FFFC

tsharon · December 2012

lovelyday39:
tsharon:
Grace0609:
SpringPeeper:

I fail to see how other people's misfortunes means that I am not allowed to complain about being uncomfortable or whine about some other TMI pregnancy side effects. I'm not going to complain directly TO you, but I don't have to love every minute.

Don't you dare complain about not liking your dinner because some people don't get enough to eat!

I WILL complain about feeling like #$I* for 9 months. It doesn't make me any less grateful to have this baby.
Well you just go for it. What a lucky thing to be able to whine about.
tsharon- I think it's really sucky of you to try and make other people feel bad/guilty when they are having a hard time w/pregnancy and want to talk about it on a pregnancy board.

I'm not. When have I EVER before jumped on someone for complaining about their pregnancies? Especially people having a hard time? I haven't. I'm talking about whiny people.

mrskumie · December 2012

rayofsunshine99:
My confession: (basically what I said in the baking thread) I hate it when people bake/give me cookies during the holidays. There are enough sweets around tempting me at work, and I don't buy cookies and sh!t to keep in the house because I know I will eat them all so when someone bakes & gives them to me, I wish they hadn't and sometimes throw them away. I realize that may seem mean or inconsiderate and people took the time to bake but I think people also do it because THEY enjoy it and need to consider that not everyone appreciates/wants a sh!tton of cookies in their house.

OMG THIS! I'm a teacher and while it is super sweet that the parents baked stuff and brought it to me for Christmas, when each of my children do it, that means I get POUNDS of cookies and sweets that there is no way I can eat them all!

rayofsunshine99 · December 2012

tsharon:
Bink720:
rayofsunshine99:
Re: complaining.... When I was pregnant with DS (it was unplanned) and I complained a lot about all the discomforts of being pregnant. This pregnancy was very much planned for and we lost two babies during the 14 months we were trying. There are times that I get frustrated about something and think to complain and then I think about my friends who are struggling/unable to get pregnant and how they would give anything to have heartburn, sleepless nights or have people telling them that they look 'way farther along than they are'. (something I just complained about the other day) I try to keep voicing these complaints to a minimum, and even more so, when I'm feeling frustrated or annoyed by a pregnancy related thing, it helps to "check myself" and remember how lucky I am. Suddenly the thing(s) I was irritated about don't really seem like a big deal.
I'm totally with you on the feeling grateful and remembering that I'm really lucky. On the flip side, I think you need to know your audience. I would never call one of my friends that is TTC or is struggling with IF and complain. I don't even bring up my pregnancy unless they ask. But coming onto a pregnancy board and saying you are sick of hearing people complain about being pregnant. This is where we are supposed to complain and commiserate. I do it here so I don't feel the need to put it on people IRL. I think if someone doesn't want to hear people b!tch about being pregnant, they shouldn't spend so much time on a pregnancy board. I don't think it's very fair to go to a pregnancy board and make women feel bad for talking about what they are going through.
Hahaha, yeah. I totally don't belong here. I get it. You're a real peach, aren't you? Keep whining about how miserable you are. It only makes you look stupid. And don't "hint" again that I shouldn't spend so much time on this board. I've earned my right to be here. I've supported these ladies, been excited for these ladies, commiserated with these ladies...I've been a part of their journey, as they have been mine. So suck it.

Woah tsharon - Bink has been very diplomatic about her responses and has not said anything in a mean or malicious way. She has acknowledged aspects of your POV while also providing an alternative POV from her/our aspect as well, for you to consider and perhaps respect?

Telling someone to "Suck it" or saying that she implied you don't belong here etc... is not cool at all.

tsharon · December 2012

kelsea1031:
tsharon:
JSS1002:
Telling somebody how you feel (physically or otherwise) is not necessarily complaining, as much as it sometimes is just stating a fact. Like, if somebody asks me how I feel, or how I'm doing, I'm going to TELL them, but it doesn't mean I'm complaining, I'm just answering a question.

The inability to recognize this bothers me.

That's different. Even those of us not carrying can see that there are things that happen that can't be much fun. It's not the talking about it, it's the people that whine.
This is a pregnancy board and if women want to whine about the not-so-joyous parts of pregnancy, so be it. If we follow this line of thinking then no one should be allowed to complain about their jobs because there are some women on this board who are un/underemployed. No one should be allowed to whine/vent about their H's because there are single moms on the board. And so on and so on.
Tsharon, you said in your response to my post that I was not the type of person you were talking about. But in your original post, you never specified, you just said pregnant women should "frankly, shut up and enjoy it."

And I'm gonna have to agree with you on that. I didn't specify, and I should have. My post was too broad, and I should have clarified what I meant. I actually enjoy hearing about pregnancy, all of it, and what you're going through. I always hate to hear when one of you is suffering, or miserable, or having a hard time. I love to hear when you feel a kick, a movement, or a hiccup. All of it is part of the experience, and I should have clarified what I meant.

Here it is: I'm tired of WHINY women who do nothing but WHINE about pregnancy. And there ARE some of them here.

tsharon · December 2012

Bink720:
tsharon:
Grace0609:
SpringPeeper:
I fail to see how other people's misfortunes means that I am not allowed to complain about being uncomfortable or whine about some other TMI pregnancy side effects. I'm not going to complain directly TO you, but I don't have to love every minute.
Don't you dare complain about not liking your dinner because some people don't get enough to eat!
I WILL complain about feeling like #$I* for 9 months. It doesn't make me any less grateful to have this baby.
Well you just go for it. What a lucky thing to be able to whine about.

