asked to "help" out with baby shower

CJ086

My Aunt and BFF are hosting my baby shower.  They have thus far asked me to pick the location, one being someone's house the other being a rented venue, pick the date, and come up with the guest list.  I have since found out that the rented venue is a gift from another friend (though I am not supposed to know) so when I suggested going the cheaper route and picking someone's house it was shot down.  I sort of understand why I picked the date as once April gets here my FI and I travel most of the New England area with the race team on the weekends.  I guess I also understand the guest list bit, though now I am concerned about inviting too many people, whom my Aunt and BFF will have to account for with things like the cake, but not inviting enough because of the venue's size.  I thought baby showers were not something to be stressed over by the MTB oh and I have been informed my registry  and guest list need to be completed by this weekend. Any thoughts on this situation?  I am not complaining just kind of at a loss as to my involvement.  I have thrown showers for friends in the past and definitely asked their input but it seems like I took care of a lot more of the decision making.

526SadieSadie

Tell your aunt/BFF that you trust their judgment and whatever they decide will be great, then stop thinking about it.

The venue has nothing to do with the number of guests.  Your nearest and dearest get invited, and you shouldn't add "filler" people to your guest list just because they'll fit.  If your current guest list is too big, they need to wittle it down.

 

Monkeybutt80

with my baby shower, my friends gave me possible dates for me to pick from, which I did.  Then I made the guest list at their request. among my group of friends (4 of us), I am the last one to get pregnant so I was one of the hosts in all three before, and the MTB always set up the guest list.  I just dont see how my friends would figure out who to invite for me?   I listed some of our close local friends, my mother (who wont be there - she lives out of the country), my MIL and my SIL.  all the aunts/ cousins on both sides were left out bc 1) they all live out of town (at least 3 states away), and 2) if they want to, they can always ask my mom or MIL for the shower info (it's not like they dont know I am preggars).  

 

1026pumpkin

It sounds like you have lovely hostesses who are trying to make sure the shower is going to be convenient for you.  I always ask the MTB for preferred dates and a guest list, but it's nice they offered you an opinion on location.

I would just ask them what the ballpark figure is they were planning on for number of guests (or if there is a minimum for the venue) and stay within that.

I wouldn't stress about your registry being complete, and certainly not at the same time the guest list is.  As long as it's mostly ready when the invites get sent out, you're fine.  Most people won't even go shopping until the day before or the day of, anyways.  Just provide your hostesses with the guest list and contact info, and tell them you'll let them know when your registries are done.  Maybe you can let them know what stores you're using in case they want to include the info with the invites. 

EastCoastBride

To follow on the others - find out  how many people your hosts were thinking of.

And past that - it doesn't make sense to me when the MTB isn't consulted about the date and the guest list.  As you're the guest of honor, of course they need to go w/ a date that works for you.

And the guest list... who are they supposed to get it from?  Sure, they can make a good stab at it, but what if they forget people?  Or don't have updated information?  It makes total sense to ask YOU who YOU want invited to this event. 

thisiseverything

My Aunt and cousin are hosting my shower and I've been consulted on a date and guest list - I think this is perfectly normal.  I consulted my hosts about the size to ensure my list isn't too extensive - i.e. family only or a few close friends as well.  

I've now been asked to give some thought to a theme and let them know of anything else I want included in the day.  While I think it is very sweet of them to seek out my opinions, I completely trust them and won't be asserting myself into the planning other than to answer any questions they might have.