Being a prego bridesmaid..... — The Bump
1st Trimester

Being a prego bridesmaid.....

So.. I found out I am pregnant last week and will be 5 weeks tomorrow. On November 9th, I will be in my cousin's wedding. I am so excited to be pregnant but at the same time a little sad that I can't party with the girls! I know that sounds mean and selfish but its true! I would NEVER drink while being pregnant.  Next week is going to be a challange. I'm not sure what to do to not let them figure out that I am expecting. When they are passing around drinks and shots what should I do? I am not a party animal, but my cousins and friends and I have fun when we are together and they are going to notice something is up.  Any advice?

Re: Being a prego bridesmaid.....

  • Tell them you're on antibiotics so you can't drink.
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  • image stacia601:

    image Bonjuju:
    Tell them you're on antibiotics so you can't drink.

    I was going to say the same thing.

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    Had to chime in as this is one of the most obvious excuses.It really just calls attention to whether or not you're drinking. I tried it once and got sniffed out quick.

    Try to fake drink. Your husband can help. Hold a half empty beer bottle he drank from most of the night. Have him order your "cocktails" for you, which are sodas with lime. Hand him other drinks and shots you receive or put them discreetly to the side. Most likely no one will notice. When I did this another time no one had a clue.

    Or you could just tell your friends. Though this would kinda suck for your friend getting married so maybe not.

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  • You can always go with the "We're trying and don't know yet."

    Club soda and lime is an easy one, as is cran 7up to look like a real drink if you don't want to fess up.

    Or, volunteer to DD?

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  • I was the MOH in my sisters wedding last weekend and seriously deserve an Academy Award!! We took a party bus and everything so I was more than expected to participate and it would have been obvious if I didn't go or used the antibiotic excuse. Luckily, DH was on the bus with me so kept trading his empty beers for my full one and I fake drank out of the can so it looked like I was drinking. I also pretended to drink during the toasts at dinner. I ordered fake drinks all night from the bar so it still appeared to others that I was drinking. No one has said anything so I'm thinking I got away with it!
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  • Meh. Last pregnancy I was in a wedding at 39 weeks.  I had a glass of champagne.  It's no big deal IMO, you could just nurse one beer all night long or something.
      
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  • Thanks guys.  The antibiotic excuse would never work with them! They know that I would prob have drinks anyway especially for her wedding. I was discussing with my husband and he said he will be ordering me my "drinks" and I guess I will just act tipsy LOL this will be lots of fun!! My only worry is the shots at the begining. Ill prob say I don't like the shot or that I had one already.  Once the beginning of the party starts and my husband and I can meet at the bar it will be much easier!
  • Fake drinks would never work with me....everyone is all about group shots at the bar...so they would definitely see if I didn't drink it.

    On a side note ....hiding from family is soooo draining .....I see my in-laws almost every week so I've been hiding. I told my sil and she has really been helping me to cover since I've been having bad m/s. She lives closest to me and I see her very often so  if I don't make it to a family gathering she says we had lunch earlier in the day or I'm busy but meeting her later. We even got "food poisoning"  and were both sick for a week ..... cuz I totally tossed my cookies in the middle of a family get together. She is a sweetheart... I love her! 

    I am gonna give in and tell them after the first scan..... I'm missing my social life. They all think DH is baby- phobic so they don't suspect and it will be a big surprise. 

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  • BONJUJU

    I hear you! Its not easy to stay away from family. I've been so nervous of slipping! My husband and I haven't told a soul yet because we were waiting for me to get blood work.  I live in NJ and was affected by Sandy so I have not been able to get a dr. on the phone until today. They want me to wait till November 15th.  There is no way that I will be able to keep this a secret from our parents and my best friend for that long ! lol We plan on telling them tomorrow. I think you should too! You are at 9 weeks- a full 4 weeks more than me! GL!

  • image AmandaGRiccardi:

    BONJUJU

    I hear you! Its not easy to stay away from family. I've been so nervous of slipping! My husband and I haven't told a soul yet because we were waiting for me to get blood work.  I live in NJ and was affected by Sandy so I have not been able to get a dr. on the phone until today. They want me to wait till November 15th.  There is no way that I will be able to keep this a secret from our parents and my best friend for that long ! lol We plan on telling them tomorrow. I think you should too! You are at 9 weeks- a full 4 weeks more than me! GL!