This disgusts me. The fact that you are coming here and making people feel bad about talking about their pregnancy on a pregnancy board is horrible. And not only that, but you go after Grace. Who is possibly the most supportive person on this entire board. You should feel bad.

tsharon:
Bink720:
rayofsunshine99:
Re: complaining.... When I was pregnant with DS (it was unplanned) and I complained a lot about all the discomforts of being pregnant. This pregnancy was very much planned for and we lost two babies during the 14 months we were trying. There are times that I get frustrated about something and think to complain and then I think about my friends who are struggling/unable to get pregnant and how they would give anything to have heartburn, sleepless nights or have people telling them that they look 'way farther along than they are'. (something I just complained about the other day) I try to keep voicing these complaints to a minimum, and even more so, when I'm feeling frustrated or annoyed by a pregnancy related thing, it helps to "check myself" and remember how lucky I am. Suddenly the thing(s) I was irritated about don't really seem like a big deal.
I'm totally with you on the feeling grateful and remembering that I'm really lucky. On the flip side, I think you need to know your audience. I would never call one of my friends that is TTC or is struggling with IF and complain. I don't even bring up my pregnancy unless they ask. But coming onto a pregnancy board and saying you are sick of hearing people complain about being pregnant. This is where we are supposed to complain and commiserate. I do it here so I don't feel the need to put it on people IRL. I think if someone doesn't want to hear people b!tch about being pregnant, they shouldn't spend so much time on a pregnancy board. I don't think it's very fair to go to a pregnancy board and make women feel bad for talking about what they are going through.
Hahaha, yeah. I totally don't belong here. I get it. You're a real peach, aren't you? Keep whining about how miserable you are. It only makes you look stupid. And don't "hint" again that I shouldn't spend so much time on this board. I've earned my right to be here. I've supported these ladies, been excited for these ladies, commiserated with these ladies...I've been a part of their journey, as they have been mine. So suck it.
You should really read entire threads before you go and choose to respond to each one individually. If you had bothered to read my follow up I said you were already a member of the community, but that sensitivity goes both ways. I don't know what has happened to you today to make you think it's ok to treat everybody this way, but it's not. I spent a lot of time forming my responses, because I didn't want to offend you or anyone else on this board who may be in a similar situation. I shouldn't have wasted my time. This tantrum you are throwing, trying to make everyone feel bad isn't ok. And the only person it is a reflection on is you.

Well if I read it wrong, then I'm sorry. But to quote you..."I think if someone doesn't want to hear people b!tch about being pregnant, they shouldn't spend so much time on a pregnancy board."

That sounded a lot to me like, basically, I should stay away from here if I don't agree with every complaint you guys have.

tsharon · December 2012

rayofsunshine99:
tsharon:
Bink720:
rayofsunshine99:
Re: complaining.... When I was pregnant with DS (it was unplanned) and I complained a lot about all the discomforts of being pregnant. This pregnancy was very much planned for and we lost two babies during the 14 months we were trying. There are times that I get frustrated about something and think to complain and then I think about my friends who are struggling/unable to get pregnant and how they would give anything to have heartburn, sleepless nights or have people telling them that they look 'way farther along than they are'. (something I just complained about the other day) I try to keep voicing these complaints to a minimum, and even more so, when I'm feeling frustrated or annoyed by a pregnancy related thing, it helps to "check myself" and remember how lucky I am. Suddenly the thing(s) I was irritated about don't really seem like a big deal.
I'm totally with you on the feeling grateful and remembering that I'm really lucky. On the flip side, I think you need to know your audience. I would never call one of my friends that is TTC or is struggling with IF and complain. I don't even bring up my pregnancy unless they ask. But coming onto a pregnancy board and saying you are sick of hearing people complain about being pregnant. This is where we are supposed to complain and commiserate. I do it here so I don't feel the need to put it on people IRL. I think if someone doesn't want to hear people b!tch about being pregnant, they shouldn't spend so much time on a pregnancy board. I don't think it's very fair to go to a pregnancy board and make women feel bad for talking about what they are going through.
Hahaha, yeah. I totally don't belong here. I get it. You're a real peach, aren't you? Keep whining about how miserable you are. It only makes you look stupid. And don't "hint" again that I shouldn't spend so much time on this board. I've earned my right to be here. I've supported these ladies, been excited for these ladies, commiserated with these ladies...I've been a part of their journey, as they have been mine. So suck it.
Woah tsharon - Bink has been very diplomatic about her responses and has not said anything in a mean or malicious way. She has acknowledged aspects of your POV while also providing an alternative POV from her/our aspect as well, for you to consider and perhaps respect?
Telling someone to "Suck it" or saying that she implied you don't belong here etc... is not cool at all.

Telling her to suck it was a reaction to her basically saying that I shouldn't come here if I didn't like every single thing that is said. I did NOT think it was very diplomatic. And she basically DID imply that I shouldn't be here if I didn't like it every time someone whined. That's not really fair, is it? I don't have to like everything everyone says. I'm allowed to have an opinion and STILL be part of this board. Just like women who whine about their pregnancies. They are allowed to whine, and I'm allowed to think it's stupid. I have already explained that I think there's a big, BIG difference between most of the women here and the whiners.

tsharon · December 2012

SpringPeeper:
tsharon:
SpringPeeper:
I fail to see how other people's misfortunes means that I am not allowed to complain about being uncomfortable or whine about some other TMI pregnancy side effects. I'm not going to complain directly TO you, but I don't have to love every minute.
Don't you dare complain about not liking your dinner because some people don't get enough to eat!
I really don't see how those two things are even REMOTELY comparable.
ok fine. How would you feel if someone that was childless not by choice told you to just shut up and enjoy the fact that you are getting a baby instead of whining about pregnant women whining?
More comparable?

I would think that's a stupid thing to say, frankly. Apples and oranges. But if I was whining about the process of GETTING a baby, then it would be fair to tell me to shut up and enjoy the fact that I'm, indeed, getting a baby, no matter how hard the process is. Have I whined about the fact that I'm having to do a home study? Justify my beliefs? Produce mounds of paperwork and certificates and blah, blah, blah? Have I whined about the doctor's visits, the tests, the lawyers, the expenses? Have I whined about ANY of that?

Not.Even.Once.

I have to do a hundred things you ladies don't have to do just to have the same right to be a parent that you automatically have. And I'm not whining even a little, because the end result is that I GET A BABY! Yeah, I'd expect you to tell me to shut up if I whined about that.

