Husband throws a tantrum...

ERINPETERSON

I am so damn annoyed with my husband right now. He threw a tantrum this morning because he had asked me if he could go golfing after I was up all night with our 8 month old and got no sleep. I said to him I would really appreciate it if you got up and helped me with him because I am so tired. 

 

He got up went to the bathroom and when he came out he stomped his feet and said like a 5 year old FINE IM SLEEPING UNTIL 11 THEN.

 

I wanted to knock his ass out.

I told him get out of here and go golf ya big baby. Sorry I needed to vent. He normally helps me every morning when he doesnt have meetings so excuse me for wanting to lay down and sleep for a few minutes. Anyone else experience this? I stay home except for 7 hours a week I run my gymnastics business. I love my little breaks in the morning and that is the only time I can catch up on sleep.

 

Why don't guys get this? BLAH. I am done now. 

notkateanymore

Well, he got what he wants, so I'm pretty sure he's good now. If you want him to stay home, tell him. Don't let him get away with acting like an ass.

Mrs. Rohde

KateMW:

Well, he got what he wants, so I'm pretty sure he's good now. If you want him to stay home, tell him. Don't let him get away with acting like an ass.

  completely agree.

lexusolsen

I would tell him you don't care where he goes as long as he takes LO with him.  Give him your carrier (if you have one)- have fun golfing with LO attached.

lraley

They think because we are SAHM's that is our job and we shouldn't complain about it.  I have this argument with my DH all the time.  He always wants to sleep in on weekends and I just want one day to be able to get some rest.  My DD is older now, but still will occasionally have night terrors.  Being pregnant I wake up during the night to potty anyway, but a little break in the mornings would be nice.  He has started to get it a little more since I got pregnant, especially since our loss in the fall.  I would definitely talk with him later and tell him how you feel and possible tell him that tonight is his night and you will be sleeping in tomorrow.  Get him used to the idea now and don't let him back out.

celiabwatson

I find that if I want a break in the morning we have to plan ahead for it. My husband does not roll with the punches as well as I do. If I have a rough night with the kids but he has plans in the morning then that's just the way it is. However, if I'm feeling particularly run down and need a sleep in morning I'll tell him ahead of time (like a few days) that I need a break and I will be sleeping in on Sunday. That way he knows it's coming and is better able to handle it. 

I also frequently counter his requests to go do something fun by himself with my own. Example: "Can I go play golf today?" "Sure honey, can I go out for coffee tomorrow morning with my friend?" It works well. We both need breaks every now and then, this keeps it pretty fair.

The_Jen626

We alternate sleeping in, and I get plenty of "me time" so I don't mind letting him out to do whatever he wants.

joyfullyfound

Oh, husbands..

This is our almost nightly routine (b/c he insists on feeding our dog leftovers and crap even though it makes him sick):

 2:00am (we've agreed that since he never gets up with DD, he takes care of the dog)

ME: "Hon, the dog's whining and needs to go out."

Proceed to have to go to ridiculous lengths to wake him up, thus completely getting me wide awake in the process.

DH: "Ok, ok, I'm going"

DH falls asleep again. I'm afraid the dog is going to poo all over the house for me to clean up in the morning.

ME: "Zach? The dog-"

DH: "I HEARD YOU!!!  I SAID I WAS GOING!!!!!!"

And then he gets up in this huge huff and makes a big deal about it all, sighing and stomping around. It's SO annoying! Gah.

 

 

vlagrl29

scatteredtrees:

Did he just wake up and decide to go golfing or had this been on the radar? Because really, if it was previously okay'd and planned I don't think it's fair for you to tell him he can't go. It wasn't his fault your baby was up all night. 

I'd just say go golf and have fun, but when you get home I'm taking a nap and LO is all yours.  

This is a good point.  I don't understand why he wouldn't help you out during the middle of the night?  He sounds like a baby.  My husband never pulls sh!t like this 

J&A2008

scatteredtrees:

Did he just wake up and decide to go golfing or had this been on the radar? Because really, if it was previously okay'd and planned I don't think it's fair for you to tell him he can't go. It wasn't his fault your baby was up all night. 

I'd just say go golf and have fun, but when you get home I'm taking a nap and LO is all yours.  

THIS.  You're not his mommy.  You can't ground him just because you're crabby.

And I'm curious if this is going to be your only kid?  You may be up all night, but you still have to be able to function.  It's a terrible part of the job, and not one that is fully known until you become a parent.

MrsBalletStar05

Complaining about your husband on the bump rarely goes well :-/ 

notkateanymore

amy052006:

KateMW:

Well, he got what he wants, so I'm pretty sure he's good now. If you want him to stay home, tell him. Don't let him get away with acting like an ass.

Ditto.  And "guys" aren't like this, your husband is.  I slept in until 11:00 today.

Exactly. Though I was up at 8 since DH was OOT. I love to sleep in. 

jw87

Men are selfish.

