Angry vent: my poor sister

Stormy8881

I am so mad I could spit! So long story...

My older sister met a guy a little over 2 years ago and started dating him after a tool used her for a year. She is a nurse but has really low self esteem and used to have an eating disorder. That being said, her new boyfriend treated her really well and though she is religious and he is anti-religion, they got along great otherwise. So after 6 months of dating his work moved him to Korea. Rather than break up, after he was there for 6 months she made a hard decision to quit her nursing job and go to Korea to teach english for a year. I told her to go...she has had some amazing experiences traveling to other places she never would have (like Japan, China, Bali, Philippines, Thailand, and of course Korea). While I don't want her to follow a guy around, she got to do things she never would have if she had not gone....I really think it helped her open up. She has been there for a year and was suppose to come back to the US to her old nursing job in September. And now her boyfriend just broke up with her. Basically they had a fight about religion and he said she would have to change if they were to stay together. While I understand he doesn't believe in anything specific and doesn't want to be converted the guy can't even have a simple conversation about religion without acting like an angry 5 year old. He gets mad cause she goes to bible study. She has not asked him to become religious but just to keep an open mind and understand that her faith is important to her. He just decided he has had enough and broke up with her. He also had the nerve to say she is the reason he has been so unhappy over the past year.

What an a**hole. She has given more than she should into the relationship and he is being a jerk. Even if they were to break up over their religious differences (which my sister has said it might come to that someday - though she was currently happy and just wanted to wait and see if they could maybe come to a compromise in the future), he really didn't need to dump her a month before she leaves for home and say hurtful things. So now my depressed sister is alone in Korea....I hope she changes her flight to come home asap rather than in September and she gets over this jerk.....but I know she won't. I wish I could fly over there and kick his butt, 9 months pregnant. UGH. end vent.

mollyxcate

That is awful! Seriously. I would understand him breaking up with her if she was constantly trying to force a religion he didn't believe in on him but not because she just wants him to be open minded. Faith is a very personal thing.

But on that note if he can't understand that then hes probably not mature enough for a relationship like that. I hope your sister finds someone who treats her better when she gets home! I'm sorry you can't be with her right now. 

Rhenna

It's probably best that this happened when it did.  She is already planning on coming home.  At least it didn't happen in the first few months of her moving there.  Hopefully she moves up her coming home date.

LMB1231

My sister is dating a guy that is a different religion then she is and constantly reminds her "I'm not converting". He's good enough to go with her to her church and asks questions and stuff but the constant commentary of "I'm not converting" gets old. We get it dude, we know. My family is the least pushy family I've ever seen and I'm pretty sure no one even ASKED you to convert. Sometimes I think being anti-religion is like a religion to some people.It just seems like a waste of energy to me. Personally when I don't like something, I just don't do it.

It hurts your heart when stuff happens to your sister, I know I have had those moments. Hang in there and I don't think anyone could really blame you if you went off on this loser! 

Stormy8881

Thanks for the kind thoughts. I agree that it is probably a good thing. She would never have the confidence to break up with him and I don't think the relationship would ever end up being what she needed. He has been moody and constantly says her unhappiness makes him unhappy, which confused her cause she isn't and hasn't been unhappy. He has come across as selfish and is more interested in traveling and having "him time." He isn't ready or mature enough for a serious commited relationship where he has to sometimes compromise. I just hope they both just realize that and not get back together! He is taking a week of vacation soon (and chose to travel out of the country even though he only had 2 more weeks to spend with his girlfriend before she moves away) and I hope she gets an early flight and peaces out of there while he is gone. I hate it when girls do this and don't realize they deserve better.