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Blended Families
And frustration hits.... again!!!
Am I the only one who asks her self what the hey did I get my self into. Am I strong enough to put up with this drama. Am I good enough to parent two children one of who isn't mine and will realize that once she grows up. The person who has never disliked someone so much. Not because she had a child with him but because she is soooo selfish. Because to her, her boyfriends needs are much more important than her own child. The fact that my husband wont stand up to the witch to save his soul and basically runs him. Who has to stand up for her self when her husband will not. When all I have done is be there for the little girl and treat her as if she were mine... How do any of you handle this and work with it. Im so scared i will not be strong enough and want the easy way out. I pray to god that he gives me the strength with everyone involved. Phewww RANT OVER.
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Re: And frustration hits.... again!!!
T&P's!!!!!!!!!!!
You are not the only one who asks themselves that, you are MORE than strong enough to deal with this drama. You are a wonderful parent to all your children. Please don't question that. Ongoing drama takes it's toll and makes you question yourself. Being a SM can be a horrid, horrid position, but the best way to deal is to be the best parent you can.
My DH and I had a lllloooonnggg talk after my last freak out. His ExW is being really, really challenging in everything and I was feeling as if was doing everything. I finally said if he wasn't going to try, I wasn't going to anymore. DH was walked all over by his ExW, mother to his DD 8 yrs old and was ever since they met. If he wasn't going to stand up for himself and his DD, I wasn't going to do it anymore. It was effecting our marriage and our health.
He's all out in force now. I'm soooo happy I finally said something. I can't make anything happen, only he can with his lawyer.
I am right there with you. I posted a while ago that I wish someone had told me being a step parent was like being kicked in the face everyday. You pour your heart and soul into these little beings who didn't come from you and your reward is to be told "you're not my mom" or "you're not really part of our family." You want to scream at their "mother" that she should get on the ground daily and thank the lord that these children are hers because they will never stop loving her, but you, eh, you can be tossed to the side like garbage because you didn't let them play video games after school. And then, when they do go visit their mother, you worry constantly about what they are doing, what they are eating, who they are around, because "mom" lives in a two bedroom trailer with 2 other guys and does homemade tattoos. You ask your husband to step up and set some rules but he is so afraid of confrontation all you can do is clean up the mess when they come back home. It sucks. But, I do take comfort in knowing that when they grow up - the fact that they are semi-normal human beings who know right from wrong and can take care of themselves - I did that. I put a broken boy back together and though I may not have a statue erected in my name, when I see him smile and hear about how he is thriving in school, I know I was put here for reason.
Did you read my diary?!?! LOL! I think all Steps feel this way! And knowing that "one day" the SKs will realize what we did for them, doesn't always help today.