I feel really bad for DH:Updated

lovebug33 · September 2012

So, MIL is still here. She is basically treating us like a hotel. She sleeps, wakes up and demands food and drink, and then leaves the house to do different things. She rarely picks up the baby and just talks non-stop. Yesterday, DH started crying because he was expecting her to love all over our baby (I was expecting that too), and she is so not. He wanted a completely different experience and he is not getting it. I feel really bad for him. I wish she would act like a normal person.

Update: DH actually stood up to her this afternoon as she was leaving at 12:00 to spend the rest of the day with her friends. He asked if she came to see us or to spend time away. She left anyway. Tonight, Boo smiled and laughed for the first time. She could have been here to see it and I wish she had because my parents get all the firsts because they live here. This could have been DH's one first with his family. It just makes me sad that she is this way. But, at least DH is seeing her like I have all along and gets my frustration. And, I am sad she missed out on the fun.

TJ1979 · September 2012

Oh I know how you feel! MH's dad didn't come meet E until she was 6 weeks old, and didn't even try to hold or touch her. Finally before they left, SMIL made him hold her. He kind of held her far away from himself. Not a cuddle or coo or anything. I know MH was hurt that he didn't come sooner and wasn't affectionate at all. But he's just not that kind of person.
At least you're halfway through her visit. Sorry she's being such a pain.

jessager · September 2012

I'm so sorry to hear this...makes no sense to me that she's acting that way like she's jealous of the baby

Dragonfly1226 · September 2012

DH's parents never came out to visit when P was born. They didn't meet him until we flew out there when P was 5 months old. Then once we were there they pretty much spent all their time judging everything we did. It was awful. It hurt dh's feelings and mine too. I am so sorry hon. (((((hugs)))))

mystic_J · September 2012

Based on what information you've shared with us about her, this isn't all that surprising. While I'm sure it's hard for your DH to come to terms with that, maybe some good can come from this and your DH will have an easier time standing up to her in the future. Just trying to find a silver lining here since its doubtful she will change.

ChattyCathy81 · September 2012

Goodness... why did she even bother coming? Your poor DH. That's really, really sad.

drubie · September 2012

I'm so sorry this has been such an awful experience for you - the terrible issues leading up to her visit, and now crappiness on top of what you already expected! Lean on each other, and stay strong in your own love for your babe.

SweetyPy17 · September 2012

Oh honey, Im sorry. I wish I could give you some great advice other than tell her to f off, but that will just make things worse. All you can do is put a smile on and know that in 3 days, she'll be gone. Hang in there. It's almost over.

BeccaLandes · October 2012

having kids really brought up a lot of issues my husband has with his family that he had pushed aside or ignored for most of his life. it is really complicated. somehow we can rationalize why our parents aren't good to us, but it is hurtful to see them neglect our beautiful new children.