Please Explain Abt the "R" word

TunaTown

I don't use the word [but when I do it's typically in conversation btw my DH and me when it's just the two of us - and it's usually me calling him that]. I never use the word in public b/c so many people are offended by it.

However, I'm not sure why people are so offended.

Please explain.

Libby1978

What is the "R" word?

annaruiz2

If your husband was doing some kind of house chore, say the dishes, would you jokingly refer to him as your n.igger?

NotSharknado

Well I think it's because a lot of times it's meant as an insult when used. Like you and your dh. You're calling him a r***** because you mean he's mentally challenged. So it's adding to the stigma that it's a bad thing to be disabled. My son is undergoing tests for autism and it certainly offends me.

CoffeeBeen

Do you really not get it?  Because retarded used to refer to mentally handicapped people, substituting it for negative words like dumb/stupid/ridiculous is tantamount to calling mentally handicapped people dumb/stupid/ridiculous. 

If you mean dumb/stupid/ridiculous then say that and leave a vulnerable population out of it.

ETA: grammar 

Lilystar82

https://www.r-word.org/

 Its derogatory. It's like using gay or a racial slur.  It's unbelievably offensive. As the group it refers to happen to be amazing, outstanding, unique people. Just have different chromosomes. 

ShellShockedMama

I've accidentally said it before and I am very diligent in not using it. it is because it is derogatory to an entire population of people, such as the term "he jewed me down to a cheap price" or "man, I was totally gypped by ABC tires.".

there are other words that dont put down a population/religion/culture of people. we don't need these aforementioned negative words to make a point. 

Libby1978

Oh.  That "R" word. 

Well, I don't know about you, but if I had a child with mental retardation I'd be a little upset if I heard people throwing that word around as a cut-down.

MissNikki007

annaruiz2:

If your husband was doing some kind of house chore, say the dishes, would you jokingly refer to him as your n.igger?

Yes.

robinsokj

MissNikki007:

annaruiz2:

If your husband was doing some kind of house chore, say the dishes, would you jokingly refer to him as your n.igger?

Yes.

Hey, thanks for the mid day choking

LuckyDad

CoffeeBeen:

Do you really not get it?  Because retarded used to refer to mentally handicapped people, substituting it for negative words like dumb/stupid/ridiculous is tantamount to calling mentally handicapped people dumb/stupid/ridiculous. 

If you mean dumb/stupid/ridiculous then say that and leave a vulnerable population out of it.

ETA: grammar 

Technically "dumb" is a medical condition. Arguably it is offensive to a mute person.

MissNikki007

robinsokj:

MissNikki007:

annaruiz2:

If your husband was doing some kind of house chore, say the dishes, would you jokingly refer to him as your n.igger?

Yes.

Hey, thanks for the mid day choking

lol

CoffeeBeen

MissNikki007:

annaruiz2:

If your husband was doing some kind of house chore, say the dishes, would you jokingly refer to him as your n.igger?

Yes.

LOL

annaruiz2

MissNikki007:

annaruiz2:

If your husband was doing some kind of house chore, say the dishes, would you jokingly refer to him as your n.igger?

Yes.

So I can refer to you as that?

TunaTown

annaruiz2:

If your husband was doing some kind of house chore, say the dishes, would you jokingly refer to him as your n.igger?

No, I actually call him my House B!tch.

TunaTown

annaruiz2:

MissNikki007:

annaruiz2:

If your husband was doing some kind of house chore, say the dishes, would you jokingly refer to him as your n.igger?

Yes.

So I can refer to you as that?

*quietly hands the flaming of this thread over to annaruiz2*

 

stilts1

annaruiz2:

MissNikki007:

annaruiz2:

If your husband was doing some kind of house chore, say the dishes, would you jokingly refer to him as your n.igger?

Yes.

So I can refer to you as that?

Oh no.  You didn't just go there...

michaels_girl

annaruiz2:

MissNikki007:

annaruiz2:

If your husband was doing some kind of house chore, say the dishes, would you jokingly refer to him as your n.igger?

Yes.

So I can refer to you as that?

*holds hand out for missnikki's earrings*

 

Karschingham

EllaHella:

robinsokj:

MissNikki007:

annaruiz2:

If your husband was doing some kind of house chore, say the dishes, would you jokingly refer to him as your n.igger?

Yes.

Hey, thanks for the mid day choking

sweet tea came out my nose.

 

HAHAHAHAA not only is she growing a penis but she also has ballz! I like yo style...

ShellShockedMama

stilts1:

annaruiz2:

MissNikki007:

annaruiz2:

If your husband was doing some kind of house chore, say the dishes, would you jokingly refer to him as your n.igger?

Yes.

So I can refer to you as that?

Oh no.  You didn't just go there...

DO NOT FEED THE TROLL!!  

NotSharknado

annaruiz2:

MissNikki007:

annaruiz2:

If your husband was doing some kind of house chore, say the dishes, would you jokingly refer to him as your n.igger?

Yes.

So I can refer to you as that?

Seriously?

NotSharknado

ShellShockedMama:

stilts1:

annaruiz2:

MissNikki007:

annaruiz2:

If your husband was doing some kind of house chore, say the dishes, would you jokingly refer to him as your n.igger?

Yes.

So I can refer to you as that?

Oh no.  You didn't just go there...

DO NOT FEED THE TROLL!!  

Some sh!t just can't be ignored.

michaels_girl

instead of playing with the troll, let's gif this bi1tch out!

first i was like

then i was like

then i was like

 

RayRay007

LuckyDad:

CoffeeBeen:

Do you really not get it?  Because retarded used to refer to mentally handicapped people, substituting it for negative words like dumb/stupid/ridiculous is tantamount to calling mentally handicapped people dumb/stupid/ridiculous. 

