Hitting

sportsmomma

Does your LO hit? DS is constantly hitting me, DH or the dog either with his hands or weapons such as his toy bat, shovel, car, whatever. He also pulls my hair. Sometimes it really hurts and he just laughs whenever he does it.

We've been redirecting, explaining why we don't hit people and warning we'll take away the weapon bat or whatever if he does it again and then following through if he does. It seems like the hitting is getti g worse though.

How do you handle it?

Bruton8288

My LO is also doing the same. She hits and laugh about it or she really means it. This may sound crazy but what we have done to show her it's not nice, we started to swift our hand lightly on her face ever time she hits. In no way we are hitting her or harming her by doing this. But, it's getting the point across. She gets upset and stops, than we hug her to show her hugs are better than hitting. Hope this help in anyway.

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MamaToFinley

My DD has been doing this, too. Sometimes it is for play and to get the attention of someone (other kid or adult), other times it is out of frustration. Either way, when I catch it I move her away from whatever she has hit, then I say, "Don't hit." I hold her arms to her torso and count down 3-2-1, then say, "you can play, but don't hit." If she is paying attention to me (and not distracted at this point by something shiny), then I will also follow up with a "Be gentle," and guide her hand to pat, tap, or model whatever appropriate replacement behavior fits the situation. I also sometimes say, "that hurts Mommy/Daddy/other child." Then she toddles away. She gets pretty upset with the brief "time-out," but it seems to have a positive impact. I've noticed her being a little gentler as a result. She just seems to have such a heavy hand and plays so rough sometimes!

I am trying to be vigilant and catch it each time, and I've asked daycare to handle this the same way. I made sure to model it for them so they can see how I do it at home. I didn't want to ask them to do it for me, but really that is the best way for me to see how they do and to merge our styles for consistency. The more often you catch it and apply the same procedure (whatever your procedure may be), the quicker you will extinguish the behavior.

JammieJk

I think you're handling it just fine... consistency is important.  My DS is obsessed with drums and rhythm, so he pats (sometimes rather firmly) anything, my chest, arms, etc.  I just grab his hand and kiss it, and remind him to "be gentle!" 

sportsmomma

Thanks for the advice! I definitely need to speak with his daycare to be sure we're handling consistently. We both use the word gentle, but not sure if we're explaining or redirecting the same way.