Birth story of Owen (absurdly long)
Nicolewinsbingo
member
Natural birth that didn't go as planned...wouldn't really recommend reading right now for those planning a natural labor soon because it didn't go as expected and I don't want you to lose your confidence...you can do it!
Here is my birth story for my son, Owen, born May 1, 2012 at 9:51pm. He's 2 weeks old today!
Monday, April 30 I went in for my 39 week check up. I saw a new doctor and she did an internal exam. I was 60% effaced, 1 cm dilated, and the baby was at a -3 station. (I had made no progress from the week before). I felt like she really had to dig up in there to reach him, and the exam was uncomfortable. She basically assured me that I was not ready to go into labor and that I'd see them next week. I was fine with all of that, and I didn't physically feel like I was ready to go into labor yet, no contractions or anything.
DH and I leave and go to Barnes and Noble to kill some time before picking up his car from the shop. At the store, I feel some fluid leaking in my underwear. This happened the week before and it was just the lube they use (I think) so I dismissed it at first. The more we walked around the store though, the more I knew something was up. I went to the bathroom and lost my mucus plug. I was excited and nervous that something had changed! I didn't take it to mean that I was going into labor though. But as DH and I finished shopping I could feel more and more fluid coming out, so I started to suspect my water broke. It was not a ton of fluid, but enough to make me suspicious. This was around 11AM. I called the office and they said to come on in, but I said I'd give it another hour or two to be sure it was my water, and then I'd come in. They said fine.
DH and I go pick up the car and go home and get our bags for the hospital. At home my water really started leaking and gushing and I knew it was definitely my amniotic fluid leaking. I ate a light lunch and we headed off to the hospital. At the hospital we got monitored and I was having contractions but not feeling them. The test came back that my water was definitely broken, and we went over my birth plan.
My birth plan was to have as natural a birth as possible. I didn't want pitocin, drugs, or any other medical interventions if I could help it. I really really did not want a c-section. The nurse gave me some tips to help with pain naturally, and we discussed that I might need pitocin since my water had broken but I wasn't having strong contractions. We were checked into our hospital room and the nurse and doctors changed shifts. We ended up having 4 different docs on call, and 5 nurse shifts while we were in labor and delivery.
The nurses told me that I had two options. I could go on pitocin to get my labor going, or I could have a few hours, and then have cervadil inserted to help ripen my cervix. The cervadil would be in for 12 hours and then if I wasn't making progress, I would have to have pitocin. I opted for cervadil. DH (Cory) and I walked around the hospital, had dinner, did stretches, etc, and I started to have a few contractions I could feel, but not painful. At around 6pm I had the cervadil put in and had to stay in bed for 2 hours. Afterwards, DH and I played some cards, watched TV, and told the families that we were at the hospital, but that it looked like it would be a long time before the baby came. We asked them to stay home until more action started to happen.
At around 10pm I went to the bathroom and the cervadil came out with a gush of amniotic fluid. (I was still leaking fluid like crazy, filling up pads left and right with fluid. It was gross!) They gave me 2 more hours to walk around and stretch and whatnot to try to get my labor moving, then had to put in a new cervadil at midnight. I tried to sleep, but they wanted to continuously monitor the baby's heartbeat and my contractions and the monitors kept sliding off my belly in the night. The nurse came in every 20 minutes it felt like to adjust it, and I slept no more than an hour or two all night. During the night, I started having painful contractions, but the pain level was low, maybe a 4 out of 10.
In the morning, they took out the cervadil and did an internal exam. I was dilated 1cm (still), baby was at -3 station (still) and I was effaced 80% (instead of 60%). This was 20 hours after my water broke. I was disappointed by the lack of progress. They told me I had to start on pitocin. I was upset, but understood it to be necessary to get my labor moving, since we needed to avoid the risk of infection. I showered and got cleaned up, then they started me off low on pitocin and continued to increase it incrementally throughout the day. I had to have an IV for the pitocin, which I didn't want. I had to have continuous monitoring with the pitocin, as was hospital policy. I was still allowed to eat and drink and get out of bed, but only about a 4 foot space next to my bed since I had to stay plugged in. I had to unplug to go to the bathroom, then hurry up and plug back in. I felt somewhat trapped and confined which was upsetting, but I was dealing with it okay.
The pain increased throughout the day, as the pitocin was pushed up and up. My pain went from a 4 to a 6, to an 8 and then to a 9/10. Cory and I breathed through contractions, he used counter pressure on my back, I laid in the runner position for a while (Bradley method), I used a birthing ball, a rocking chair, stood, used aroma therapy, used the bathroom frequently, used a heat pack, you name it. I really wanted to shower, as the pain got worse. I begged to shower, but my nurse said it couldn't be done...they couldn't unplug me and my plugs couldn't go in the shower. It was a very emotional process...being forced to do things I never wanted to do, and to work for so long, but Cory was my rock and we rode through the pain and contractions and doubt together.
