Trouble TTC

after 9 years of TTTC I hate........

going to baby showers and I can't really hold new borns. It hurts too much. Family members look at me like I'm crazy that I don't want to hold the cute new baby. Does anyone else feel like this? Tomorrow I have to go to the hospital and meet my new nephew and I am not looking forward to it. I love kids including all my nieces and nephews but its newborns and pregnant ladies that make me uncomfortable. Have I totally lost it?

Re: after 9 years of TTTC I hate........

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    Wow...9 years is a really long time. I've been 3T for a much shorter period of time than you and like to avoid pregnant women and small babies as well, but after that long, it has to be waaaaaay worse for you. It sounds very normal, and I think you're brave for going to visit in the first place. 

    My SIL had my twin nephews about 2 months ago, and when we went to visit them in the hospital, it was rough. She had IVF 3 times to have those kids, so I know she went through a lot and she nor the babies ever bothered me. The thing that really got to me at the hospital was the whole family thinking it was appropriate to ask DH and I when we were having kids, and after like the 4th person did it, I just wanted to either get really pissed at them or cry. DH figured out it was the cue to leave.

    Maybe it would be better and less painful to wait until they get home so at least everybody isn't around? If your family doesn't know about what is going on with you, I don't know how you managed to keep it in for so long. Maybe it would be better for you, and easier for them to understand what you're going through if you talked about it. 

              TTC 17 months, Dx: MFI (morph = 1,) Endo. Surprise BFP after HSG!
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    Ms H13Ms H13 member
    I completely agree, I have a hard time seeing pg ladies and newborns.  I will not visit anyone at the hospital and haven't held a baby in ~2.5 years.  Dealing with IF presents challenges on a daily basis and there are a few things I can do to make it easier on myself (not attending showers, visiting newborns, birthday parties for kids under a certain age, ect.).  I decided long ago to give myself 'permission' to do what was best for me in those situations.  Hugs.
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