CIO Success...But I'm the one crying...

lisac1017

Moms who have babies who have only ever fallen asleep by nursing, being held or otherwise needing Mom to get to sleep will understand this feeling.  I have never been able to put DS to sleep without nursing him at night (up to 45 minutes, even at almost 5 months) and then waiting another 20 minutes for him to be so sound asleep that I can put him down and sneak out without him knowing and stay asleep at best for 3 hours, then repeat 2-4 more times throughout the night.  His naps were always only successful if he slept on me after nursing. 

I was open to CIO but ready to abort if it was too tough on DS.  It was a total success right away.  He cried less than a toal of 12 minutes the first night, less than 1 minute last night and no crying tonight.  Naps were just as successful.

So why am I the one walking out of his room, him sound asleep on his own in his crib, crying?  For 4 months, I dreamed of the day that I could put him down and he could sleep on his own.  Now that he is doing just that, I'm missing all the time I held him in my arms while he slept so peacefully.  The fact that I'm going back to work in 2 weeks I'm sure is making this harder, and I know that it's best for him that he can put himself to sleep.  But it is SO bittersweet.  If I'm so upset about this...I can only imagine what a mess I'm going to be at other maturing milestones. 

This is the kind of stuff that no parenting book can prepare you for. 

emilyknelson

I totally understand.  We have been using the no cry sleep solution, but I miss holding him so much.  I actually had him nap on me today because I didn't want to let him go.  It helps to wear him with the ergo when we are running errands and doing housework so I get some baby cuddle time

lisac1017

emilyknelson:

I totally understand.  We have been using the no cry sleep solution, but I miss holding him so much.  I actually had him nap on me today because I didn't want to let him go.  It helps to wear him with the ergo when we are running errands and doing housework so I get some baby cuddle time

Agreed! I always wear him when I'm out and about...that was another way he would nap, either on me or in the Bjorn. 

stacee55j

Question - so did you just lay him down after nursing or move up nursing to another part of your bedtime routine? I know this day is coming soon for us. I out him down at night the same way you described and he'll only nap while nursing or in his swing after nursing. 

lisac1017

stacee55j:

Question - so did you just lay him down after nursing or move up nursing to another part of your bedtime routine? I know this day is coming soon for us. I out him down at night the same way you described and he'll only nap while nursing or in his swing after nursing. 

I kept the entire bedtime routine the same, nursed him as usual and then laid him right down in the crib.  I didn't separate nursing at all.  I put him down on his side because that is the way he likes to sleep when he is in bed with us.  He cried as soon as he realized he was in his crib, then he fussed until he finally got himself on his tummy.  At that point, he was immediately silent and didn't move for 4 hours.  Of course, I stared at the monitor the entire time and still went in to check on him 3 times just to make sure he was ok. 

rcanales

I know how you feel.  We recently put him in the crib in his own room.  I was DYING for sleep for 5 months and now.... I just miss him being next to me.  I use to pray that he'd sleep longer at night, too.  Now that he's in his crib he gets up once I find myself staring at him on the monitor ready to go in if he cries.  DH gives me a hard time because I wasn't this attached to DS1.  However, DH was around a lot more to help with DS1, so we split the duties.  Also, DS1 was EBF for three months before I had to supplement, slept through the night at 3mos and slept with no problem on his back in his own bed.  DS2 is still EBF so its all me.  I didn't think I'd have such a tough time with him being okay in his own bed either!