Another intro and vent

Whales124

Hi ladies! I was active on IF then PAIF for the last year or so. We just had our miracle baby Clare, and it's time to move here to join you if you'll have me!

My IF history is in my siggy, along with a ticker I can't seem to get rid of. My pg was high risk and had more complications then i would have liked. Clare's birth was a bit dicey and I lost a lot if blood. Everything was worth it because now our precious girl is here.

Okay now for my issue. After spending the last few weeks working very hard at BF I was told today I needed to stop and do formula. C wouldnt latch for a week and a half, we finally overcame that hurdle and have now hit a wall. My supply is crap because my blood counts are so low. I'm still gonna pump, but will mostly need to use formula. At first I felt free, but now I'm sad, not to mention my hormones are wacky. I guess after feeling like my body almost failed her during my pg I now feel like it's failing her again. Ugh, things are tough, KWIM? No one could ever have prepared me for the obstacles we'd encounter along the way.

Okay sorry more of a vent then an intro! Looking forward to reconnecting with familiar ladies and meeting new ones! Thanks for letting me get it all out!

TJ1979

Congrats and welcome! I'm sorry for the rough time you have had. But go easy on yourself about the breastfeeding. Keep letting LO latch and pump and feed what you can while supping with formula. Hopefully your body will get back on track soon and you can go back to BFing. And if not, there is nothing wrong with formula. The important thing is that you are both healthy. Enjoy your sweet miracle. They grow so fast!

IBackBevo

I know how you feel.  I had pre-e and my LO developed IUGR.  I was on bedrest (even hospital bedrest) for the later part of my pregnancy and I was very high risk. I only left the house the last month to go to my MFM and my OB for ultrasounds and NST's.  At one point they thought they were going to have to take him at 34 weeks and he was not even measuring 4 lbs.   I ended up having to have c-section after LO failed an NST at 37 weeks--the cord was wrapped around his neck twice.  The totality of the experience was so stressful and made for a not enjoyable pregnancy.

LO was only 5.1 lbs and went down to 4.75.  He was too small and weak too latch or BF.  Plus, it took a week for my milk to come in and my supply wasn't great when it did.  I had to exclusively pump from the get go and supplement with preemie formula.  I killed myself pumping.  Tried everything under the sun - frequent pumping, fenugreek, Reglan, Domperidone.  (And please take my advice when I say do not take Reglan or Domperidone - totally not worth it.)  A good day was getting to 10-15 ounces.  I would even pump in the middle of the night - I would be up 2 hours at a time between feeding him and pumping and would barely get back to sleep before I had to get up again.  Finally, at 2 months LO was pulled off of BM for a milk protein allergy and put on Alimentum. 

Honestly, my life got so much better after that.  Now I look back on it and I don't even know why I stressed myself out about it.  LO is doing great on formula!  He is now almost 15 lbs!   After my experience, I have sworn that if I ever have another LO, I am not doing this again. I will try, but if it is even half this much trouble, I will give it up because there was no reason to have gone to the extremes I went through or to have put myself through so much stress.  LO has been STTN since 3 months and I have truly been able to ENJOY my baby instead of being miserable.

Robeano

First off welcome!

Secondly sorry you have to stop breast feeding. I had some troubles getting started with breast feeding, I totally understand the frustration. Good luck with pumping!

lovebug33

Congrats and Welcome! I hope the bf thing works out soon!

ELF4321

Welcome! I'm sorry about your BFing issues. I never got a milk supply at all and have been ff since day 4. I struggled with it a lot emotionally, but here we are nine months later and my daughter is happy and healthy. Spending time with your LO is the important thing!

Mrs.AmyDylan

Whales, so good to see you! Congrats on Clare!

Have you had Clare assessed for a tongue tie? Robeano, 4legs, and my sweet baby J all have/had problems breast feeding of varying degrees that came back to the tongue tie.

I didn't have a supply problem because I started pumping the day my milk came in because DD wouldn't latch at all. That being said, you can still fix this if you really want to bf.  Find a good lactation consultant that will help you get your supply up and get her tongue evaluated (you may need to find a specialist because not all docs do the eval and procedure - call your pedi and ask how to have her evaluated).

Hugs to you! Ps - to get rid of your ticket/change your siggy, open two windows with the bump. Edit your siggy in one and save, then refresh a post that has your siggy in the other. Something is screwy with the bump on the siggy editing.  

eponine7682

Good to see you Whales! I too had to supplement since day 2 because LO was teeny and my supply wasn't great. I have had supply issues since which was really disappointing because her latch was awesome. Anyhow long story short I pumped for a while and exhausted myself and finally decided it wasn't worth all the work and frustration to get maybe an ounce if I was lucky per pumping session so I stopped a few days ago. LO has always been fine on formula...I was FF and turned out fine. Don't worry about it and do what is best for your family and for your sanity...whether that means doing all you can to try to BF or to just ditch it and go to formula.

amandaleigh1

Welcome! I am sorry your pregnancy and delivery was so rough. I am another failed BFer here. I cried about it a lot. It gets better. Whatever you end up doing, your LO thrives on food and love. Our LOs thrive on formula or BM or a combo. Just find the mix that works best for your sanity and gives you the best chance at spending quality time with your LO.

Ruthie04

Welcome and congrats! I'm so sorry for all of the BFing frustration. I have had many moments of feeling like my body was letting them down. We had serious issues as well (late term preemies, IUGR, crappy latches) and my supply tanked. I now pump and add the milk to their formula bottles. I once read an abstract that said the positive effects of breastmilk are seen after as little as 50ml/ day. Everytime, I get down on myself, I just try to remember that little number. You are doing the best you can and that's exactly what she needs. Great job, Mom!

pb_bride

Whales, welcome and congrats on the birth of baby Clare!  Sending you some hugs - the first weeks are so tough.  You are doing the best you can, so don't be too hard on yourself.  I think many of us here have had the same "failure" feelings, but you need to remind yourself that you are NOT  a failure.  You are providing loving care to your DD, and that is the most important thing!  There's nothing wrong with supplementing.  You need to take care of yourself and let your body heal, make sure you are eating enough and drinking plenty. Once your body recovers, I bet your milk production will improve.  Hang in there!

yodasmistress

The best way to get your supply up is to just keep putting the kiddo to the breast.  Not saying you shouldn't supplement with formula if the baby's calorie needs aren't being met but there is no reason you have to stop trying to BF.