And again, I'm NOT talking about the general complaints, or the rough pregnancies, or the scary situations. Heck, I'm not even talking about the women who come on here and say "I am SO sick and tired of being sick and tired!" I would be too, I'm sure! I'm talking about the WHINERS. Y'all all know there are some here.

rayofsunshine99 · December 2012

tsharon:
rayofsunshine99:
tsharon:
Bink720:
rayofsunshine99:
Re: complaining.... When I was pregnant with DS (it was unplanned) and I complained a lot about all the discomforts of being pregnant. This pregnancy was very much planned for and we lost two babies during the 14 months we were trying. There are times that I get frustrated about something and think to complain and then I think about my friends who are struggling/unable to get pregnant and how they would give anything to have heartburn, sleepless nights or have people telling them that they look 'way farther along than they are'. (something I just complained about the other day) I try to keep voicing these complaints to a minimum, and even more so, when I'm feeling frustrated or annoyed by a pregnancy related thing, it helps to "check myself" and remember how lucky I am. Suddenly the thing(s) I was irritated about don't really seem like a big deal.
I'm totally with you on the feeling grateful and remembering that I'm really lucky. On the flip side, I think you need to know your audience. I would never call one of my friends that is TTC or is struggling with IF and complain. I don't even bring up my pregnancy unless they ask. But coming onto a pregnancy board and saying you are sick of hearing people complain about being pregnant. This is where we are supposed to complain and commiserate. I do it here so I don't feel the need to put it on people IRL. I think if someone doesn't want to hear people b!tch about being pregnant, they shouldn't spend so much time on a pregnancy board. I don't think it's very fair to go to a pregnancy board and make women feel bad for talking about what they are going through.
Hahaha, yeah. I totally don't belong here. I get it. You're a real peach, aren't you? Keep whining about how miserable you are. It only makes you look stupid. And don't "hint" again that I shouldn't spend so much time on this board. I've earned my right to be here. I've supported these ladies, been excited for these ladies, commiserated with these ladies...I've been a part of their journey, as they have been mine. So suck it.
Woah tsharon - Bink has been very diplomatic about her responses and has not said anything in a mean or malicious way. She has acknowledged aspects of your POV while also providing an alternative POV from her/our aspect as well, for you to consider and perhaps respect?
Telling someone to "Suck it" or saying that she implied you don't belong here etc... is not cool at all.
Telling her to suck it was a reaction to her basically saying that I shouldn't come here if I didn't like every single thing that is said. I did NOT think it was very diplomatic. And she basically DID imply that I shouldn't be here if I didn't like it every time someone whined. That's not really fair, is it? I don't have to like everything everyone says. I'm allowed to have an opinion and STILL be part of this board. Just like women who whine about their pregnancies. They are allowed to whine, and I'm allowed to think it's stupid. I have already explained that I think there's a big, BIG difference between most of the women here and the whiners.

She didn't "basically say you shouldn't come here if she didn't like every single thing that she said". That may have been your interpretation of it, but it was not what she said. To quote, "But coming onto a pregnancy board and saying you are sick of hearing people complain about being pregnant. This is where we are supposed to complain and commiserate. I do it here so I don't feel the need to put it on people IRL." Take those sentences for what they say - I don't see anything about you needing to like anything she says or how you shouldn't come here. She stated a very valid and legitimate point that you should also take in to consideration when you're complaining about pregnant women complaining about being pregnant.... on a pregnancy message board. Make sense?

Can you see how your reaction telling her to suck it was inappropriate and that your perception of what she said was inaccurate?

lovelyday39 · December 2012

rayofsunshine99:
tsharon:
rayofsunshine99:
tsharon:
Bink720:
rayofsunshine99:
Re: complaining.... When I was pregnant with DS (it was unplanned) and I complained a lot about all the discomforts of being pregnant. This pregnancy was very much planned for and we lost two babies during the 14 months we were trying. There are times that I get frustrated about something and think to complain and then I think about my friends who are struggling/unable to get pregnant and how they would give anything to have heartburn, sleepless nights or have people telling them that they look 'way farther along than they are'. (something I just complained about the other day) I try to keep voicing these complaints to a minimum, and even more so, when I'm feeling frustrated or annoyed by a pregnancy related thing, it helps to "check myself" and remember how lucky I am. Suddenly the thing(s) I was irritated about don't really seem like a big deal.
I'm totally with you on the feeling grateful and remembering that I'm really lucky. On the flip side, I think you need to know your audience. I would never call one of my friends that is TTC or is struggling with IF and complain. I don't even bring up my pregnancy unless they ask. But coming onto a pregnancy board and saying you are sick of hearing people complain about being pregnant. This is where we are supposed to complain and commiserate. I do it here so I don't feel the need to put it on people IRL. I think if someone doesn't want to hear people b!tch about being pregnant, they shouldn't spend so much time on a pregnancy board. I don't think it's very fair to go to a pregnancy board and make women feel bad for talking about what they are going through.
Hahaha, yeah. I totally don't belong here. I get it. You're a real peach, aren't you? Keep whining about how miserable you are. It only makes you look stupid. And don't "hint" again that I shouldn't spend so much time on this board. I've earned my right to be here. I've supported these ladies, been excited for these ladies, commiserated with these ladies...I've been a part of their journey, as they have been mine. So suck it.
Woah tsharon - Bink has been very diplomatic about her responses and has not said anything in a mean or malicious way. She has acknowledged aspects of your POV while also providing an alternative POV from her/our aspect as well, for you to consider and perhaps respect?
Telling someone to "Suck it" or saying that she implied you don't belong here etc... is not cool at all.
Telling her to suck it was a reaction to her basically saying that I shouldn't come here if I didn't like every single thing that is said. I did NOT think it was very diplomatic. And she basically DID imply that I shouldn't be here if I didn't like it every time someone whined. That's not really fair, is it? I don't have to like everything everyone says. I'm allowed to have an opinion and STILL be part of this board. Just like women who whine about their pregnancies. They are allowed to whine, and I'm allowed to think it's stupid. I have already explained that I think there's a big, BIG difference between most of the women here and the whiners.
She didn't "basically say you shouldn't come here if she didn't like every single thing that she said". That may have been your interpretation of it, but it was not what she said. To quote, "But coming onto a pregnancy board and saying you are sick of hearing people complain about being pregnant. This is where we are supposed to complain and commiserate. I do it here so I don't feel the need to put it on people IRL." Take those sentences for what they say - I don't see anything about you needing to like anything she says or how you shouldn't come here. She stated a very valid and legitimate point that you should also take in to consideration when you're complaining about pregnant women complaining about being pregnant.... on a pregnancy message board. Make sense?