If you mean dumb/stupid/ridiculous then say that and leave a vulnerable population out of it.

ETA: grammar 

Technically "dumb" is a medical condition. Arguably it is offensive to a mute person.

Yeah, I was just gonna say.

ShellShockedMama

but you're giving a know troll, who wants to stir stuff up, exactly what she wants. you're not going to educate her on anything or make her stop. 

obviously I dont support what she said but she's a troll. that's what tthey do. they only go away if you ignore them.  

annaruiz2

I just think that saying a person can't use a word because they are white isn't that far off from telling someone they can't sit somewhere because they are black. If it isn't a nice word, don't use it, regardless of how tan you are.

MissNikki007

annaruiz2:

I just think that saying a person can't use a word because they are white isn't that far off from telling someone they can't sit somewhere because they are black. If it isn't a nice word, don't use it, regardless of how tan you are.

Or hey, maybe I was, I don't know, joking?

Venus04d

BostonKisses2:

CTGirl30:

Really?

It is taking a congenital medical condition and using it as a synonym for "stupid" or "dumb". Replace it with, "I feel like such a cancer patient", followed by an eye roll. Makes about as much sense, when you really think about it, right?

Do you understand why using "That's so gay" is incredibly offensive? It's taking an innate characteristic of a person and turning it into an insult / negotive connotation. Same concept.

This.

Double this. I don't understand why this is a difficult concept.

TunaTown

I ask an innocent question and requested an explanation

and this is where this thread is going...........

 

CoffeeBeen

RayRay007:

LuckyDad:

CoffeeBeen:

Do you really not get it?  Because retarded used to refer to mentally handicapped people, substituting it for negative words like dumb/stupid/ridiculous is tantamount to calling mentally handicapped people dumb/stupid/ridiculous. 

If you mean dumb/stupid/ridiculous then say that and leave a vulnerable population out of it.

ETA: grammar 

Technically "dumb" is a medical condition. Arguably it is offensive to a mute person.

Yeah, I was just gonna say.

I would argue that speech has changed enough in that case that it's disanalogous. 

I just looked them up in the dictionary to make sure and the primary definition of dumb is lacking intelligence whereas the primary definition of retarded is to be characterized my mental retardation. 

I mean, point taken, but one is clearly more divergent than the other.  I think that's why this is a difficult concept for some to grasp.  They see a word's meaning as all or none whereas in reality it is a very long, complicated course where lines must be drawn.

TunaTown

CoffeeBeen:

RayRay007:

LuckyDad:

CoffeeBeen:

Do you really not get it?  Because retarded used to refer to mentally handicapped people, substituting it for negative words like dumb/stupid/ridiculous is tantamount to calling mentally handicapped people dumb/stupid/ridiculous. 

If you mean dumb/stupid/ridiculous then say that and leave a vulnerable population out of it.

ETA: grammar 

Technically "dumb" is a medical condition. Arguably it is offensive to a mute person.

Yeah, I was just gonna say.

I would argue that speech has changed enough in that case that it's disanalogous. 

I just looked them up in the dictionary to make sure and the primary definition of dumb is lacking intelligence whereas the primary definition of retarded is to be characterized my mental retardation. 

I mean, point taken, but one is clearly more divergent than the other.  I think that's why this is a difficult concept for some to grasp.  They see a word's meaning as all or none whereas in reality it is a very long, complicated course where lines must be drawn.

Exactly. Thank you for your explaination.

write2nicole

I understand completely why it's offensive. 

What I do not understand is giving attitude to someone who respectfully requests an explanation. That doesn't encourage people to educate themselves or seek out your opinions in the future.

Tuna didn't say, "I'm gonna use it no matter what you say, put on your big girl panties and suck it up!" She said she avoids saying it in public because she knows it's offensive, but doesn't understand why - and would like to understand.

I appreciate those who took the time to explain it for her. Hopefully she appreciates the explanations, too, and will stop using it as a derogatory word, even privately.   

ShellShockedMama

TunaTown:

I ask an innocent question and requested an explanation

and this is where this thread is going...........

 

Hey.  I answered nicely! 

FezzesAreCool

Zach Galifianakis's pronunciation of the r-word in The Hangover will always be funny.

It's funny because it's absurd. 

TunaTown

ShellShockedMama:

TunaTown:

I ask an innocent question and requested an explanation

and this is where this thread is going...........

 

Hey.  I answered nicely! 

And I appreciate that. Some people were not very nice and addressed me like I was dumb for even asking for an explanation. Also - the whole troll angle....

 

TunaTown

ShellShockedMama:

TunaTown:

I ask an innocent question and requested an explanation

and this is where this thread is going...........

 

Hey.  I answered nicely! 

And I appreciate that. Some people were not very nice and addressed me like I was dumb for even asking for an explanation. Also - the whole troll angle....

 

TunaTown

write2nicole:

I understand completely why it's offensive. 

What I do not understand is giving attitude to someone who respectfully requests an explanation. That doesn't encourage people to educate themselves or seek out your opinions in the future.

Tuna didn't say, "I'm gonna use it no matter what you say, put on your big girl panties and suck it up!" She said she avoids saying it in public because she knows it's offensive, but doesn't understand why - and would like to understand.

I appreciate those who took the time to explain it for her. Hopefully she appreciates the explanations, too, and will stop using it as a derogatory word, even privately.   

This.

Thank you W2N

catycate

Um, a select few mental disabilities are actually related at all to chromosomes. That is all. I agree with everything else in that statement.