2 Questions, Closeness of Children and Quote above Crib

hohmanam

I'm sorry, these are two completely different questions, but I figured I would just post both in one thread!

 First, DH and I have been talking about plans after our son is born. This is our first and we do want to have our first two children close together. I've heard varying things, but I read at the doctor's office that they suggest having at least 1 year between children. I know there are many mom's on this board that are going to have two under two. Are there serious health risks or is it terribly bad for your body? We were going with the idea that we wouldn't use protection and just see what happens. Thoughts?

 

Secondly, I wanted to do a quote decal above the crib. I have been searching on etsy under "quote decals" "nursery quote decals" and can't find anything that I love. Does anyone have tools for finding good ones, or some advice on a quote for above the crib?

mrsodonnell12

hohmanam:

I'm sorry, these are two completely different questions, but I figured I would just post both in one thread!

 First, DH and I have been talking about plans after our son is born. This is our first and we do want to have our first two children close together. I've heard varying things, but I read at the doctor's office that they suggest having at least 1 year between children. I know there are many mom's on this board that are going to have two under two. Are there serious health risks or is it terribly bad for your body? We were going with the idea that we wouldn't use protection and just see what happens. Thoughts?

 

Secondly, I wanted to do a quote decal above the crib. I have been searching on etsy under "quote decals" "nursery quote decals" and can't find anything that I love. Does anyone have tools for finding good ones, or some advice on a quote for above the crib?

The bolded is exactly what we are going to be doing. I have a friend who has 3 under 3 (no twins) and she is super healthy and had no issues with her pregnancy. I have talked with my midwife about not going on BC after baby is born and she did not say anything about how far apart our children should be. With that said, I will be EBF so I am not too worried about gettting pregnant at least for the first 6 months. With DS, I nursed until 17 months and didnt get my period back until 18-19 months. I am hoping to get it back sooner this time though!!

bearkatjen

Getting pregnant within a year of having a baby is certainly going to put a toll on your body before you have fully recovered. That may not be a big deal if you had a really healthy pregnancy the first time around. If you were anemic, dealt with high BP, PTL, had a c-section, or other complications, your body may not be ready for pregnancy so soon after, and you could very well put you are your baby's life in danger. 

mrsodonnell12

bearkatjen:

Getting pregnant within a year of having a baby is certainly going to put a toll on your body before you have fully recovered. That may not be a big deal if you had a really healthy pregnancy the first time around. If you were anemic, dealt with high BP, PTL, had a c-section, or other complications, your body may not be ready for pregnancy so soon after, and you could very well put you are your baby's life in danger. 

I totally agree with the bolded. If I was having issues this pregnancy we would definately be using protection so we did not conceive until at least 1 yr post partum to ensure that baby and I would be healthy! Great points!

pghctwife

1) I have also heard that it is best to wait a year to get pregnant for your body to recover. I got pregnant when my son was 13 months old and they will be 21/22 months apart. So, past that recommendation. Honestly this pregnancy has been easier for me, but I have easy pg in general. 2u2 I dont think is necessarily that big a deal. When you have two that are around a year apart in AGE, that I cant imagine doing myself... but to each their own! I wasnt great about BC to be honest but I BF a lot and didnt get my pd till 8 months, and I dont think I was ovulating until about 10 months.

2) Id suggest trying to think of somehting that means something to you. Im not a fan of picking something just to pick it personally. We have a line from 'you are my sunshine' above the crib. My dad sang that song to me through my childhood and I danced with him to it at my wedding. So it means a lot when I sing it to my son, so it was perfect. Ours says "...and you'll never know, dear, how much we love you..." But it doesnt have to be from a kid thing either. If there is a song or book or poem that means something to you, start there

Mama5181

hohmanam:

I'm sorry, these are two completely different questions, but I figured I would just post both in one thread!
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Secondly, I wanted to do a quote decal above the crib. I have been searching on etsy under "quote decals" "nursery quote decals" and can't find anything that I love. Does anyone have tools for finding good ones, or some advice on a quote for above the crib?

I got some from Lucy Bella Designs that I loved. Google them.

snowkiwi

bearkatjen:

Getting pregnant within a year of having a baby is certainly going to put a toll on your body before you have fully recovered. That may not be a big deal if you had a really healthy pregnancy the first time around. If you were anemic, dealt with high BP, PTL, had a c-section, or other complications, your body may not be ready for pregnancy so soon after, and you could very well put you are your baby's life in danger. 

Well written response above!