Seriously, tsharon, put the shovel down.

tsharon · December 2012

rayofsunshine99:
tsharon:
rayofsunshine99:
tsharon:
Bink720:
rayofsunshine99:
Re: complaining.... When I was pregnant with DS (it was unplanned) and I complained a lot about all the discomforts of being pregnant. This pregnancy was very much planned for and we lost two babies during the 14 months we were trying. There are times that I get frustrated about something and think to complain and then I think about my friends who are struggling/unable to get pregnant and how they would give anything to have heartburn, sleepless nights or have people telling them that they look 'way farther along than they are'. (something I just complained about the other day) I try to keep voicing these complaints to a minimum, and even more so, when I'm feeling frustrated or annoyed by a pregnancy related thing, it helps to "check myself" and remember how lucky I am. Suddenly the thing(s) I was irritated about don't really seem like a big deal.
I'm totally with you on the feeling grateful and remembering that I'm really lucky. On the flip side, I think you need to know your audience. I would never call one of my friends that is TTC or is struggling with IF and complain. I don't even bring up my pregnancy unless they ask. But coming onto a pregnancy board and saying you are sick of hearing people complain about being pregnant. This is where we are supposed to complain and commiserate. I do it here so I don't feel the need to put it on people IRL. I think if someone doesn't want to hear people b!tch about being pregnant, they shouldn't spend so much time on a pregnancy board. I don't think it's very fair to go to a pregnancy board and make women feel bad for talking about what they are going through.
Hahaha, yeah. I totally don't belong here. I get it. You're a real peach, aren't you? Keep whining about how miserable you are. It only makes you look stupid. And don't "hint" again that I shouldn't spend so much time on this board. I've earned my right to be here. I've supported these ladies, been excited for these ladies, commiserated with these ladies...I've been a part of their journey, as they have been mine. So suck it.
Woah tsharon - Bink has been very diplomatic about her responses and has not said anything in a mean or malicious way. She has acknowledged aspects of your POV while also providing an alternative POV from her/our aspect as well, for you to consider and perhaps respect?
Telling someone to "Suck it" or saying that she implied you don't belong here etc... is not cool at all.
Telling her to suck it was a reaction to her basically saying that I shouldn't come here if I didn't like every single thing that is said. I did NOT think it was very diplomatic. And she basically DID imply that I shouldn't be here if I didn't like it every time someone whined. That's not really fair, is it? I don't have to like everything everyone says. I'm allowed to have an opinion and STILL be part of this board. Just like women who whine about their pregnancies. They are allowed to whine, and I'm allowed to think it's stupid. I have already explained that I think there's a big, BIG difference between most of the women here and the whiners.
She didn't "basically say you shouldn't come here if she didn't like every single thing that she said". That may have been your interpretation of it, but it was not what she said. To quote, "But coming onto a pregnancy board and saying you are sick of hearing people complain about being pregnant. This is where we are supposed to complain and commiserate. I do it here so I don't feel the need to put it on people IRL." Take those sentences for what they say - I don't see anything about you needing to like anything she says or how you shouldn't come here. She stated a very valid and legitimate point that you should also take in to consideration when you're complaining about pregnant women complaining about being pregnant.... on a pregnancy message board. Make sense?

Um, here's ANOTHER quote of hers. "I think if someone doesn't want to hear people b!tch about being pregnant, they shouldn't spend so much time on a pregnancy board."

So, no. That doesn't make sense to me. Again, I urge you to consider that I have the right to be and NOT like that certain people are whiny about what IS a gift. They have the right to whine, I have the right to think it's ridiculous.

rayofsunshine99 · December 2012

lovelyday39:
rayofsunshine99:
tsharon:
rayofsunshine99:
tsharon:
Bink720:
rayofsunshine99:
Re: complaining.... When I was pregnant with DS (it was unplanned) and I complained a lot about all the discomforts of being pregnant. This pregnancy was very much planned for and we lost two babies during the 14 months we were trying. There are times that I get frustrated about something and think to complain and then I think about my friends who are struggling/unable to get pregnant and how they would give anything to have heartburn, sleepless nights or have people telling them that they look 'way farther along than they are'. (something I just complained about the other day) I try to keep voicing these complaints to a minimum, and even more so, when I'm feeling frustrated or annoyed by a pregnancy related thing, it helps to "check myself" and remember how lucky I am. Suddenly the thing(s) I was irritated about don't really seem like a big deal.
I'm totally with you on the feeling grateful and remembering that I'm really lucky. On the flip side, I think you need to know your audience. I would never call one of my friends that is TTC or is struggling with IF and complain. I don't even bring up my pregnancy unless they ask. But coming onto a pregnancy board and saying you are sick of hearing people complain about being pregnant. This is where we are supposed to complain and commiserate. I do it here so I don't feel the need to put it on people IRL. I think if someone doesn't want to hear people b!tch about being pregnant, they shouldn't spend so much time on a pregnancy board. I don't think it's very fair to go to a pregnancy board and make women feel bad for talking about what they are going through.
Hahaha, yeah. I totally don't belong here. I get it. You're a real peach, aren't you? Keep whining about how miserable you are. It only makes you look stupid. And don't "hint" again that I shouldn't spend so much time on this board. I've earned my right to be here. I've supported these ladies, been excited for these ladies, commiserated with these ladies...I've been a part of their journey, as they have been mine. So suck it.
Woah tsharon - Bink has been very diplomatic about her responses and has not said anything in a mean or malicious way. She has acknowledged aspects of your POV while also providing an alternative POV from her/our aspect as well, for you to consider and perhaps respect?
Telling someone to "Suck it" or saying that she implied you don't belong here etc... is not cool at all.
Telling her to suck it was a reaction to her basically saying that I shouldn't come here if I didn't like every single thing that is said. I did NOT think it was very diplomatic. And she basically DID imply that I shouldn't be here if I didn't like it every time someone whined. That's not really fair, is it? I don't have to like everything everyone says. I'm allowed to have an opinion and STILL be part of this board. Just like women who whine about their pregnancies. They are allowed to whine, and I'm allowed to think it's stupid. I have already explained that I think there's a big, BIG difference between most of the women here and the whiners.
She didn't "basically say you shouldn't come here if she didn't like every single thing that she said". That may have been your interpretation of it, but it was not what she said. To quote, "But coming onto a pregnancy board and saying you are sick of hearing people complain about being pregnant. This is where we are supposed to complain and commiserate. I do it here so I don't feel the need to put it on people IRL." Take those sentences for what they say - I don't see anything about you needing to like anything she says or how you shouldn't come here. She stated a very valid and legitimate point that you should also take in to consideration when you're complaining about pregnant women complaining about being pregnant.... on a pregnancy message board. Make sense?

