September 2013 Moms

Trying so hard... re: holidays

I remember when I used to enjoy holidays! Now I cringe when I think of them. It's so sad! I really feel that my family needs to be MY family for the holidays, not all of this visiting mumbo jumbo. My husband's family expects that we come to every freaking holiday. We only missed one since we have been back which was last Easter because we went out of town. This time we are choosing not to so we can avoid the drama. Big big drama if you haven't been reading my posts. I am so angry right now because even though we are not going to attend tomorrow and have a holiday how I want itjust DH, DD and me, I am still very anxious. I cant tell you how many of his family members have called to tell us that we are making a terrible choice by not coming. Yea... I really planned to have a family so i could sit on the sidelines for the holidays... Whyyyy do people have to ruin the holidays??!!

Anyone else feeling anxiety about tomorrow/holidays?
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Re: Trying so hard... re: holidays

  • A good friend/coworker told me a few years ago to set boundaries now! Dh and I did not have kids and live an hour from my family. I took it upon myself to volunteer us to travel all over for the holidays. Between Christmas Eve and day we would drive 5-6 h
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  • I meant to say to set boundaries now too. It would have been a lot easier to tell them no thank you before having DD. Now everyone plays the 'you are keeping DD from family' game. I just can't seem to get it through their heads!
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  • Me me me!! I so badly want to just have holidays at my own home with my family. Every stinking holiday it's a rush between my family and my inlaws. Plus it never fails that my mom and mil plan dinners at the same time. It's frustrating because I don't wan
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  • Dh and I have decided once we have kids and move they can come to us. Right now we live in the same down as our parents who live 15 mins apart so its convenient. When we lived away we had thanksgiving at our house with everyone and it was fabulous!
  • We told DHs mom we were not planning on doing an extra event with the family to do little kid gift exchanges for Christmas, that it was way too much... She planned it for Christmas Eve and then has a big party at their house again on Christmas day. We t
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  • DH and I don't mind going between IL and my parents for Easter (they live 15 mins from each other). Christmas has been hectic the past few years going between them and going to FIL in NC. Once we found out we will have LO for next Christmas, we decided to
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  • If it makes you feel any better, it could be worse. Both mine and DH's parents are divorced,  so once baby comes we will have four sets of parents fighting for time with LO on the holidays.  Can't wait...
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  • Holidays aren't too terrible because MIL/FIL live across the country (as do BIL/SIL), so we don't have to split major holidays with them. I'm worried that with LO coming, they'll want to do stuff with us for the holidays, and I am very stubborn and don

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  • That sucks - holidays are supposed to be about fun and relaxing, not stressing.  I'm sorry you are so anxious, but I hope you get some time to decompress tomorrow and enjoy YOUR family.

    We actually luck out with family around holidays. 

  • My anxiety is lessened because my aunt isn't coming. My autistic son doesn't like her at all and she just pushes all his buttons and is clueless at why he gets so upset. 

    However it is a sad time of year for me. Easter 2011 we packed our van

    Mom of 5
    Boy 7-11-2007 (has Autism),
    Boy 2-26-2009 to 11-2-11 (had cancer at 4mo),
    Boy 3-28-2011 (has Autism)
    Girl 9-3-2013
    Baby due 2-22-2016
  • Don't even get me started. I mean I get it. They want to see their grandson. But is it really SO ridiculous to want our own traditions? My mom is pushy as shiz. Like its ridiculous. It's her way or she makes passive comments about it for three years. MIL
  • imageAngelMommy11211:
    My anxiety is lessened because my aunt isn't coming. My autistic son doesn't like her at all and she just pushes a
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  • Yep. And for good reason. We did Easter with DH's fam today. His mom made roast beef with cheese whiz. That's all. Nothing else! And everyone got one damn sandwich. Awesome. And then she gave DD a bunch of eggs filled with snacks and candy. And I'm picky


     

      
  • I am with you on this one. It's my husbands side of the family that drives me bananas. My husband's parents are divorced and remarried. When my sister in law is in town we always have big family to do's with everyone. When I say everyone I mean my Husband
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  • imageLuckymomma4:
    I am with you on this one. It's my husbands side of the family that drives me bananas. My husband's parents are divorc
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  • Didn't your sil threaten your life? Why would they think you'd even consider coming?
  • I already set my boundaries for Christmas. They've been set since I got married and moved out. DH and I open a small gift or two at our house BEFORE joining everyone else.

    And when the twins come- if someone wants to spend Christmas Mor

    Eat your food people. You are pregnant, not made of glass. ~PrimRoseMama
    The Benes Boys were born 9/3/13! woooo
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  • I hope you have a great Easter anyway!!!

    Luckily for me, my husband's family is about 3 hours away and they don't expect us to come there. I think we were invited this year, but there is no way I'd want to go there instead of my aunt's like we al

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  • imageawright1983:
    Didn't your sil threaten your life? Why would they think you'd even consider coming?


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  • imageEMLYNNLERETTE:
    But, this has been the BEST Easter ever! DD is the cutest thing in the entire world! It's so much more fun wh
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  • Our parents have finally started making plans to celebrate holidays on different days.  For example: we had Easter dinner at Sunday at my in-laws then went to my parents on Easter day.  Back at Christmas time, we went to one house the Saturda

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