It may be way to early to think about this, but....
I was just reading a comment on the Pampers board that said that the longer that you leave your LO in a pee diaper, the harder it will be to potty train them. Makes sense.... If they get used to feeling the pee diaper, they won't know any different, right?
What are your thoughts?
I ask this because I am having a slight issue with my babysitter not changing Owen enough. I have been counting diapers (yes, I am that mom) and she is only using 3 diapers in an 8 hour period (on most days). I don't think this is nearly enough. I know that when he is home with us, we change him alot...maybe too much.
I have tried to beat around the bush about it being super passive agressive, but I think that I may have to come out and say something. Is my thinking right? Is 3 diapers all day that he is there to little? Am I over reacting? If it doesn't bother him (as in he hardly ever gets rashes), should it bother me?
Re: It may be way to early to think about this, but....
My daycare does changes on a schedule of every 2 hours and also as needed in between. He goes through about 5 diapers in 8 hours when he's there. If I'm home with him, I probably change him once an hour, more if he poops. If I had one person caring for just my child, I think I'd specifically ask her to change him on my schedule, too but since daycare is obviously fewer people and more babies, I understand the schedule that they keep.
So, ultimately, yes, I'd ask her to change him more often if it's what you want. Potty training or not, I don't think it's ever a bad idea to be in a dry diaper over a wet one!
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Stupid mobile app... That's 2 to 3, and 7 to 8.
haha, I figured.
So why in the world would you count diapers if LO isn't getting rashes or any reason other then to be on top of your babysitter like a hawk.... I sure wouldn't ever want to work for you! Do you not trust your sitter? Do you check every possible trash can and dig for them? Does she stay strictly at home...what if she throws some away while at park, mall, playgroups etc. I used to be a nanny and I would be annoyed as hell if a Mom came to me with this, because how do you really know for sure... your not there.
Now, if he is not getting rashes she is doing nothing wrong, I change DS every 2-3 hrs I suppose, my girlfriend changes her twins when they are FULL, and I mean full to the point of leaking (poopy diapers right away) Some people do it differently and unless you tell her point blank that is how you want it done, how the heck would she know. It is all about good communication with having someone else care for your child....because they are not you and might do things a little diff (but in no way means it is "wrong") it would be wrong if your LO has rashes and she still keeps him in a dirty diaper.
Do it nicely and don't tell her you count the diapers... that would make me want to leave fast!
and for crying out loud...a diaper log? That is like saying I don't trust you to do things the "right" way.... "your way"
If anything, say you are sad to miss the things that go on during the day...and can she make a daily "our fun adventure" log... noting feeding times (solids and amt of bottle), tummy time, stories, LO's cute reactions (or something cute LO did that day) nap times, poopy vs wet diapers. This way you know in case LO gets sick in the night etc you can know how the day went.... That is something I did automatically for the parents back in my day so I wouldn't have to stand there and chat for a half hr after I was off filling them in if I had to leave. Sounds like a lot to record but it is actually really fast.
I hate to say I agree with all of this. I don't even send more than 3-4 diapers with my DS for his 10 hours with the babysitter because I don't think it's necessary to change a diaper until it's full (I don't go as far as leaky, but I don't change after every squirt).
If you want your sitter to do something specific, be kind and gracious and ask directly so she doesn't feel attacked. She's not doing anything wrong, just not the way you want.
The standard daycare procedure is to change every two hours (more if needed). I worked DC for so long it's just second nature now. 3 diapers in 8 hours is definitely pushing it.
ETA: I think that you should ask the sitter to keep a log of feedings, changings, ect like was suggested by a pp. However, I don't really think that you are really over reacting. Just go about telling her politely. Since he is your child you really should have a say in how he is cared for. That is what you are paying this person to do.
Stop being so nice (well not really, just be more direct)! She's your employee and you have specific ways you want you child taken care of. Tell her what they are. Ask her to keep a log if that's what you need to keep track of things. You shouldn't have to explain to her why you want a log (although explanations are nice but don't have to be sugar coated).
It's lovely to have a "relationship" with your sitter, but you're paying her to do a job. A very important job. If you were managing employees at a company you would be a very inefficient manager if you tried to get them to do their job by being passive aggressive instead of TELLING them what the right way to do that job is.
Forget how often other people change their kids' diapers. You want you kid changed every two hours, then your kid should be changed every two hours. If she can't do it, find a different sitter.
OK, you can all flame me now.
No flame here. I agree. I worked DC and babysat/nannied for years. If my parents didn't tell me what they wanted I didn't know. I wanted them to be as clear as possible. I was close with several families I worked with but I still worked for them. It doesn't have to become a strained relatioship just because there are expectations.