Seriously, tsharon, put the shovel down.

To add to the clusterfluckofquotes... did you mean to quote me? Lol.

tsharon · December 2012

lovelyday39:
rayofsunshine99:
tsharon:
rayofsunshine99:
tsharon:
Bink720:
rayofsunshine99:
Re: complaining.... When I was pregnant with DS (it was unplanned) and I complained a lot about all the discomforts of being pregnant. This pregnancy was very much planned for and we lost two babies during the 14 months we were trying. There are times that I get frustrated about something and think to complain and then I think about my friends who are struggling/unable to get pregnant and how they would give anything to have heartburn, sleepless nights or have people telling them that they look 'way farther along than they are'. (something I just complained about the other day) I try to keep voicing these complaints to a minimum, and even more so, when I'm feeling frustrated or annoyed by a pregnancy related thing, it helps to "check myself" and remember how lucky I am. Suddenly the thing(s) I was irritated about don't really seem like a big deal.
I'm totally with you on the feeling grateful and remembering that I'm really lucky. On the flip side, I think you need to know your audience. I would never call one of my friends that is TTC or is struggling with IF and complain. I don't even bring up my pregnancy unless they ask. But coming onto a pregnancy board and saying you are sick of hearing people complain about being pregnant. This is where we are supposed to complain and commiserate. I do it here so I don't feel the need to put it on people IRL. I think if someone doesn't want to hear people b!tch about being pregnant, they shouldn't spend so much time on a pregnancy board. I don't think it's very fair to go to a pregnancy board and make women feel bad for talking about what they are going through.
Hahaha, yeah. I totally don't belong here. I get it. You're a real peach, aren't you? Keep whining about how miserable you are. It only makes you look stupid. And don't "hint" again that I shouldn't spend so much time on this board. I've earned my right to be here. I've supported these ladies, been excited for these ladies, commiserated with these ladies...I've been a part of their journey, as they have been mine. So suck it.
Woah tsharon - Bink has been very diplomatic about her responses and has not said anything in a mean or malicious way. She has acknowledged aspects of your POV while also providing an alternative POV from her/our aspect as well, for you to consider and perhaps respect?
Telling someone to "Suck it" or saying that she implied you don't belong here etc... is not cool at all.
Telling her to suck it was a reaction to her basically saying that I shouldn't come here if I didn't like every single thing that is said. I did NOT think it was very diplomatic. And she basically DID imply that I shouldn't be here if I didn't like it every time someone whined. That's not really fair, is it? I don't have to like everything everyone says. I'm allowed to have an opinion and STILL be part of this board. Just like women who whine about their pregnancies. They are allowed to whine, and I'm allowed to think it's stupid. I have already explained that I think there's a big, BIG difference between most of the women here and the whiners.
She didn't "basically say you shouldn't come here if she didn't like every single thing that she said". That may have been your interpretation of it, but it was not what she said. To quote, "But coming onto a pregnancy board and saying you are sick of hearing people complain about being pregnant. This is where we are supposed to complain and commiserate. I do it here so I don't feel the need to put it on people IRL." Take those sentences for what they say - I don't see anything about you needing to like anything she says or how you shouldn't come here. She stated a very valid and legitimate point that you should also take in to consideration when you're complaining about pregnant women complaining about being pregnant.... on a pregnancy message board. Make sense?

Seriously, tsharon, put the shovel down.

So I shouldn't respond? Y'all can say whatever the he!l you want, like you telling me I'm "sucky", but then when I try and explain myself, I should shut up?

Yeah, right.

lovelyday39 · December 2012

tsharon:
lovelyday39:
rayofsunshine99:
tsharon:
rayofsunshine99:
tsharon:
Bink720:
rayofsunshine99:
Re: complaining.... When I was pregnant with DS (it was unplanned) and I complained a lot about all the discomforts of being pregnant. This pregnancy was very much planned for and we lost two babies during the 14 months we were trying. There are times that I get frustrated about something and think to complain and then I think about my friends who are struggling/unable to get pregnant and how they would give anything to have heartburn, sleepless nights or have people telling them that they look 'way farther along than they are'. (something I just complained about the other day) I try to keep voicing these complaints to a minimum, and even more so, when I'm feeling frustrated or annoyed by a pregnancy related thing, it helps to "check myself" and remember how lucky I am. Suddenly the thing(s) I was irritated about don't really seem like a big deal.
I'm totally with you on the feeling grateful and remembering that I'm really lucky. On the flip side, I think you need to know your audience. I would never call one of my friends that is TTC or is struggling with IF and complain. I don't even bring up my pregnancy unless they ask. But coming onto a pregnancy board and saying you are sick of hearing people complain about being pregnant. This is where we are supposed to complain and commiserate. I do it here so I don't feel the need to put it on people IRL. I think if someone doesn't want to hear people b!tch about being pregnant, they shouldn't spend so much time on a pregnancy board. I don't think it's very fair to go to a pregnancy board and make women feel bad for talking about what they are going through.
Hahaha, yeah. I totally don't belong here. I get it. You're a real peach, aren't you? Keep whining about how miserable you are. It only makes you look stupid. And don't "hint" again that I shouldn't spend so much time on this board. I've earned my right to be here. I've supported these ladies, been excited for these ladies, commiserated with these ladies...I've been a part of their journey, as they have been mine. So suck it.
Woah tsharon - Bink has been very diplomatic about her responses and has not said anything in a mean or malicious way. She has acknowledged aspects of your POV while also providing an alternative POV from her/our aspect as well, for you to consider and perhaps respect?
Telling someone to "Suck it" or saying that she implied you don't belong here etc... is not cool at all.
Telling her to suck it was a reaction to her basically saying that I shouldn't come here if I didn't like every single thing that is said. I did NOT think it was very diplomatic. And she basically DID imply that I shouldn't be here if I didn't like it every time someone whined. That's not really fair, is it? I don't have to like everything everyone says. I'm allowed to have an opinion and STILL be part of this board. Just like women who whine about their pregnancies. They are allowed to whine, and I'm allowed to think it's stupid. I have already explained that I think there's a big, BIG difference between most of the women here and the whiners.
She didn't "basically say you shouldn't come here if she didn't like every single thing that she said". That may have been your interpretation of it, but it was not what she said. To quote, "But coming onto a pregnancy board and saying you are sick of hearing people complain about being pregnant. This is where we are supposed to complain and commiserate. I do it here so I don't feel the need to put it on people IRL." Take those sentences for what they say - I don't see anything about you needing to like anything she says or how you shouldn't come here. She stated a very valid and legitimate point that you should also take in to consideration when you're complaining about pregnant women complaining about being pregnant.... on a pregnancy message board. Make sense?

