Am I being a b*tch?

hhiett607

I want to send an email to family that usually watches my DD about safety guidelines since DD now crawls and self feeds (as in puts everything in her mouth). Also with it getting cold I want to make sure they don't put her wearing a puffy coat in the car seat. Is it over protective to send an email to my sister-in-law (who watches kindergarten age and older kids but doesn't have kids) and my in-laws (who haven't been around babies in 20yrs)?

MeganSony

Maybe this would be more appropriate to discuss in person. Just say I'm just a little nervous about things and want to make sure we're on the same page. I think if you email it, it could come off a little harsher than intended. Plus Those rules aren't really hard to remember, so they wouldn't need to refer to an email.

MeganSony

FWIW, I don't think that you are a B though. You're just thinking of your daughter.

hhiett607

Thanks! I think my biggest concern is that my FIL is 66 and very forgetful and I try to make sure he's never alone with DD. He wasn't really an active parent until his son was 8. He's also the one I have the biggest problems with so I want it to be conversational but firm in what his responsibilities are in care taker.

Jen0204

I agree to do it in person. That way you can also look around their place and check out any hazards. And I would try to do it in the perspective of telling a story (even if its one that you make up!), such as "You will never guess what LO did the other day - she put the end of my cell phone charger in her mouth!" (which Nat does whenever I forget to put it away...). That way you open their eyes to potential issues without making them feel like you're attacking them.

Of course, those are just the kind of games I had to play when my sister was involved with their care (which is part of why I moved them to daycare). Hopefully your family isn't as nuts as mine! 

laura.noel

I'd talk to them in person first, but then offer to give it to them in writing.

For example, end the conversation with, 

"To make it easier for you, why don't I write this all down in an email when I get home and send it to you?"

I agree that you don't want to sound too harsh, but your daughter's safety is more important than whether you sound bitchy.

jju_stb_jju

I agree to do it in person. Also since its your in laws your worried about I think your dh should be the one to bring it up.