    I told my mom the day before my sil..... The m/s was just too awful and with DH being away I was just not making it on my own.... She has been a great help. My dad is away until December for work.... I didn't want to but it looks like I will have to tell him on the phone....I know he's gonna be sad that he's so far away right now.

    Have fun sharing your news tomorrow! I'm gonna call and see if I can get them to squish me in a day this week..... I am really fed up of hiding and lying. 

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  • i went to a wedding at 7 weeks pregnant, and just told everyone that we were TTC, and that i didnt want to risk it. 
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  • I have never in my life heard of not drinking because of antibiotics?!

    I would just fake-drink. Hold a beer, carry a cocktail at the reception, etc. Unless someone is expecting you to be pregnant they probably won't notice. Also, once everyone else is imbibing they won't be paying attention to whether or not you are. 


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  • I would go with the "we are TTC and don't want to risk it."  Fake drinking is a good idea as a cover-up, but then I would feel the need to explain myself to everyone once I announce the pregnancy.  Like "remember so-and-so's wedding where I was drunk?  Well I was pregnant then and faked drinking and being drunk."  I wouldn't want people to think I was knowingly getting smashed while I was pregnant.  I guess I care too much about what people think, lol!  Either way, hope you have a great time at the wedding! :)

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  • image jane.says:

    I have never in my life heard of not drinking because of antibiotics?!

    I would just fake-drink. Hold a beer, carry a cocktail at the reception, etc. Unless someone is expecting you to be pregnant they probably won't notice. Also, once everyone else is imbibing they won't be paying attention to whether or not you are. 


    I had never heard of it until the Bump. I"m 100% certain that if I told my friends that, they would all do this Hmm

    I just did the fake drink thing and ordered club soda with lime. It's easy to pass off as a gin & tonic.

  • I was 7.5 weeks pregnant when I stood up in a friend's wedding. We did the whole party bus, champagne getting ready thing, and I just faked it. Although, I did have a couple sits of champagne and a wine spritzer (mostly sprite) at the head table. No one noticed because I was always holding/drinking a fake drink.
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  • I was a bridesmaid in my bestfriend's wedding back in September.  We had one lady that was obviously seven months pregnant.  No question as to her not drinking.  I was in charge of passing out the drinks on the party bus.  I passed the champagne around and I had a few the said they didn't like champagne and only wanted a little.  A few of those were guys and a couple were girls - no couples were actually in the wedding party or on the bus.  I never suspected a thing because I don't really like champagne.  No one even noticed the girls not drinking again on the bus.  It turns out, the two girls that "didn't like champagne" were pregnant and so was I!!  Try to be the one passing out the drinks on the bus.  That way if you only want a sip for the toast or don't want another drink you don't have to be vocal about it. You don't have to ask yourself to pour you a glass. I also went and told the bartender before things got kicked off at the reception to make me only a "special drink or shot" whenever I approach. The girl that was six months at the actual wedding hosted the bachelorette party a few months before and was pregnant then. None of us knew.  She was busy getting all of us drinks and never herself one.  I didn't even notice.

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  • Just get a drink (sprite or something) from the bar, put a lime in it, & a straw. Nobody will know the difference. Just say you don't feel so great, so you don't want to be doing any shots. 
  • I hear you loud and clear!

    I went through this (as a personal attendant) a few weeks ago. I was pregnant at the bachelorette party and the wedding. It sucked, not gonna lie. I fake drank all night and just said that since we were trying I wasn't going to get wasted.

    I drank a lot of OJ and Sprite because I usually drink "screw ups."

    If your fam is into taking group shots that might be really hard to get out of. I personally would "fake drink" in front of them as much as possible but when it comes to shot taking, I would say "my stomach is bothering me, I'm going to pass on straight shots."

    Good luck its not fun! As a PP said, I'm not looking forward to explaining to everyone that I acutally wasn't drinking when I was 8 and 10 weeks pregnant, but oh well! I just wasn't ready to tell anyone yet.


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