Seriously, tsharon, put the shovel down.
So I shouldn't respond? Y'all can say whatever the he!l you want, like you telling me I'm "sucky", but then when I try and explain myself, I should shut up?
Yeah, right.

I think you're totally overreacting here and not listening to anyone while trying to backpedal on your original pt. I think you're going feel bad about this tomorrow and not many people are going to want to hear an apology b/c this has sort of become a pattern. And what you originally said- about shutting up and enjoying it- yeah, it's sucky.

tsharon · December 2012

lovelyday39:
tsharon:
lovelyday39:
rayofsunshine99:
tsharon:
rayofsunshine99:
tsharon:
Bink720:
rayofsunshine99:
Re: complaining.... When I was pregnant with DS (it was unplanned) and I complained a lot about all the discomforts of being pregnant. This pregnancy was very much planned for and we lost two babies during the 14 months we were trying. There are times that I get frustrated about something and think to complain and then I think about my friends who are struggling/unable to get pregnant and how they would give anything to have heartburn, sleepless nights or have people telling them that they look 'way farther along than they are'. (something I just complained about the other day) I try to keep voicing these complaints to a minimum, and even more so, when I'm feeling frustrated or annoyed by a pregnancy related thing, it helps to "check myself" and remember how lucky I am. Suddenly the thing(s) I was irritated about don't really seem like a big deal.
I'm totally with you on the feeling grateful and remembering that I'm really lucky. On the flip side, I think you need to know your audience. I would never call one of my friends that is TTC or is struggling with IF and complain. I don't even bring up my pregnancy unless they ask. But coming onto a pregnancy board and saying you are sick of hearing people complain about being pregnant. This is where we are supposed to complain and commiserate. I do it here so I don't feel the need to put it on people IRL. I think if someone doesn't want to hear people b!tch about being pregnant, they shouldn't spend so much time on a pregnancy board. I don't think it's very fair to go to a pregnancy board and make women feel bad for talking about what they are going through.
Hahaha, yeah. I totally don't belong here. I get it. You're a real peach, aren't you? Keep whining about how miserable you are. It only makes you look stupid. And don't "hint" again that I shouldn't spend so much time on this board. I've earned my right to be here. I've supported these ladies, been excited for these ladies, commiserated with these ladies...I've been a part of their journey, as they have been mine. So suck it.
Woah tsharon - Bink has been very diplomatic about her responses and has not said anything in a mean or malicious way. She has acknowledged aspects of your POV while also providing an alternative POV from her/our aspect as well, for you to consider and perhaps respect?
Telling someone to "Suck it" or saying that she implied you don't belong here etc... is not cool at all.
Telling her to suck it was a reaction to her basically saying that I shouldn't come here if I didn't like every single thing that is said. I did NOT think it was very diplomatic. And she basically DID imply that I shouldn't be here if I didn't like it every time someone whined. That's not really fair, is it? I don't have to like everything everyone says. I'm allowed to have an opinion and STILL be part of this board. Just like women who whine about their pregnancies. They are allowed to whine, and I'm allowed to think it's stupid. I have already explained that I think there's a big, BIG difference between most of the women here and the whiners.
She didn't "basically say you shouldn't come here if she didn't like every single thing that she said". That may have been your interpretation of it, but it was not what she said. To quote, "But coming onto a pregnancy board and saying you are sick of hearing people complain about being pregnant. This is where we are supposed to complain and commiserate. I do it here so I don't feel the need to put it on people IRL." Take those sentences for what they say - I don't see anything about you needing to like anything she says or how you shouldn't come here. She stated a very valid and legitimate point that you should also take in to consideration when you're complaining about pregnant women complaining about being pregnant.... on a pregnancy message board. Make sense?

Seriously, tsharon, put the shovel down.
So I shouldn't respond? Y'all can say whatever the he!l you want, like you telling me I'm "sucky", but then when I try and explain myself, I should shut up?
Yeah, right.
I think you're totally overreacting here and not listening to anyone while trying to backpedal on your original pt. I think you're going feel bad about this tomorrow and not many people are going to want to hear an apology b/c this has sort of become a pattern. And what you originally said- about shutting up and enjoying it- yeah, it's sucky.

I'm clearly listening to every post, and responding accordingly. I'm not going to feel bad about a DAMM thing, because I stand by everything I've said. A pattern? Okay. Whatever. I think we've already established that there are some people here who like me, and some who really don't. If you'd like to go sit with the people who don't, please feel free. I won't be apologizing for this.

tsharon · December 2012

Grace0609:
Please name names and provide some links as to the type of "whining" you are trying to distinguish from acceptable complaining, tsharon. Your backpedaling and confusing statements leave me now with actually little idea of what you are talking about.

I should think that as a grown woman, you would be capable of identifying the difference between the women here who do nothing but whine, and those who don't. I'm not backpedaling on a damm thing. Good try, though. I addressed each response to me, and I clearly admitted in previous posts that I should have clarified my original statement. I'm not going back on ANYTHING. I'm TIRED of the whiny women. I'm also getting really tired of CERTAIN people doing the same *** over and over...case in point...when I try to explain something, they want to jump my sh!t. The first time this kind of thing happened, I DID backpedal because I didn't want to ruffle a bunch of feathers. I've been here long enough that I know who I don't like and who doesn't like me. But when people call me out, I'm GOING to respond. Don't like it? Don't come at me. Simple, right? (And to CLARIFY, I'm not saying that you, Grace, came at me.)