They did periodic internal exams and I was not making much progress. I had made it to 3cm dilated, 80% effaced and baby -3/-2 station by around noon. My pain spiked up to a 9/10 around 4pm (if I remember correctly). I was extremely nauseous. I had to stand at the bathroom sink and I felt like I would vomit every contraction. My contractions were about 1 minute apart and lasting a minute or more each. Cory tried back pressure but I just couldn't find any kind of relief. I begged the nurse (Anna) to use the shower, but she told me I couldn't. I started to feel frantic, and I cried on and off. Cory cried too...I know watching me in so much pain and seeing me feeling so defeated was very hard for him. I was holding onto the hope that I could be in transition, or at least making a lot of progress at that point. I was going through textbook labor signs for transition, and I was really banking on having made at least a good degree of progress, because I knew that I couldn't keep going in that much pain, without any other methods of pain relief for much longer. I was exhausted, having not slept in 32+ hours. The doctor came to do an internal exam. She told me I had dilated to a 4...a 3/4ish...from a 3, and no other progress. I think at that point everyone was a little devastated. The nurses and the doctor and DH were all rooting that I was finally making progress, and I had made basically none. Hearing 4cm, I knew that textbook labor meant I had another 6-12 hours to go, maybe more. I felt I could not endure that level of pain for that much longer, plus pushing. I buckled and said I needed some kind of pain relief and we settled on an epidural. I bawled. I didn't want an epidural at all, I was pretty much morally opposed to one, and I didn't think it was best for the baby. I was afraid of side effects, and I felt like I had failed. Cory cried too, but supported me in my decision. The doctor was basically like "Are you crazy?! Of course you should get an epidural! I can't believe you didn't get one already!" I didn't feel like that lady got me. My nurse, Anna, did get me. She pep talked me the rest of the night. I think she understood my feelings of utter defeat but was trying to remind me that I should be proud of the 30 or so hours I had worked without any relief or sleep. She was so kind and she tried really really hard to make me feel better.
The epidural doc came, and the needle was in around 5:30 or 6. I could hardly sit still for the needle, the contractions were so bad. I was ready to scream at poor Anna because she kept trying to make me sit still, when all I wanted to do was stand at the bathroom sink and vomit. Finally the guy got it in, after reminding me of all the possible scary side effects. The relief came very quickly. I laid in the bed and covered my eyes and cried. I obviously had kind of mentally lost my will at that point, but after Anna's pep talks and Cory's loving reassurance, and after my body started to relax from the extreme pain, I started to feel like myself again. I labored away in the bed, mostly numb, and looked forward to my son coming.
Sometime around there the baby had a drop in heart rate so they had to take me off the pitocin for a few minutes and my labor apparently completely stopped. I really didn't notice all of this happening, I think it was during the pre-epidural hysteria. The baby's heart rate stabilized quickly and they had to slowly restart me on pitocin, so we expected the process to be even further stalled. The fact that my labor stopped without pitocin tells me that my body did not want to go into labor at all, and that my water breaking was accidental and earlier than was meant to be. I vaguely blame my somewhat rough internal exam for the early rupture of my membranes.
I could still feel some pressure around my rectum. I could also sort of feel my toes and legs. I hated how the sheets felt on my skin. I did not like how the epidural made me feel. I asked for it to be turned off as soon as possible, when delivery was imminent. I wanted it off for pushing, knowing it would take a couple of hours to wear off anyways. At around 8pm, the nurse came in and told me they were going to put in an internal monitor. We had avoided it that long, but it was finally time that the doc pretty much insisted. I dejectedly agreed. She was starting to forebode of a c-section, though she didn't say it outright. I knew I was moving in that direction, after my water having been broken for 33+ hours. When Anna went to put the monitor in, surprise!!!! I was fully dilated and she could see the head!!! She showed Cory the top of his head and we cried again, this time tears of utter joy. FINALLY the end was in sight! They skipped the internal monitor and called the doc.
I started pushing around 9pm. I pushed gently because the doc wasn't there yet. Doc showed up around 9:30, after really only a handful of pushes. I pushed a couple more times, and out he came, all in one push! No tearing, no stitches, nothing! I held him and loved him and was so utterly thankful to have him and for it to be over. He was born at 9:51pm, just around 35 hours from when my water broke. We named him Owen Douglas, and he was 7lb 8oz and 20 inches long!
The first couple of hours of recovery were a little tough because Owen and I both spiked a fever right after delivery. I got extreme tremors and chills and Cory had to hold Owen because I couldn't hold my arms still. It was a bit upsetting but it passed quickly and I was so elated from having him.
We were so happy to finally get out of that hospital on May 4th. We are so utterly in love with him and eternally grateful to God for such a tremendous blessing!
It took a week or so to heal emotionally from my labor experience. I was and am happy with most of it. Looking back, a lot of things happened to me that I didn't want to happen, but I didn't have control over most of them. I only had control over my epidural, and although I'm sad I felt I needed one, it very well might be the reason I didn't have to get a c-section, and for that I am grateful. I would be willing to do it all again and again to have my darling baby. I also had such an easy, healthy pregnancy, and now such a wonderful healthy baby, that how can I really feel bad about the 1 or 2 hard days it took for him to be here?
In the future, I would love to attempt a natural birth again, but may choose to deliver at a different place, and hope my body is able to labor naturally without the necessity of pitocin. The nurses told me afterwards that another nurse was rooting for me to be allowed to take a shower and had actually contacted the company that makes the monitors to find a way for me to get in the shower with it. She succeeded in finding a way and had a set up a room for me to shower in, and was coming to tell me right as I got my epidural. I am disappointed I didn't have the chance to do that and try to labor a bit longer without the epidural because my fast progression *might* have happened anyways if I had continued to stand and labor and shower...I guess I'll never know!
Happy 2 weeks to the love of my life!
Re: Birth story of Owen (absurdly long)
9 angels in heaven-3 in my arms and 1 in the NICU
Mono/di twin girls: Josephine born to heaven and Evangeline born Earthside at 25w
This, all of this!
Thank you so much, both of you! Typing it all out was therapeutic. Even if it didn't go how I had hoped, I am owning it as My story and the story of how Owen came to us.
I am thankful every day for my miracle after infertility.
And thrilled to be pregnant again after FET!
Blessed with our beautiful girl May 30/2012 - BFP June 20th/2013 - Naturally MC June 30th/13.
BFP Aug 1/2013