Blended Families

Sunday evening rant

I'll start by mentioning that my annoyance is completely petty and I'm well aware of this. But I'm still kinda pissed and needed an outlet.

BM's transmission went out on her van this weekend. Got it, ish happens. Sucks no matter what. Instead of getting some quotes on repairs or, I don't know....getting it looked at, she up and decides to buy a new car. Calls my FI for advice. First of all - this is something she should be discussing with her FI, not mine. I ask him to end the conversation about it - its not like the 2 of them are making this purchase so his input is completely unneccesary.

BM has a family of 6 at her house. The car she buys seats 5. Ummm....I'm no genius, but the math is off a bit here. Why in the eff would you buy a car that requires another one to get the entire family to 1 place?! Also, getting the kids to school alone legally requies 2 cars now (SS's are 9 and 7, her SD's are 8) since you have to be 12 to ride in the front seat here. And she was well aware of all this when she bought the car.

And.....the (completely ridiculous) reason I'm irritated. She went out and got the exact same car as me, down to the color. If I was a semi-normal person when it comes to cars this might not bother me. But cars are mine and FI 's hobby. We build cars and show them. We strive to be unique. And now BM is riding around town in the same one as me. All the work we've put into mine is evident so they aren't exactly alike thankfully. It shouldn't bother me, but it does. Sigh.

///end rant

BabyFruit Ticker


BabyFetus Ticker

Re: Sunday evening rant

  • Then it makes perfect sense why she called your Fi for advice.  Cars are his thing. 

    You really asked him to end a conversation that didn't suit you??? How rude and immature

    The head gasket is blown on my Audi and its in the garage.  I am not taking it back, DH is fixing it and we are trading up.  I was planning to do it anyhow and now thats its already in the garage it seems like a good time to me.

    The 5 seater definitely makes no sense, if she needs a six seater.

    I guess your Fi advised you and her, hence you have the same car along with the thousands of others who bought that model.

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • She sounds like a nut.  LeAnne Rimes in reverse.  Same car, same color?  Weird.

    BM tried calling DH once also when she bought a car.  It was her weekend with the kids, but she dumped them with a sitter and went car shopping all day, and called DH at 7am to discuss choices with him.  He thought it was very strange since they can't even discuss the kids together that she wanted to talk to him about cars like they were buddies. 

    The front seat issue is really irresponsible.  If you have an attorney, you could have him/her draft a letter on the issue.  Why would she get a car that didn't fit four kids in the back?

     

    Stay at home mom to a house of boys: two amazing stepsons, 12 and 9, and our 4 year old.
  • Loading the player...
  • It makes sense that BM would call FI if cars are his thing... I'm not sure why you're so annoyed/upset with that.

    It does seem really dumb that she bought a car that cannot seat her family. However, does FI car seat the whole family? If yes, I would assume they would just use his car when making family trips. 

    image
  • Neither adult in BM's family has a car that seats over 5 people. They will always have to take 2 cars which isn't gonna be cheap with gas.  And they are trying to adopt a family members baby but that likely won't go through. This is a woman that is always broke. That couldn't afford to fix her vehicle when it was broken and instead but over a grand down and now has car payments. Not the smartest idea.

     And let me clarify the call to FI. It was actually a series of texts throughout the day. It was orginally asking about the van; where to take it etc. which is an understandable discussion.  It morphed into a talk about getting this car...FI advised NO, bad idea (to which she blew off) and then wanted to chat about all the "extras" and financial details. Not neseccary.

    BM knows everything she needs to know about cars. She went to mechanics school and worked in the industry. And she also claimed what I drove was "stupid" less than 2 weeks ago. And now you go out and by the exact same car?! I know me being miffed about that is incredibly petty and I'll own that.

    And yes, I did absolutely ask him to end the converstation. #1 - we were out on a family camping trip trying to spend time together w/ SS's and the rest of the family. #2 - when someone decides to fabricate an event that leads another to jail and causes loss of parental rights (which BM did a couple of years ago), you don't get to be friends afterwards. Talking about the boys, going to school/sports events is one thing. Chatting it up and calling to "brag" is another.

    BabyFruit Ticker


    BabyFetus Ticker
  • imagesweetdreamz6700:

    Neither adult in BM's family has a car that seats over 5 people. They will always have to take 2 cars which isn't gonna be cheap with gas.  And they are trying to adopt a family members baby but that likely won't go through. This is a woman that is always broke. That couldn't afford to fix her vehicle when it was broken and instead but over a grand down and now has car payments. Not the smartest idea.

     And let me clarify the call to FI. It was actually a series of texts throughout the day. It was orginally asking about the van; where to take it etc. which is an understandable discussion.  It morphed into a talk about getting this car...FI advised NO, bad idea (to which she blew off) and then wanted to chat about all the "extras" and financial details. Not neseccary.

    BM knows everything she needs to know about cars. She went to mechanics school and worked in the industry. And she also claimed what I drove was "stupid" less than 2 weeks ago. And now you go out and by the exact same car?! I know me being miffed about that is incredibly petty and I'll own that.

    And yes, I did absolutely ask him to end the converstation. #1 - we were out on a family camping trip trying to spend time together w/ SS's and the rest of the family. #2 - when someone decides to fabricate an event that leads another to jail and causes loss of parental rights (which BM did a couple of years ago), you don't get to be friends afterwards. Talking about the boys, going to school/sports events is one thing. Chatting it up and calling to "brag" is another.

    OK this is totally different than she called and they are talking cars while you are standing there demanding he hang up.

    If BM fabricated a story that led to your DH being jailed they need to solely communicate through attorneys.

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • I agree with the other PPs who said she called your FI for good reason and you should butt out. It's not like she was calling him asking him back....

    I also have to wonder if her FI's other car seats more than 5. We have a 7 passenger (there are 7 of us) and a 5 passenger car. The big one is our family car. The other car is still big enough to transport either DH, me, DD and DS around (those of us that live in our house FT) or DH and my SKs. We have been without our family car for short periods of time and while it's not ideal, it happens.

    Now if both cars do not fit everyone, then there is a problem. My brother has never owned a car big enough to hold his whole family. He had a 4 passenger when they had 6 in their family and now have a 5 passenger when they have 7 in their family. My sister ends up picking up half of his family for family functions because he doesn't have room in his vehicle. The rest of the time he doesn't take the teenagers anywhere, just the youngest 2 or sometimes the middle kid. But my brother is all kinds of screwed up so....

    DD(14),SD(13),SS(11),SS(9),DS(3)

  • I can really relate to both of these issues; DH and BM get along best they can but it isn't unusual for BM to have outbursts and call DH names, etc.  She will then turn around and call DH for advice on items and it totally annoys me.  Nothing realting to SD - things that could be asked of so many other people than DH.  DH will answer her question and make it short, but I could see if we were spending time together with the family how easy it would be to ask him to get off the phone.

     Also, the car issue happened with members in my family and people just laughed at the one who bought the same car/color.  Really - of ALL the choices out there; the exact same one?  Yeah - you have reasons to be annoyed - and this is the place to vent about things like this!

This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"