Blended Families

I Hate HX's Family

Well, mostly just his biiitch of a sister. She was always awful to me when we were still married, and its only gotten worse now. She is spoiled rotten, lives off her parents, and thinks she is better than everyone she has ever met. She is usually great with my kids however, and has a degree in early childhood development.

This week is school vacation. DS would normally just go to the Y for the week instad of just aftercare. DH pays 100 precent of daycare per our CO and didn't want to pay for the full week. His sister is an Ed Tech and has the week off from school this week too and offered to provide daycare for free so he wouldnt have to pay for the full week at the Y. He asked if I was okay with it, and I agreed because I know he is struggling financially and I know the kids would have a better time with their aunt this week than at daycare. They love their Aunt.

We've had problems before with her saying mean things about me to the kids, so I made it clear to XH that her badmouthing me wouldn't be tolerated and he better make it clear to her. I hate to not allow them time with her because despite my feelings of her the kids really love her.

Today was day one of her watching them. I picked them up and the first thing DS says is "Auntie said if you don't bath me tonight then she's doing it tomorrow cuz my nails are dirty from you not bathing me." And then "I'm wearing new socks from Auntie because the ones you sent me in were obviously too small."

Ughhhh!!! Why can't she just shut her mouth and be happy I'm giving her time with them?! She just always needs to take digs at me through them. My kids are clean, and their clothing fits perfectly fine. She's just a biitch. If I had anywhere else to send them while I work tomorrow I would.

Re: I Hate HX's Family

  • She sounds exactly like my soon to be XSD.

    I have it written into my CO that SD is not allowed to be alone with DD.  I'm lucky.  SD lives no where near us and will likely see DD maybe every few years. And that's being optimistic.

    Still, SD will try to get into her head.

    All I can do is teach my child that kind of behavior is unacceptable and I believe DD will see SD for what she is.

    "he offered her the world. she said she had her own" - poet Monique Duval
  • That sucks. I'm petty but I would take a sick day tomorrow to work on arranging alternate care for the rest of the week. You don't have to deal with that
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  • Ugh. I don't understand why people can't just think about the kids and leave their adult problems out of it. Your XSIL sounds like a peach. Your kids will understand what a b!tch she's being when they're older. Just make sure you're always the bigger person and don't say negative things about her.
  • Have you talked to XH tonight? I would call him. How old is your child?
    Jen - Mom to two December 12 babies Nathaniel 12/12/06 and Addison 12/12/08
  • I'd call your exH, tell him exactly what your DS said and tell him that this is not going to work out. Then inform him your kids will go to the Y for the rest of the week, and he needs to pay for it.
  • imagehopanka:
    I'd call your exH, tell him exactly what your DS said and tell him that this is not going to work out. Then inform him your kids will go to the Y for the rest of the week, and he needs to pay for it.

    Exactly. You warned him, his sister didn't play nice, that's it. No negotiating, just be done with it. Let him deal with having to pay extra money and maybe he'll figure out that his sister is a problem. More than likely though, he'll just blame you. You don't have to tolerate this behavior so go ahead and put a stop to it now.

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  • I called. He said "I'm sorry, I'm so sick of having this conversation with her. I'll talk to her and it won't happen again." Of course I've heard that before.

    I can't get him into the Y for the rest of the week. The full time spots fill fast for the vacation week. Tomorrow is the only other day she will be watching them again this week, Thursday I don't need to go into work until later so ill just wait until XH is home and drop them w him, and theyll be with him until Sunday.

    DD is three next month, DS is 5.

    I just feel helpless because she is always around during their dads time and I know there isn't much I can do to limit contact anyway. She will always be around and she will always be poisonous toward me. XH talks big but I know he probably barely addresses it with her when I call him upset.
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