OhSewCrafty · December 2012

Grace0609:
Please name names and provide some links as to the type of "whining" you are trying to distinguish from acceptable complaining, tsharon. Your backpedaling and confusing statements leave me now with actually little idea of what you are talking about.

This is what I was thinking about the entire time I was reading through those monster quotes. You're not the whining police, tsharon. If you have a problem with individuals and the way they communicate/contribute on the board, tell them about it. Chances are, they don't even realize it. Don't, instead, blast generalizations about pregnant women bitching about mild to debilitating symptoms they should automatically be happy to have.

tsharon · December 2012

OhSewCrafty:
Grace0609:
Please name names and provide some links as to the type of "whining" you are trying to distinguish from acceptable complaining, tsharon. Your backpedaling and confusing statements leave me now with actually little idea of what you are talking about.
This is what I was thinking about the entire time I was reading through those monster quotes. You're not the whining police, tsharon. If you have a problem with individuals and the way they communicate/contribute on the board, tell them about it. Chances are, they don't even realize it. Don't, instead, blast generalizations about pregnant women bitching about mild to debilitating symptoms they should automatically be happy to have.

OH.MY.GOD.

Do y'all not READ? Did I not explain this ALREADY?

And these are CONFESSIONS on CONFESSION FRIDAY.

FFS!

OhSewCrafty · December 2012

tsharon:
OhSewCrafty:
Grace0609:
Please name names and provide some links as to the type of "whining" you are trying to distinguish from acceptable complaining, tsharon. Your backpedaling and confusing statements leave me now with actually little idea of what you are talking about.
This is what I was thinking about the entire time I was reading through those monster quotes. You're not the whining police, tsharon. If you have a problem with individuals and the way they communicate/contribute on the board, tell them about it. Chances are, they don't even realize it. Don't, instead, blast generalizations about pregnant women bitching about mild to debilitating symptoms they should automatically be happy to have.
OH.MY.GOD.
Do y'all not READ? Did I not explain this ALREADY?
And these are CONFESSIONS on CONFESSION FRIDAY.
FFS!

Yeah, I get that, but there is an actual solution to this one. If you have a problem with "the whiners" or whomever, you should say something to them. I'm pretty sure ::rescans what I just wrote:: that's all I said above.

tsharon · December 2012

OhSewCrafty:
tsharon:
OhSewCrafty:
Grace0609:
Please name names and provide some links as to the type of "whining" you are trying to distinguish from acceptable complaining, tsharon. Your backpedaling and confusing statements leave me now with actually little idea of what you are talking about.
This is what I was thinking about the entire time I was reading through those monster quotes. You're not the whining police, tsharon. If you have a problem with individuals and the way they communicate/contribute on the board, tell them about it. Chances are, they don't even realize it. Don't, instead, blast generalizations about pregnant women bitching about mild to debilitating symptoms they should automatically be happy to have.
OH.MY.GOD.
Do y'all not READ? Did I not explain this ALREADY?
And these are CONFESSIONS on CONFESSION FRIDAY.
FFS!
Yeah, I get that, but there is an actual solution to this one. If you have a problem with "the whiners" or whomever, you should say something to them. I'm pretty sure ::rescans what I just wrote:: that's all I said above.

We both know that one of the nice things about confession friday is being able to say something that may strike a chord with some of the readers who may recognize themselves.

It's much less confrontational than saying "HEY. YOU'RE REALLY EFFING ANNOYING, SO DIAL DOWN THE CRAZY, OKAY?"

But I get what you're saying, and you know, I have every right to just skip past those whiny posts/responses/etc. But I did think confession friday was about confessing, so I did. I got called out for it several times, and when I felt it was justified I explained myself further. I can't do anything else than that.

tsharon · December 2012

Grace0609:
tsharon:

Grace0609:
Please name names and provide some links as to the type of "whining" you are trying to distinguish from acceptable complaining, tsharon. Your backpedaling and confusing statements leave me now with actually little idea of what you are talking about.

I should think that as a grown woman, you would be capable of identifying the difference between the women here who do nothing but whine, and those who don't. I'm not backpedaling on a damm thing. Good try, though. I addressed each response to me, and I clearly admitted in previous posts that I should have clarified my original statement. I'm not going back on ANYTHING. I'm TIRED of the whiny women. I'm also getting really tired of CERTAIN people doing the same *** over and over...case in point...when I try to explain something, they want to jump my sh!t. The first time this kind of thing happened, I DID backpedal because I didn't want to ruffle a bunch of feathers. I've been here long enough that I know who I don't like and who doesn't like me. But when people call me out, I'm GOING to respond. Don't like it? Don't come at me. Simple, right? (And to CLARIFY, I'm not saying that you, Grace, came at me.)

I actually don't know who you think are the whiners. I can discern (as a grown woman) who *I* think are whiners, but I have a feeling my list would differ from yours, but I can't quite follow exactly what you are referring to, and, therefore, I am guessing other people can't either. You are free to complain in general terms on the board, but if something seriously pisses you off, you might actually get people to think about what they were doing that was annoying if we could tell exactly to what you were referring.

I'm quite sure your list and mine are very different. And we can leave it at that, can't we? It was my confession, I clarified it when called upon, but I'm not going to name names. If people don't see themselves in the post, then I'm not going to just call them out on it. There's a line I won't cross.

Bink720 · December 2012

tsharon:

Telling her to suck it was a reaction to her basically saying that I shouldn't come here if I didn't like every single thing that is said. I did NOT think it was very diplomatic. And she basically DID imply that I shouldn't be here if I didn't like it every time someone whined. That's not really fair, is it? I don't have to like everything everyone says. I'm allowed to have an opinion and STILL be part of this board. Just like women who whine about their pregnancies. They are allowed to whine, and I'm allowed to think it's stupid. I have already explained that I think there's a big, BIG difference between most of the women here and the whiners.

