month of even once a week IS FINE! 

Let's run some numbers, if baby eats: 

30 oz breastmilk and 4 oz solids a day = 900 oz & 120 oz per month, respectively. 88.2% of baby's oz eaten are breastmilk.

Twice a month, replace 4oz of breastmilk with 4oz of food. 87.5% of baby's oz eaten are breastmilk.

LESS THAN 1 PERCENT DIFFERENCE! Not enough to make a difference! 

Call me a bad mom, but last month my LO ate only solids and no milk for *gasp* 2 feedings in a row! It was my SIL's wedding and the first time DH and I had other people around to watch LO, so we both ended up drinking a bit. I hadn't pumped anything, and I follow the rule of thumb "safe to drive, safe to nurse", but I had a few more than I would consider "safe to drive", I wasn't falling down drunk or anything, but I had more than I would allow myself if I was going to be driving somewhere. So LO got solids for a couple feedings. And wouldn't you know it, he's still alive!

[Deleted User]

JFC. I was not implying that going out for 3 hours was going to kill or literally starve your kid, which is why I said "essentially". I just think it's a little selfish to leave your kid when you know she has such an extreme reaction to being away from you (see below).

JandACoffee:

will not take a bottle (at all). 

can't be away from her for very long without her completely freaking out (she is a red-faced screecher when she is hungry/not happy...)

Your title and question was when can baby have a meal without breast milk. Quite a few posters explained to you that BM or formula is the primary nutrition for babies up until a year old, and food before one is just for fun. Maybe I just found it off putting that you feel so strongly about going out with your husband that you are willing to leave your baby for a few hours even though you know she will be red faced and screaming. I get that not having time with your husband is hard. But babies are little for such a short time. Go out to dinner, or don't. Your baby, your life.

Whittyone12

Have you tried spoon feeding her breast milk? That might be an option.

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