October 2011 Moms

One and Done (or only children) Please Come In. Re: Holidays

If you're not having any more babies or if you grew up as the only child in the home I have a question for you. How will you/did you make the holidays special? We can't have any more children and though we're delighted with E I get sad around the holidays. Some of my favorite memories were things like trick or treating with my brother, or sorting our candy back at home together, or getting ready for bed on Christmas Eve and whispering together about what Santa was going to bring us. In my mind I feel sad for E that she won't have similar experiences. She will have cousins for sure and we'll do things with them, but I'm mostly worried about things that are done at home and not usually shared with cousins like waking up early on Christmas morning and running into the living room together. 

If you're one & done how do you plan to make the holidays special? Or if you're an only child how are your holiday memories being the only kid in the house?

Thanks! 

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Re: One and Done (or only children) Please Come In. Re: Holidays

  • I know what you mean. I grew up with a sister and would love for DD to have that experience but it isn't happening for us. DH and his brother are nine years apart, so he spent a lot of his childhood as an only and we're taking cues from that.

    Our big holiday tradition is "Apartment Christmas". The weekend before we travel to visit family, we do Christmas at home. We stay in all day, open our gifts, watch Christmas movies and eat brunch all day long.

    Last year I took DD to the Chicago Christkindle Market https://www.christkindlmarket.com/en/ and I plan to make that a tradition for the two of us. I also love baking sugar cookies and can't wait until she is big enough to bake with me.

    I guess my thoughts are that no matter how many children you have, what you do with them can be really special.

  • I wasn't an only child but I can say my siblings and I never had memories like that. We never woke up and ran to the tree and tore into the gifts. We rarely went trick or treating together.....we usually split up, either going with friends or with other family. My mom always said she thought we would have done everything together but for some reason we didn't. I loved hanging out with my cousin's....who were boys.....more than my brother and sister. And we were all close in age, my sister two years older, my brother two years younger.

    Although Gator is currently the only child we have, there are traditions I had with my former nanny kids for the past five years that I will continue regardless if we are able to have more children or not.

    I think it's more of the traditions that "make" the holiday, no so much having a sibling to share it with. I loved holidays as a kid and still made tons of memories, even though I wasn't all giddy with my brother and sister. But it was because I loved the traditions my parents had for us.
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  • We are one and done (as far as we know). I was always extremely close to my brother so waking each other up on Christmas morning, running to get our presents, and seeing what each other got was a ton of fun but in reality it was only a small portion of the whole experience.

    DH's family always celebrated Christmas on Christmas Eve by opening up presents and having a big dinner. On Christmas day they would wake up to their stockings that "Santa" brought. At our house we did everything on Christmas Day. We have decided to combine the two traditions...a big Christmas Eve dinner at home and presents from me and DH and on Christmas day DS will get his stocking from Santa at home then go to the Grandparent's for presents from extended family and Santa then finish off with a big Christmas Day dinner.

    Since we had DS so late in life all of his cousins are at least 9 years older than him. However, I think it just makes it even better for DS because he will get the most attention! 

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  • I haven't really considered how it will be in our house with just one for things like the holidays.  I try not to focus on things when I can't change the situation like that, but I can understand what you're thinking.

    I think it's just up to you if you feel it's important to include cousins in other aspects of the holidays outside of gifts on holiday mornings.  They won't notice they aren't sharing the gift opening with anyone else or don't get to compare presents with siblings.  I think you as a parent have an opportunity to be closer with your child in this situation and you are the one sharing the experience with them.

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  • I don't think it makes a big difference. I grew up as basically an only child, my siblings were 10 yrs older. Your LO may not remember snuggling up with a sibling to talk about Santa, but they will remember snuggling up next to YOU to talk about Santa which is just as special. :) it is what you make of it.
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  • I don't particularly know if there were any specific traditions that I remember growing up that were any different then what other's have.  The few things that I remember and look upon fondly are that my dad would read me to sleep with "twas the night before christmas" and my mom would sneak a small gift under a small tree in my bedroom (usually socks or an ornament.)
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