Vent and Question to City Dwellers

vintagev

We live in the city, while our family lives in the suburbs.  Every since we got married, they have asked if and when we will ever move to the burbs or country.  They believe the city is dangerous, terrible schools, and not suitable to raise a family.  We have always maintained that we will never move to the burbs because we work in the city and enjoy city life. 

Well, now that we are expecting, we hear it all the time now.  Its getting to the point where its downright annoying and rude.  We have to constantly reiterate that the city is not dangerous, we love it and the diversity, etc. etc.  I grew up in a small town and will never want to go back to that life or raise my children in the burbs.  That's just not for me.  It's okay for other people, but not what I want for our family.  However, they don't buy it and keep pestering us to move. 

Have any of you fellow citydwellers encounter this?

Meagan0528

We are in the exact same boat. I don't mind the country life (MH and I grew up in a small town-he literally lived on a farm), and we may go back to it someday, but we plan on staying in the city for a while. Our families do not understand why we would want to raise our children in the city, or even why we choose to live here. I just chalk it up to to each their own, and we agree to disagree. I don't know how to stop their comments, so I just take them in stride and respond with something positive about city life. Sometimes it's all you can do...

hilsy85

We've never heard this in regards to safety...we live in NYC, which is actually the safest big city. Our immediate families also live in NYC, which is maybe why they don't worry about it. We have heard stuff about not wanting to raise kids in an apartment/opinions that kids need backyards, space to play, etc. DH and I both grew up in apartments and turned out fine, so we're not worried. I would just tell other people that you guys are happy with your living situation, but if anything changes you'll be sure to let them know....I feel like people often think it's their responsibility to change your mind so that you agree with them on issues like this!

DelBride2012

Do we ever encounter it? Yeah, once in a while, lol! 

In terms of safety, we believe the city is a much safer place to raise children, because they don't need to drive as teens (or be passengers of other teen drivers) to have an active social life. We live in Chicago, and while the overall crime rate is fairly high, our neighborhood is quite safe. It's far more likely that our daughter would be killed in a suburban car accident than as a result of inner city crime, particularly in our upscale neighborhood. 

In terms of education, there are many charter and magnet art schools available of outstanding quality. If we don't send our children to one of those, we can afford one of the several top-notch private schools in the city. Aside from formal education, I highly value access to culture, museums, art, indie theatres, ethnic restaurants, etc. In my opinion kids in the suburbs spend too much time watching TV in sprawling dens and shopping in malls.

While the suburbs are designed to feel like a familial oasis, we believe we can offer our children so much more in an urban setting.  

skibi83

I grew up in the city and loved it, but I love what the country has to offer so I would love to live in a farm just outside a city about 15-20 miles from it. Of course my city standards are much lower, but I would like to live near a town of about 2-3,000. I grew up in a city of 130,000 and it is now up over 200,000. I think the city is much more diverse and gives kids the opportunity that they may not have in a smaller town. I currently live in a small town about 600 and do not want to ever live in a small town again.

lauraliz24

We live in the city (Mpls/St Paul), and love it.  We've never been 'burb people and I'm not going to change  that because we're having a baby.  When people ask us, we just say that we love the city and are looking forward to all the opportunities our child will have growing up in the city.  Yup, we've got a smaller backyard and sometimes there's loud music at night.  But there's so much to do, we've got museums, restaurants, fairs, parks, farmer's markets, I'm just looking forward to experiencing all those things with my baby!

dakiesgirl

No, but we are close.  My family keeps bringing up the fact that we live in an apartment.  We have no immediate plans to buy a house, I don't care what the market is doing!  We are saving a buttload and would rather not have such a big mortgage when the time comes.  Besides, our babies won't remember being a little cramped right now anyway.  Even if we were in  a house, our youngest would be in our bedroom anyway.