In our case, Ellie will be exactly 13.5 months when our DS is born on January 7th by repeat c/s. I did not go on BC after DD's birth but waited until after I had experienced 2 postpartum periods before we actively TTC and it happened in the first month. I had a healthy pregnancy with DD (although I ended up with an emergency c/s due to her getting wound up in her cord and turning to posterior during labour) but my OB has no issues with the babies being so close or with them being both c/s.

brianabrad

Great question and thought above by the other ladies. DH and I also want to have another baby quickly but my biggest concern with them being close together is financial. We need to financially see how much one baby will cost us before we commit to 2u2. For us, daycare cost really decrease once baby hits 2 and enter the toddler room so I have a feeling we will wait till baby girl is 13 to 14 months before we begin actively trying for #2.

sbevmc09

Re: spacing, the thing is, it takes a while for a woman's body to fully recover from growing and birthing a baby.  Yes, you'll be back on your feet relatively quickly, and you'll be back to feeling like yourself in a few weeks or so, but things you can't really see like vitamin stores, etc. take a while to completely normalize and obviously, if you're lacking in something the baby will just take what they need and leave you without things your own body might need or it's even possible you wouldn't be able to support a healthy pregnancy in some situations.  I think that's really why they recommend not having kids back to back. 

Also, nearly 1/3 of babies in this country are born via C/S and it takes a while for things to heal after that (and again, not just talking about you feeling better, like yourself, etc., but to REALLY heal and be safe to stretch out again and that sort of thing) so that's something to consider as well.  I know some doctor's will recommend with a C/S not to have another pregnancy for 2 years (not all doctors say this though) and some doctors also won't consider attempting a VBAC if pregnancies are less than 2 years apart.  All things to consider! 

Traditional children spacing (like looking at the world in general and over time) is 2 1/2 - 3 1/2 years.

pebbleann

I'm a FTM so I can't help you on the first question.

I searched for quotes on google, amazon, etsy and ebay.  I ended up ordering one from wallpops and the other from amazon. GL in your search.

JennV514

My boys will be 18 months apart, both born via c/s. We're all doing fine. Pregnancy takes a toll on your body regardless. Talk with your doctor about this topic.

Little Dawson

I'm going to be having 2 under 2. They will be approx. 16/17 months apart. We didn't use any protection as we were planning/hoping that we could get pregnant sooner rather than later with #2. I was breastfeeding and had my first cycle start again when I was 6 months post partem. Then it only took 2 cycles to get pregnant again! But be aware that your cycle could change and not be like before. I went from having 28 day cycles before to about 35 day cycles while BFing. As long as you've had a healthy pregnancy and birth etc. it's normally no issue to have babies close together. Just make sure to take calcium and magnesium and prenatals to help while BFIng, if you plan to, this will also help when TTC #2!

nattn

After DD was born, my doctor told me she would like me to wait 6 months just for my body to recover. I trust her and 6 months didn't seem too long so we waited.

I got pregnant twice shortly after the 6 months was up and lost both babies. I'm not saying it was because it was too soon, that's something I'll never know, but I wish I hadn't had to go through that while DD was still so young. It made it even worse that I lost the first one right before last Christmas so our holidays were ruined. I never stopped to considered what would happen if I lost a baby and I just wished I had. I'll never get over those losses and I'll always wonder if they happened because my body wasn't recovered enough.

stardust317

My children will be 15 months apart, not planned. I had a c/s with my first, and the only thing my ob ever said was that if I opted for a VBAC then I would be at higher risk of uterine rupture and other complications.

starz57182

I got pregnant with my second when my first was just over 8 months old, and they will be 17 months apart. We wanted them close together, and never used protection, though we didn't really start "trying" until my cycle came back at about 6 months pp. 

I am fine, and none of the doctors in my group have said a word about it, except to say that it seems like a good age gap for kids! Actually, at my first PP appointment, where they talked to me about birth control options, I told them we'd be trying again soon anyway, and no one gave me any warnings.This has actually been a much easier pregnancy than the first (not that it will be for everyone).

That said, my first pregnancy wasn't exactly hard, and I had no major issues, and no surgery. I agree with PP who said that if you had more complications in your first pregnancy, it might be a good idea to give your body more time to recover. At the very least, it would be something to talk to your doctor about.  

this decaf life

https://www.mayoclinic.com/health/family-planning/MY01691

If we have another kid I want them close in age but IMO that's like 2.5 years apart. I want time to enjoy Eloise fully and get her to a point where she doesn't need me as much before I have another baby. There are risks associated with having 2u2 but if you've been healthy this pregnancy & are healthy in general I think it's unlikely you'll have major problems but you'll have to weigh the options with your husband. 

soontobemrs.boulet

Our youngest 2 are 21 months apart and my son and this baby will be 22 months apart. I like the age gap, although I'm not sure there is a "perfect" age gap. I have friends with kids that are 15 months apart and friends with kids that are 5+ years apart and they all have their positives and their own struggles.

As far as wall quotes. Maybe try searching pinterest. I've seen some great ones on there and then searched Etsy for someone that does custom decals.

wootownlady

I had a super healthy pregnancy/vaginal birth with LO #1 and got pregnant (surprise!) by LO #2 when my first child was 10 months old. I have had a easy, healthy, normal second pregnancy (i'm blessed and i know it) ... my OB says I have a decreased risk of a c-section (because I asked about it) for my January birth simply because I have a "proven pelvis" (her words not mine) - we both anticipate that my L&D will be easier/healthy.

I think the OBs (if they are concerned at all) think that two kids born within the same 12 months is the hardest on your body.  My kids will be 19/20 months apart in age.

I agree with PPs about taking more caution if you've had complications/challenges.

GL!