Baby cries when she sees grandma?
DD is a good baby and rarely cries... she gets fussy, but doesnt cry often. However since Sunday, anytime our DD sees or even hears my MIL, she starts screaming at the top of her lungs and cries. All four times this week that it has happened, she has been perfectly fine, cooing and smiling with me, DH, FIL or content with herself, but when MIL walked in the room she started.... Yesterday was the worse. We left her with my MIL and FIL while we mowed grass. After 10 min my FIL walked up to our house to tell me I needed to come get her. They couldnt calm her down after MIL walked into the den.
We cant figure it out. She isnt like that with anyone else. both my mom and MIL watch DD while we are working. And my older sister watched her while we went grocery shopping last weekend. For some reason its just my MIL she gets so upset with. My MIL is VERY tenderhearted and she is so upset and depressed saying her granddaughter hates her. DH, myself, FIL, and my BIL all tried to convince her that shes just a baby and she doesnt hate her, but she is still so upset. She was crying this AM as well still upset over LO crying when she sees her.
Any suggestions on reasoning behind LO cries, or what to tell MIL to help her get over it?
The only thing we can think of, is that DD doesnt like to be held, and that when she watches her she tries to hold her all day while I'm at work, and she associate s MIL with being held and "trapped"
Re: Baby cries when she sees grandma?
I was going to suggest maybe she didn't like her scent as well....
BFP: 10/27/2011 | EDD: 6/30/12
DS born 6/28/12 via C/S
TTC #2: September 2018
Me: 36 | DH: 39
Mirena removed 9/13/2018 after 6 years
BFP 11/11/2018 | MC @ 5.5 weeks on Thanksgiving
July 2019 - Diagnosed with Secondary Unexplained IF
August 2019 - 2.5 mg of Letrozole = Never Ovulated so Trigger and IUI were cancelled
9/30/2019 - IUI #1 (5 mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFP but Betas showed CP @ 4 weeks
10/28/2019 - IUI #2 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Trigger) = BFN
11/25/2019 - IUI #3 (7.5mg of Letrozole, Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
12/24/2019 - IUI #4 (7.5mg of Letrozole + Crinone after IUI) = BFN
1/24/2020 - IUI #5 (50mg of Clomid + Trigger + Crinone after IUI) = BFN and an Ovarian Cyst
3/2/2020 - Taking a break to reset/NTNP
11/1/2020 - At peace with where things are in life and are no long actively TTC. Whatever happens will happen and it will all be okay.
No MIL is a very soft spoken petite lady. And she cant stand the smell of perfumes, lotions, or airfreshners b/c of her allergies.
That would be so hard! Some day this will be a good story, but gosh it must suck for your MIL right now. Have you mentioned to your MIL that maybe your DD might like it if she just focused on PLAYING with her instead of holding her? Another idea is for you to allow MIL to hold your DD while you're in the room. When your DD cries, talk to her in an upbeat, calm voice from across the room. "You're okay! Grandma has you! Grandma loves you and you are just fine!!!" Obviously, you don't have to leave your baby to scream for an hour, but the idea is to show your baby that you feel okay with where she is at. Everyone in the room should be very relaxed and positive.
If nothing else works, I would just remind MIL that how your DD is at 2 mo. is not how she will be at a year, or 2 or 5, or 17. It's only a matter of time before your DD absolutely adores her.
yeah we have told her that DD doesnt like being held. She wont even let hold her except when she nurses. Now MIL cant even be in the same room and it crushes her... and me. I hate seeing her so upset.
We have tried 2 tell her its just a phase and she'll get over it. DH even told her that maybe DD had a nightmare and she was the first thing DD saw and maybe DD associates her with her nightmare.
But only MIL takes offense and gets sad about it because she has two other grandsons that she watches everyday but we only see her once a week at most due to distance and they never had a recognition issue with her. I think they will eventually get over this phase. Your LO might have just associated something bad with her. I say keep trying to keep LO around her with you or H around to help soothe.
Thanks guys. I do agree that she is horrible at reading little ones cues. She always thinks LO is cold or hungry or something, even when shes just sleepy.
We will try to spend the weekend with them so LO can be around all of us so maybe she wont freak out with MIL. I just got off the phone with MIL. She still sounds really upset. I can still tell shes been crying.
My DS cries when my mom tries to "play" with him. She makes loud noises and talks loudly in a high pitched voice.
It scares him to the point where he's hysterical, but she insists he's crying because "He's hungry, he has gas, etc"... and denies that it could possibly be her voice.
He NEVER cries that loudly otherwise... he just makes fussy whining noises when he's super hungry or has a very full diaper... but with my mom, he screams like he's in pain!