ok - so blatant, sneaky lying has started. . . how to handle (mini novel. .. )

KathrynMD

I might have asked this before (or on the preschool board?) and the basic advice I got was just to not give DD alot of chances to lie - so don't set her up to lie and I've tried to do that - and ignore or humor her as appropriate.

Well - we've had two blatant lies in the last week or so.

#1 - over the weekend, she asked for some cookies and I told her she could have 2, but needed to sit down and eat them.  I let her pick the 2 she wanted and set her up at the counter and letf the open packet of oreos on the kitchen counter (behind where she was sitting).  I left the room to go put some laundry away, came back a few minutes later and she was hunched over in her seat.  I thought she was hurt or playing a game, so I said what are you doing and she said "nothing" and then I saw a cookie piece in her lap and then saw she had re-opened the packet of cookies.  I asked her if she got another cookie and she said no - and then I asked why she had a cookie in her hand and she said she just wanted to have another bite of a cookie.  I didn't make a big deal about b/c her friend was coming over for a playdate in a few minutes and I knew it would become a major deal - but geez man, sneaky!

#2 - this morning, we went upstairs to get dressed.  I left DD in her room w/ a dress, shoes and socks and underwear and told her to take off her nightgown and pull up and start getting dressed.  She normally needs some reminders/help w/ getting dressed but does it on her own.  I was brushing my teeth and called out to ask her what she was doing and she said "I'm getting dressed" so I just went ahead and started getting dressed myself.  Then, I look in her room - and she hasn't done ANYTHING, she's busy humping her blanket (LOL!) - she totally lied to me.  I repeated to her to get dressed, etc. and she finally got going with it. 

I really don't knwo what to do about the lying. .. . I don't think I should overlook it, but I don't want to overreact either and freak out about a fairly normally development.

lauranne

We have done something similar to LLHR.  Aiden goes in phases.  It's like he realizes "wow, lying is bad and I get in serious trouble when I do it" so he's great for a week or two.  Then he forgets and does it again.  And it's always a really bad lie!  Just stay consistent, talk about it afterwards, etc.  It can definitely be challenging and frustrating!

mrs. remy

I like LLHR's approach and we will probably handle things in a similar matter. The lying has also started for us, but so far it'll be something like he wets his pants because he is too engrossed in playing with something to take a bathroom break, and when I ask "did you pee your pants?" he will say "No!! I did NOT" even though the front of him is all wet and he clearly did.