Inlaws interfering

dalzien

DH and I had narrowed our name list down to 2 names, Alexandra and Kiera. After a long discussion we had decided on Alexandra. When our inlaws inquired about our name choices we told them that we narrowed it down to Alexandra from the two. They disagree with the choice and want the name to be Kiera. DH and his sister have names that start with K, and they want to continue that tradition (even though our nephew does not fit with this plan), my MIL also says that Alexandra is too close to his sisters name and it takes away from her. Her name is Kassandra. FIL and MIL also apparently took a poll at work and Kiera won out as the favored name. Hubby's first choice was Kiera and now he wants to go back to that, I however want to stick with Alexandra (a name I prefer). I feel it flows better with the middle name, Linda, that we have chosen. Any advice on how to handle the decision?

PinkLillyLover

I personally prefer Alexandra to Kiera. Your inlaws are definitely over stepping their boundaries. Maybe you and DH should go back to the drawing board. This time do not tell anyone your names!

ETA: I really don't think Linda flows with either name. Sorry!

alphalyrae

This is not an in-law problem. It is a husband problem. You need to sit down with your husband and talk about this. Is he going to let his mommy and daddy dictate all of your future family decisions?

CNJ4EVA

I agree with you that Alexandra flows better with the MN Linda. Good luck to you getting DH back on your side.

KatFCo

Tell your DH it doesn't matter what your MIL's coworkers think, or even what they think. You guys agreed to Alexandra. I think Alexandra and Kassandra flow nicely. It's not fair of him to back out just because other people like another name better.

However, if he reluctantly agreed to Alexandra, maybe he secretly felt like he had to concede to your choice, so you may want to talk about that.

Then you both tell your ILs that you weren't asking for input, you were just informing them of the chosen name.

Zimger

Use the name that you and your DH chose.

I find it odd that your in-laws took a poll at work. I think you should get to name your child just like they were able to name their children.

Spookster

Since when do parents get to choose names for grandchildren without prior arrangment being made? My step-dad and DH pretty much named DD but my step-dad was not pushy or demanding about it. He made a suggestion and we happened to love it. I don't think his parents should feel like they are entitled to name your child. They need a reality check IMO. Tell DH to man up and stick with the choice you BOTH agreed on in the first place FFS, or take it completley back to the drawing board.

Mrs.G123

alphalyrae:

This is not an inlaw problem. It is a husband problem. You need to sit down with your husband and talk about this. Is he going to let his mommy and daddy dictate all of your future family decisions?

This TTM.

ChristyML

dalzien:

DH and I had narrowed our name list down to 2 names, Alexandra and Kiera. After a long discussion we had decided on Alexandra. When our inlaws inquired about our name choices we told them that we narrowed it down to Alexandra from the two. They disagree with the choice and want the name to be Kiera. DH and his sister have names that start with K, and they want to continue that tradition (even though our nephew does not fit with this plan), my MIL also says that Alexandra is too close to his sisters name and it takes away from her. Her name is Kassandra. FIL and MIL also apparently took a poll at work and Kiera won out as the favored name. Hubby's first choice was Kiera and now he wants to go back to that, I however want to stick with Alexandra (a name I prefer). I feel it flows better with the middle name, Linda, that we have chosen. Any advice on how to handle the decision?

I just have to WTH? all of this. Why the crap are your ILs taking polls at work? That is really weird of them. Who cares if they like the other name more? It's really none of their business, until the baby is born, then they can just love the name since it would be chosen for sure.

Sorry your in laws are weirdos.  

g8trkim

If your hubby is reconsidering because that's his personal taste, I can understand. If it's because his family is giving their unwanted 2 cents, that's not okay. I think you two need to sit down and talk it over. Nobody but the two of you should have input on your daughter's name.

kendra223

How do you handle it? You name your kid what you want regardless of your in laws and their polls. This is your child, name her as you wish. They got to name their children. They don't get any input in yours.

FakeFinn

It's none of your inlaws business. Really, what's up with them wanting you to continue their 'tradition'?! This is between you and your husband. It's natural to reconsider names and it's possbile that your husband feels that he chose Alexandra for you, but genuinely prefers Kiera. I'd talk about it with your husband. Perhaps you'll have to go a few steps back and reconsider other names again as well.

cakebatter27

Picking a baby name is up to you and DH only. Unfortunately, people think their opinions matter when they carry no weight. You will need to either get DH back on your side with Alexandra or nix both names and start over. I think if my DH really disliked a name then we would use neither we like and begin again. And this time don't tell anyone until baby is born.

danabsd

Don't ask your inlays for advice. This is YOUR baby. This is YOUR decision. If your inlaws don't like it who cares. Use the name YOU love.

jennyshawn0808

g8trkim:

If your hubby is reconsidering because that's his personal taste, I can understand. If it's because his family is giving their unwanted 2 cents, that's not okay. I think you two need to sit down and talk it over. Nobody but the two of you should have input on your daughter's name.

This!

knitsandgiggles

g8trkim:

If your hubby is reconsidering because that's his personal taste, I can understand. If it's because his family is giving their unwanted 2 cents, that's not okay. I think you two need to sit down and talk it over. Nobody but the two of you should have input on your daughter's name.

 All of this.  At this point, I might try to come up with a third alternative that only you and your husband like. 

EmJ&B

Ouch . . . your inlaws need to back up!

JennyShoo

WTF with their poll?! They need to suck it up, it's not their baby. And you need to grow a pair and stop telling them about your name choices. 

austenfan919

g8trkim:

If your hubby is reconsidering because that's his personal taste, I can understand. If it's because his family is giving their unwanted 2 cents, that's not okay. I think you two need to sit down and talk it over. Nobody but the two of you should have input on your daughter's name.

This.

RedInLove

alphalyrae:

This is not an in-law problem. It is a husband problem. You need to sit down with your husband and talk about this. Is he going to let his mommy and daddy dictate all of your future family decisions?

 

This.

Also, I like both names but definitely prefer Alexandra. It's on my list as well.

An option, if DH seems to not want to come around, might be Alexandria? It could at least address the concern of being so close to SIL's name. Which I don't think it is at all, but it did come to mind as something you could use to still stay away from Kiera.

dalzien

We're going back to the drawing board. He's upset because he was hoping to go with Kiera, but it doesn't sit well with me. We've agreed this is the most diplomatic way to handle it. I'm sad because I really liked the name we had originally settled on, but I'm sure we can find another one. I'm only due in 3 weeks lol.