DH and I have been planning on TTC in March 2013. I had a miscarriage back in April and really want another child. After doing some more thinking about it, I think it is in our best interest to wait for an extra year or so for several reasons.
First, it would give us more time to save some money. I also want to try and lose some more weight before we get pregnant. I still have about 10 lbs on me from DS. I also start accuring an extra 4 hours of leave a month in November, because I hit my 5 year anniversary.
My heart says to go ahead with our previous plans, because I really do want to have another baby. Plus, they say if you wait to get pregnant when you are ready, it will never happen. But my brain is telling me to wait.
I know you ladies can't tell me how to live my life, just want to hear your opinions and what you would do in my situation. TIA!!!
Re: What would you ladies do?
I'm sorry for your loss.
When does your husband think the best time to start is? His opinion matters way more than ours.
How much leave do you have saved up? 4 extra hours a month really isn't much to wait on, IMO.
I don't have much leave. I think it's just the combination of money, leave and getting in better shape. DH wants another baby also, but I think he will ultimately do whatever I would like. We haven't made a firm decision. 4 hours doesn't seem like much, but over the year we wait and the time I carry, it's about 100 hours. With DS, half of my leave was not paid, so we really want to try and avoid that this time around.
"They" also say putting your hands above your head during pregnancy will cause the baby's umbilical cord to wrap around its neck. Plus, ''They'' are firm believers that any and all alleged conspiracies they hear over the internet are true (George W Bush is an alien, etc).
IMHO, I think you should wait, an extra 12 months really isn't that long of a time. You'd then have the extra hours to stay at home with your newborn if you so chose, and the extra money is really helpful even in the non-baby-related expenses.
I would give some serious thought to what kind of family i had envisioned. Money aside (because really you are talking about waiting a year for about 2 extra weeks of leave), had you hoped to have your children grow up close in age to one another?
If your gut is telling you to wait another year to have things lined up so you are stress-free, then do it. If you are simply scared to try again and open yourself up to potential heart-break, then that won't change in a year.
Why not try to lose the 10 pounds first and if you manage to do it in a few months and you're feeling great about TTC then NTNP for awhile. You can make a plan to go for it in a year, but just remember that things might not necessarily happen 'right away' then. It might take time from that point on, leaving your siblings even further apart in age if that's a concern for you and DH.