So since you've quoted me over and over again I thought I'd clarify again. Since you have not once quoted my follow up post.

Bink720:
I'm not saying that Tsharon (or anyone else in a non-traditional situation) can't or shouldn't be apart of the community. She obviously already is. But just like she is trying to make us be aware of how lucky we are. She needs to understand that it's not easy for most of us either. And that if she's going to seek out a pregnancy forum, we are going to talk about being pregnant, the good, the bad and the really really ugly.

You quoted over and over how I said if you don't want to read about pregnancy then don't go to a pregnancy board. And I stand by that. You are a grown woman. You should know your limits and know if you feel up to reading people's posts and updates. If you don't feel up to it, it's your responsibility to step away from the computer and take a break. It's not realistic to think the 100's of women on our BMB are suddenly going to stop posting about the bad parts of what they are going through.

But I also said that you were already a part of our community and that sensitivity goes both ways. Instead of just saying I see your point and moving on. You have blatantly ignored that and lashed out at several regular members of the board. You didn't come on here and say "it's hard for me to read all of these complaints when I would give anything to be one of the people complaining." You came on, first FFFC post of the day and told every one of us to stop complaining and "shut up and enjoy it." And because I pointed out that sensitivity goes both ways you lashed out at me, said I must be new and that I must be one of the whiners and people were sick of hearing my complaints. You came out fighting today, and for no reason. I haven't seen a respectful post or discussion on your side today. Just back pedaling, "Oh I didn't mean you." "Of course not you." "Well that is obviously not what I'm talking about." I genuinely don't care that you don't like me, but if you are going to act like I told you that you don't belong here you need a reality check. Me saying you have the power to step away from the board (or just not open posts you don't like) is not the same as me saying you shouldn't be here. Don't put words or implications in my mouth.

tsharon · December 2012

Bink720:
tsharon:

Telling her to suck it was a reaction to her basically saying that I shouldn't come here if I didn't like every single thing that is said. I did NOT think it was very diplomatic. And she basically DID imply that I shouldn't be here if I didn't like it every time someone whined. That's not really fair, is it? I don't have to like everything everyone says. I'm allowed to have an opinion and STILL be part of this board. Just like women who whine about their pregnancies. They are allowed to whine, and I'm allowed to think it's stupid. I have already explained that I think there's a big, BIG difference between most of the women here and the whiners.
So since you've quoted me over and over again I thought I'd clarify again. Since you have not once quoted my follow up post.
Bink720:
I'm not saying that Tsharon (or anyone else in a non-traditional situation) can't or shouldn't be apart of the community. She obviously already is. But just like she is trying to make us be aware of how lucky we are. She needs to understand that it's not easy for most of us either. And that if she's going to seek out a pregnancy forum, we are going to talk about being pregnant, the good, the bad and the really really ugly.

You quoted over and over how I said if you don't want to read about pregnancy then don't go to a pregnancy board. And I stand by that. You are a grown woman. You should know your limits and know if you feel up to reading people's posts and updates. If you don't feel up to it, it's your responsibility to step away from the computer and take a break. It's not realistic to think the 100's of women on our BMB are suddenly going to stop posting about the bad parts of what they are going through.
But I also said that you were already a part of our community and that sensitivity goes both ways. Instead of just saying I see your point and moving on. You have blatantly ignored that and lashed out at several regular members of the board. You didn't come on here and say "it's hard for me to read all of these complaints when I would give anything to be one of the people complaining." You came on, first FFFC post of the day and told every one of us to stop complaining and "shut up and enjoy it." And because I pointed out that sensitivity goes both ways you lashed out at me, said I must be new and that I must be one of the whiners and people were sick of hearing my complaints. You came out fighting today, and for no reason. I haven't seen a respectful post or discussion on your side today. Just back pedaling, "Oh I didn't mean you." "Of course not you." "Well that is obviously not what I'm talking about." I genuinely don't care that you don't like me, but if you are going to act like I told you that you don't belong here you need a reality check. Me saying you have the power to step away from the board (or just not open posts you don't like) is not the same as me saying you shouldn't be here. Don't put words or implications in my mouth.

You, too, are a grown woman. If you don't like that I don't like something, deal with it. You haven't seen a respectful post or discussion in regard to what? Just this particular thread? Since I've been called upon to clarify so much today, now I'll ask you to clarify.

You can think what you want, I didn't backpedal and I don't plan on it. I explained myself when I felt I should, and I'm glad I did. I hadn't CLARIFIED my original post, and so I did later when it became apparent that some people were upset by it.

I genuinely don't care if you like me, either. There's a whole section of people here who don't like me. I'm busy crying in my beer about it.

By saying I shouldn't spend time here if I don't like something that's said, it SOUNDS different to me than perhaps you INTENDED it.

And I already said that if I read it wrong, then I was sorry. I'm not going to apologize to you again. I still think it sounded like "well if you don't like it, then stay off the boards." I still refer you to my post that said if that wasn't how you meant it, then I apologize. My stance isn't going to change, so this back and forth is pointless.

WorkinWeezel · December 2012

This whole situation is very annoying and a huge part of the reason why I, a Bump regular since 2009, have not been spending a lot of time on here.

tsharon · December 2012

WorkinWeezel:
This whole situation is very annoying and a huge part of the reason why I, a Bump regular since 2009, have not been spending a lot of time on here.

You know, Weezel, I'm sorry that it got blown out of proportion. And I hope you don't stay away. I don't particularly care for being jumped on, and I probably responded to certain people that I shouldn't have bothered with. I've been much more quiet on this board than I used to be, for exactly this reason. I don't want anyone to feel as if they have to leave because of all the damm drama. I posted something, then needed to clarify it because I hadn't in my OP, and it snowballed from there. You, personally, have my apologies. Don't stay away because of a few cat fights.

Monsieur_et_Madame_Ha · December 2012

Mrs.Leah.Maria:
Monsieur_et_Madame_Ha:

Thank you - Another confession is that I was anxious to see if you'd comment on my FFFC. ::blushing smiley::
Awww, of course girl. Now which one of us is Yin and the other Yang?

Your pick

ETA - WTF happened here today?! ::Slowly backs out of post::