(Untitled)

Amores0121

tamararachel2

I know this topic is probably over, but I wanted to post anyways. I totally know about the deadbeat dad thing. My XH sounds pretty similar to your X. We had a up and down relationship from the beginning of dating and we got married just because we thought it was the right thing to do. We ended up splitting right before our 2 year wedding anniversary for a year and right as he got the divorce papers started, we decided to give it another go for DS' sake and to see if we could make it work. That only lasted a few months and then he ended up packing his truck up with his stuff and then left. We came up with our own agreement when we got a separation agreement and I thought he was going to be a grown-up and it would work even when I was living in NC and he was in FL. However, he hardly ever called DS and his excuse was because DS was only 3 and wouldn't hold a phone conversation. He never sent any money, but I couldn't do anything until we got something down on paper. I ended up moving to VA and finally got a legal separation and he started paying some money, but still would only call once or twice a month. In the past year, DS has seen his BD once and hasn't talked to him in over a month. BD also has missed 3 payments of his CS. DS knows he has a daddy, but never asks about him and basically sees my FI as that father-role figure. I don't keep DS from BD, he just never makes the effort to get a hold of him. BD knows nothing about DS.

I'm already worried about the upcoming holidays. BD is supposed to get DS for the Christmas break which is only 2 weeks, but it will be over a year that DS has seen BD by then. I just feel DS going all the way to FL is a long way for a little boy who doesn't even know who his real dad is. I know I agreed on this, but that was also when BD was being a grown-up and not a child. I am going to talk to someone about some options if BD keeps going at this rate. 

TheBuddha

SueBear:

I agree that if you want to file for custody you don't want any proof that you kept DD from him.nbsp;
However, you are certainly entitled to have other plans.nbsp; "Sunday doesn't work for me.nbsp; In the future, please provide me with more time to plan, especially during a busy holiday weekend.nbsp; In addition, you need to arrange your own transportation."nbsp; You can text that.nbsp; There is no reason you need to phone.nbsp;
nbsp;

Better yet...email it. Then print it out and file it away. You need to have proof in court that you tried and he did not. Document document document.

Amores0121

You're right, e-mail would be the best solution...except he doesn't have a computer! Yeah he sold his laptop and just about everything else he owned b/c he has no clue how to manage $. I know he goes on FB through his phone though...i see him liking his other daughter's pics.

 I never heard back from him. DD started her first day of kindergarten yesterday and her own dad couldn't even be bothered to call and find out about it.  Does he know it was her first day? Maybe not, but he knows this is the yr. she starts kindergarten. I wanted to call him and and ask him why, how he could do such a thing to her, but I stopped myself. My FI was there and that was just fine for her. She didn't even mention her "dad".