How the heck am I going to raise a girl?

EMF70

I grew up with 2 younger brothers and have more childhood memories of playing with G.I. Joe action figures, Superheroes, Star Wars, dirt bikes, and Transformers than anything else.  I love Superhero and Science Fiction movies.  In other words, I'm not girly AT ALL.  I rarely wear makeup and have always preferred pants to dress.   I remember building things with my dad and even had my own hammer at 5. I have absolutely no idea what to do with a girl.  I always intended to raise my child in a very gender neutral environment but what if the girl turns out that she likes to be girly? 

valstulas

It's okay. You'll just learn as you go. I have 3 boys and I was a girly girl. As they grow, you just learn more about what they like. Who knows? Maybe she'll be a rough and tumble tomboy like her mommy.

bobcee

It'll be fine I promise.  I was a tom boy too.  Have two brothers, all boy cousins, am way more into sports than my husband and a lot of other guys, also rarely wear make up and am an electrical engineer which is a predominantly male field. 

I have a daughter and love her more than anything.  Sometimes she likes playing with dirt, rocks, or blocks, but other times she wants to play with her dolls and wear skirts and dresses.  She'll find things she likes, you'll learn along the way and you'll love her and accept her.  I don't know if I'm explaining it well, but every kid will find there own way and if she's girly so be it.

melissabshelton

I'm not girly and have 2 daughters.  They have their Barbies and baby dolls.  Right beside their Hot Wheels, tool sets, footballs, and all that.  In the middle of my living room floor at this moment is a hot pink toy kitchen, the big Tonka dump truck, BMW motorcycle riding toy, pink Mega Blocks castle, a few Water Babies...  They have their pretty dresses and fancy tutus for their girly occasions but mostly live in jeans.  We watch our princess movies and then turn around and watch our Star Wars.  My 2 year old loves football and my 6 year old loves hockey but both want to do ballet.  We do the Lowe's Build And Grow clinics with them, they help my husband fix stuff around the house and work on the cars.  Personally, this is what I love best about my girls.  With how we've raised them we've never told them they couldn't do something because it was for boys.  And honestly, they figured out their super girly moments all on their own.

 

I'm not really sure any of that makes any sense now that I've typed it out. 

pepomntpat

I don't know. I just play with her, talk to her, read her books and feed her. So far, so good.  She does like pink an awful lot, but other than that she's not very girly-at least not yet.

EMF70

Thanks for the encouragement.  I'm a little less freaked out now.  The best I can do is let her be who she wants to be and encourage her like my parents encouraged me.

JCWhitey

Haha, I'm going to think the exact same thing if this one turns out to be a girl!  Oddly, my mom was a big girlie girl and I turned out to be a tomboy despite her best efforts at getting me to be girly.  To this day she questions how I turned out I did.  I'd say just let her do her thing (to a point, obviously).  Or else you'll get a little rebel like me who cried whenever you try to put a dress on her and make your life miserable.   

PrimRoseMama

I was wondering when we would get our first sex disappointment thread...

OP, you'll be fine. No where in the contract of motherhood does it say you have to like pink and frills to birth/raise a baby with a vagina. Feed, clothe and get to know the kid. You'll make it work.

She could turn out to be a huge fan of transformers and GI Joe. You don't know and that's half the fun.

ellewoodsSC

It's funny, but I don't think you should worry at all.  Have you seen how many cute things there are for girls and everybody ooh and aahs over them like there's no tomorrow!  Actually I am not very girly at all and I love having a girl.  She's gentle and sweet and actually really likes to accessorize with hair bows, bangles and scarves with no input from me.  She loves playing with my jewelry!   There's no telling where she gets that from, but it's the cutest thing ever.  Our children are independent little people no matter what our experiences and preferences may be.  I think I find myself adapting more to her than the other way around.  Don't worry, you'll be a great mom!     

StarshineR

Moms don't have to be just like their daughters in order to be good Moms. My Mom is very much a girl-girl - and I am more like you. We don't have a terrible relationship, and I turned out fine. I used to play with both boys and girls growing up - so, I just always danced to the beat of my own drum. 

You're still a girl, despite your interests. You may find that you have more in common with your daughter than you expect.  IMO, GI Joes and Transformers *are* dolls in drag. Just never tell a boy that. lol. 

If your daughter prefers "girly-girl" things, then you'll just buy them those things for birthdays and christmases, and you'll pretend to enjoy play tea parties and dressing up barbie. It's not really a big deal. Parents adjust and learn. If my Mom could, so could you.