please help: Not potty trained & Preschool starts soon

Seatownbride2B

Hi- can anyone recommend some tips? My 3 yr old is refusing to use the potty. He is capable but fighting the power of wills (to show he's in control).  School starts in 2 weeks! He can have accidents at school, but has to be willing!

 I've done reward system--nothing seems to work, he wont sit on the potty. if bare bottomed he pees on the rug or furniture. Should I just put him in undies and let him have accidents for a week? TIA

EricsTrueLove2

Seatownbride2B:

Should I just put him in undies and let him have accidents for a week? TIA

YES! You have two weeks left and if you've tried all else try this. I know it's not ideal for you but this really works.

2Gma

Don't "fight" him on it.  He will win.  If possible I would let him wet his undies...he most likely will stop when he decides he doesn't like wearing wet clothes.  He might simply not be ready to potty train yet either so you might want to talk to the school about his progress.  Both of my DD's weren't potty trained until 3y3m and I had tried everything!  One day it simply clicked.  Good luck!

LoveEeyore

EricsTrueLove2:

Seatownbride2B:

Should I just put him in undies and let him have accidents for a week? TIA

YES! You have two weeks left and if you've tried all else try this. I know it's not ideal for you but this really works.

Yes, yes, yes!  Tips:

Make clean up take a loooooooooong time.  Have him help/watch you clean the carpet be poky.  Have him go in the bathroom and peel off all the wet clothes by him self.  Stay in the bathroom during this, then take a really long time to clean him up and have him dress himself without any help once he's cleaned up.  It is a real drag to interrupt toddler business.

Help yourself to an m&m everytime you pee on the potty.

Give DH an M&M for going on the potty.

NEVER let him see you mad, frustrated or annoyed at the 30th accident of the day.  Let him believe you couldn't care less. 

Good luck!  Take away the urgency, take away the power he has over you over it.

VTbride05

Help yourself to an m&m everytime you pee on the potty.

Give DH an M&M for going on the potty.

NEVER let him see you mad, frustrated or annoyed at the 30th accident of the day.  Let him believe you couldn't care less. 

 

Love the M&M ideas!! And great reminder!

chloephoebecali

Underwear under a diaper feels gross, too.  That is what I did when I had to run errands while still not totally changed.  If you really can't handle the mess, you can see if that gets him moving.

Mrs.Greg

chloephoebecali:

Underwear under a diaper feels gross, too. nbsp;That is what I did when I had to run errands while still not totally changed. nbsp;If you really can't handle the mess, you can see if that gets him moving.

We put undies on under a pull up when we left the house when DD1 was starting to potty train. She wet once and never did it again. She only had to wear the wet undies and pull up for like 20 minutes, we were on our way home, but that was plenty!

KathrynMD

I wouldn't bully or shame your LO into potty training.  If he's ready, but he's fighting you on it, stop fighting him.  I would just drop it, but remind him he has to wear undies at preschool and then put him in undies when he goes.  He's likely to have accidents the first day or two, but he won't be the only one.  There will be positive peer pressure to go with the other kids and not be "messy"

jlw2505

Sorry but from my experience in potty training with my 2 kids unless your child wants to do it, its not going to happen.  You already know the issue - its a power thing.  At age 3, this is one of the few things he has control over and he is using it.  I personally would stop mentioning it and see what happens.  The more you push this right now, the more he is going to push back and have accidents.  Can you send him to preschool in pullups so he can still go by himself (and clean himself up even if he accidents) but he won't make a huge mess?  You can try to force him by putting him in undies but honestly, if he is anything like my younger DD, it won't make a difference and he won't care if he pees on himself.  If you are stressed about it and making a huge deal about it - he is not going to do it and nothing you do will change that.

ridesbuttons

EricsTrueLove2:

Seatownbride2B:

Should I just put him in undies and let him have accidents for a week? TIA

YES! You have two weeks left and if you've tried all else try this. I know it's not ideal for you but this really works.

Yes.

No battles.  No power struggle.  You do not lose your cool.

neverblushed

My DS went to the first 6 weeks of preschool with a pull-up on.  He was a young 3.  He wasn't the only kid in his class still wearing a pull-up or having occasional accidents.

 

chloephoebecali

Mrs.Greg:

chloephoebecali:

Underwear under a diaper feels gross, too. nbsp;That is what I did when I had to run errands while still not totally changed. nbsp;If you really can't handle the mess, you can see if that gets him moving.

We put undies on under a pull up when we left the house when DD1 was starting to potty train. She wet once and never did it again. She only had to wear the wet undies and pull up for like 20 minutes, we were on our way home, but that was plenty!

I tell everyone this little trick!  It worked great for us, too. 

ghdst1

EricsTrueLove2:

Seatownbride2B:

Should I just put him in undies and let him have accidents for a week? TIA

YES! You have two weeks left and if you've tried all else try this. I know it's not ideal for you but this really works.

agreed.  With boys it is better when they have underwear on because then they really get wet and it is unpleasant.  Easier for them to learn that going on potty is better.