October 2012 Moms
Mrs.G123
member
Please talk me down:(((
Mrs.G123
member
This is ridiculous. I am TERRIFIED to find out the sex of the baby. DH has decided he wants to know, called the u/s place himself. This is so cute and unlike him. Ihe is excited and I think we should go for it. But I am terrified. DD has her heart set on a little sis and I can't imagine how disappointed she will be. We won't be having more kids. Please let me know if you can relate! FY I I was terrified to POAS as well 
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Re: Please talk me down:(((
I've had to deal with gender dissappointment from family, but obviously not from a LO.
Everything will be fine and perfect. There's nothing you can do about others reactions. Babies require constant adjustments to your perceptions and actions, starting from that moment you think you might need to POAS.
That probably wasn't very helpful, but it's all I have to offer.
You are going to have to find out at some point--unless youre one of those odd folks who dresses your child gender neutral and wont tell anyone the sex for years!
Even then, YOU'll still know!
If its a boy, then its probably better for your DD to have several months to get used to the idea and do special things for the baby to get her excited about having a brother rather than laying a new sibling AND a penis on her at the same time (okay that sounded terrible but you know what I mean).
In my experience it is harder for men to bond with and connect with their unborn children. If this u/s will make DH feel excited about the new arrival and give him something to look forward to and relate to, why not?!
For what its worth, I was also terrified to POAS--I think i KNEW i was pregnant and didnt want to see it for certain--and DD also insists on a "baby sister" so Im in a similar predicament wondering about her reaction if its a boy.
Lastly, if you are a spiritual person, you can always think about how this baby was chosen just for you. Whether its a boy or girl, this is the right baby for your family--powers far more knowledgable than you have made that choice for you--so embrace it and enjoy it. Either your daughter will get her little sister, or she wont have to share her tutus, either way she wins!! ...well, unless your son likes tutus that is.
I say go ahead with the ultrasound and if it turns out you are having a boy, then have a talk with your baby girl about how much fun a brother will be! She can teach him things and play with him and help you take care of him! Tell her that boys need a big sister to keep them in line! (lol) Make her role as important as possible in the life of her little brother that her disappointment will disappear. (that's what I would do, anyway)
PS. All this is in response to when my nephew asked for a puppy and got a little sister. He was very disappointed, but when my mom gave my sister the above advice, it turned out great. He's 16 and his sister is 9 and he loves her to death, because he "helped raise her."
My son and daughter both wanted a sister. They are both 4. When the tech said it was a boy, they fussed. By the time we were leaving the office, my husband had to take them out to the car they were both crying and whining about not wanting a brother. It lasted a few day. We used positive reinforcement and lots of excitement when talking about the baby.Fast forward... 10 days later they tell everyone we see. "My Mom is having a baby and it is a boy" They are excited. I would find out sooner then later and talk it up.
Also this behavior is completely out of character for my children. They are generally very well natured. They both really wanted a sister.
Good Luck