Those with more than one child, jealousy issues?

Naz91804

How did your second child handle being a big sis/bro?  My SIL has 4-year-old and 6-month-old girls and the 4-year-old is super jealous of all the attention the baby is getting and has been acting up.  They were staying with us this weekend and she was crying, whining, yelling or throwing temper tantrums the whole time.  She was kinda spoiled to begin with, her dad doesn't know how to say no, so I'm not surprised that she misses all the attention, but how do you fix the problem now?  The parents are so frustrated and don't know what to do.  Any suggestions?

Mama_v2.0

She has to make sure that the 4 year old gets her 1:1 time when the 6 month old is sleeping or playing on her own (in a jumperoo or whatever). Make sure the 4 year is involved in caring for and playing with the 6 month old. Try to use positive enforcement, "I like how gentle you are being with your sister." " Thank you for sharing with your sister." The 4 year old should be helping mom and getting special praise for that. Simple things like throw away trash, put dishes on the counter, getting a pair of socks. Make sure the 4 year old gets at least 30 minutes of cuddle time day (though I would try for more like an hour...could be broken up into two, singing, reading, or just cuddling and talking before going to sleep.)

With a 4 year old it is going to be a lot harder than dealing with a 2 year old (like I do.) My niece and nephews are spaced 4 years and it is very rough for them (also helps that the mother doesn't focus on the older ones unless they are in trouble for something, only reinforcing the negative.)

Celyn

Siblings without Rivalry is a good book to suggest