So I'm a FTM and a lot of my friends and coworkers are telling me " oh I have (this (insert baby gear) you can have." Now I am very grateful for their offers and am gonna take up some offers (IE: borrow bassinet from best friend) but other things I prefer to buy new. I've been very nicely just saying "oh thank you so much " but I'm looking for some nice ways to say thanks, but no thanks without sounding ungrateful. Any tips?? TIA
Re: Loaned baby stuff
The only tip I can give you is to take everything anyone will give you.
We were thrilled as punch to get almost all of DD's clothes for free, since I have a niece who is only a few years older. The idea that you need to buy everything new for your baby is absurd. My mom got most of what we use at her house at garage sales. We just cleaned it with rubbing alcohol and then cleaned it again with a vinegar solution and good as new!
The only thing I would exclude would be car seat, crib and mattress.
As far as advice for when you don't want something, just say thank you but we've already got that particular item.
Just tell them you already have a certain "whatever it is" in mind, but thanks for the offer. DH's aunt kept trying to give us her 25 year old extremely ugly bassinet, but I already had a PnP with a bassinet, so I told her thanks but we've got it covered.
Really though, the only things I wanted new were my car seat, crib/mattress- and breast pump (but I wound up buying a used hospital grade). If someone had a baby recently and wanted to loan me their infant car seat, I would have taken them up on it. The only ones that were offered to me were expired- by people who insisted that they were fine and thought it was dumb to think they expired...
Sometimes the "I have a particular 'whatever' in mind..." can offend the sensitive / easily offended. I went with - my really close friend had a baby a year ago so I have "whatever they were offering I preferred to buy new" already - but thank you!!"
Never hurt anyone's feeling and they didn't feel like i was putting down their stuff.
100 % agree!
Well It is VERY nice they are offering this will be my 3rd LO and I am taking everything my SIL and friends have offered and buying anything left I need either new or used. I can tell you sometimes its suck a waste of money store seriously OVERCHARGE for items that will only get used for 2-3 months tops.
BUT since you are a FTM and maybe planing on more children down the line you will get more use of of things my suggestion is to take what ever they give you with in reason and save your money as a mom of 2 already TRUST me cash is needed more then a brand new changing table.
What is it that you're turning down?
I'd take whatever you can get. Baby crap is expensive and they use it for such a short period of time. For most items it's pretty silly to go out and buy brand new stuff. Short of the crib and my breast pump all of DD's baby stuff is currently out on loan... and has been loaned to other people prior to this.
DD2 8.22.13
MMC 1.4.17 at 16w
Expecting #3, EDD 1.29.18