I started counting diapers because everytime he came home his diaper was full full full. I completely trust my daycare provider with my child, if I didn't...I would be long gone. I just think that she is in a diaper changing rotation with the other kids that are 2-3 years old and they don't go as much so don't need to be changed as much. I was simply asking if I was over reacting and apparently, you think so.
I am so glad that you told me to be nice about it... I was planning on going in there and cussing the woman that watches my child. Point noted.
Flame away...but I was asking for an honest opinion and although I appreciate yours, I don't see where you should be so rude about it.
And thank you for putting it so nicely. I do see where you are coming from. I really like my babysitter. I don't want her to change him after every squirt...that would be a serious waste of time and diapers. But I do think that 4 in an 8 hour period would be good.
Thanks for the insight. I really do appreciate it.
Oh hunny, I am not flaming just being honest... You would know if I was flaming. You said you "were that type of Mom" that counts diapers, which VERY much made it seem like you watch over your babysitters every move.... and I SO have known those Mom's. If you pick up LO and diaper is very full, ask her while you are changing him prior to leaving how often he generally gets changed throughout the day, and you will leave more diapers so he can get changed more often throughout the day so the diapers don't end so full. If you don't like it, say something... but don't be "that Mom" that is obnoxiously counting diapers and thinking the sitter is doing it wrong. I wouldn't want to pick up my son with a full diaper at all, and if it happened all the time I would say something right then.
Isn't this what daycares do? I SAH, but I know some of my friends that work get a changing log, or a potty log now that the kiddos are older and potty training. I just don't see how its a big deal to request your sitter do something like that. `
I SAH as well and only have nanny experience in the past (worked for 1 family with their kids in their home) so I don't know what goes on in DC. My experience comes from that... as I read OP's org. post it seemed as if her sitter was at her house (how else do you count diapers, unless you keep track of how many you send out I suppose...and count at end of each day amt left??) If that is how it is at all DC, by all means ask to start a "diaper log"
I SAH as well and only have nanny experience in the past (worked for 1 family with their kids in their home) so I don't know what goes on in DC. My experience comes from that... as I read OP's org. post it seemed as if her sitter was at her house (how else do you count diapers, unless you keep track of how many you send out I suppose...and count at end of each day amt left??) If that is how it is at all DC, by all means ask to start a "diaper log"
We ask our nanny to keep a log with all sorts of info: when he went down for naps, how long he slept, when he ate, what he ate, how many pee diapers, and how many poopy diapers. We don't ask her to keep this log because we don't trust her, but rather so we can keep track of his patterns and any CHANGES in patterns. If he gets sick suddenly and has to go to the pediatrician's office, I need to know if he hasn't had the right amount of dirty diapers lately, or if he hasn't been eating as much, because it could give us clues as to what the problem is.
Unfortunately for us working parents, we DON'T always know what our chidren's day looks like, so I have to rely on my nanny to give me accurate info. Not checking up on the nanny, but just need to know these things about my baby...
3 diapers does sound too little in a 8 hour period. Our DC checks/changes every 2hrs so usually DD has about 4-5 diapers changes and bm diapers are changed right away. However when we are home I do not change every 2 hrs, I change her when she needs to be changed, and she sttn so I don't wake her to change.
Sorry. This is the funniest post I have read in a while.
No, I have never ever heard of it being harder to potty train if your LO gets used to a wet diaper.
I am on my 2nd baby and I have no clue how many diapers she wears a day. When its pretty full, I change it on the weekends. With poop, right away. Maybe your LO doesn't have full diapers every 2 hours?
If it is that important, say something. But my kids are both in daycare, and I don't track every move- they are well cared for, gain weight nicely, and happy. I honestly have no idea what they eat on a daily basis. My LO come home always with dry diapers though- they change her right before I come.
Maybe I am a weird working mom but the only way I can function is to let the people I trust care for my child. Don't get me wrong- I do say things if I don't like the way they are doing something.
My 3 year old son hated being wet. We had to change him every single time he wet, about every 20 minutes. It was ridiculous. The pedi about died when I told him how many diapers we go through and said I only needed to change him about every 1.5-2 hours. Well, DS wouldn't have it so we kept on changing him right away. He was the most difficult kid to potty train. We tried every method. He only just got it this week.
On another note: you shouldn't be passive aggressive with your childcare provider (or anyone ever for that matter), be direct. Your the boss. It's good practice for the future. And, people are idiots. Being passive aggressive and/or beating around the bush just enables their idiocy.
EDIT: You're the boss. Sheesh, I'm ashamed of myself.
This was nicely put. My DC provides me a daily sheet of nap times, feeding times, diaper wets/poop, what my daughter did all day and her mood for the day. Being a working parent I find this extremely helpful so I can keep my daughter on some sort of routine during the weekend.
Um, did you not read my entire entry? It will look bad if she ask solely for a diaper log esp after being so passive aggressive... plus all daily info. is better then just 1 thing