It's hard enough voicing your needs only to have them pushed aside.  Next time I would suggest a compromise.  

"Could you wait till 1pm to go golfing so I can rest?  I didn't get much sleep."  If he still insists, say... "that's fine as long as you get a sitter so I can rest."  

I think this would be a much better approach, although people say... "don't let him get away with that..." that's really not a problem solving solution or helpful. 

Edit: I do agree if it was previously planned, I would have sucked it up and mentioned that when he got home it was "me" time. 

12bailey18

amy052006:

KateMW:

Well, he got what he wants, so I'm pretty sure he's good now. If you want him to stay home, tell him. Don't let him get away with acting like an ass.

Ditto.  And "guys" aren't like this, your husband is.  I slept in until 11:00 today.

I agree with this.

jw87

MrsBalletStar05:

Complaining about your husband on the bump rarely goes well :-/ 

I think it's better than complaining to family or someone who's opinion of your H will change.  Everyone needs to vent now and then. 

J&A2008

jw87:

MrsBalletStar05:

Complaining about your husband on the bump rarely goes well :-/ 

I think it's better than complaining to family or someone who's opinion of your H will change.  Everyone needs to vent now and then. 

True.

MrsBalletStar05

J&A2008:

jw87:

MrsBalletStar05:

Complaining about your husband on the bump rarely goes well :-/ 

I think it's better than complaining to family or someone who's opinion of your H will change.  Everyone needs to vent now and then. 

True.

As long as you don't take to heart all of the comments from people on how their husband would NEVER do that and how you must be a crazy person for marrying someone who does ;-)  

J&A2008

MrsBalletStar05:

J&A2008:

jw87:

MrsBalletStar05:

Complaining about your husband on the bump rarely goes well :-/ 

I think it's better than complaining to family or someone who's opinion of your H will change.  Everyone needs to vent now and then. 

True.

As long as you don't take to heart all of the comments from people on how their husband would NEVER do that and how you must be a crazy person for marrying someone who does ;-)  

Right, since their husbands never need alone time. 

KBratt1

If DS is up too long at night I hand him to DH & go back to bed...I deserve just as much sleep as he does! I have to be able to function during the day to take care of DD & the house/errands/bills etc. just like he needs to function at work.

Although Sundays are his only day off it is our mutual agreement that it is "My" day. He likes to stay home on his day off so he gets to WITH THE KIDS! While sleep in, go to the grocery store, get my nails done, run errands, etc. Unless he has to work on Sunday- like tomorrow...but that is rare & since he will be working 13days straight I technically will be too:)

Andrewsgal

jw87:

Men are selfish.

It's hard enough voicing your needs only to have them pushed aside.  Next time I would suggest a compromise.  

"Could you wait till 1pm to go golfing so I can rest?  I didn't get much sleep."  If he still insists, say... "that's fine as long as you get a sitter so I can rest."  

I think this would be a much better approach, although people say... "don't let him get away with that..." that's really not a problem solving solution or helpful. 

Edit: I do agree if it was previously planned, I would have sucked it up and mentioned that when he got home it was "me" time. 

Um no you are wrong. Not all men are selfish. Please don't tell yourself is just to make you feel better that you married a selfish jerk. Why would you breed again with a man who I'd selfish?

Notwifezilla7

Got to agree here with those in the camp that the argument that "Men are selfish" is wrong. 

People treat you the way you let them treat you.

 Men, Women, Kids, everyone. 

I don't care which way you couch, it but if you aren't happy with the situation, let him know, period.  

cmeinla

 

magsugar13

jw87:

Men are selfish.

It's hard enough voicing your needs only to have them pushed aside.  Next time I would suggest a compromise.  

"Could you wait till 1pm to go golfing so I can rest?  I didn't get much sleep."  If he still insists, say... "that's fine as long as you get a sitter so I can rest."  

I think this would be a much better approach, although people say... "don't let him get away with that..." that's really not a problem solving solution or helpful. 

Edit: I do agree if it was previously planned, I would have sucked it up and mentioned that when he got home it was "me" time. 

 Not all men are selfish and immature, but if it makes you feel better about yours, than I understand.

No, assuming all men are selfish and need to be treated like babies is a much better solution.

PS. It isn't hard to voice your opinions when you are married to an adult male.

 

ERINPETERSON

This was not pre-planned. My husband didnt help me that morning and it made me nuts so I vented. 

We have an arrangement that every morning he gets up with my DS and takes him for the first few hours so I can work from home, clean or sleep.

 I was upset because of the night I had and he can be quite selfish at times but not always. I love him dearly but he just pissed me off thats all  

I vent on the bump because i can.

Thanks for the input though! I love to read what people think and experience whether their men can be selfish or would never do such a thing. He let me sleep for 2 hours today and go shopping because of yesterday. It really is all about the compromise.  

ERINPETERSON

Oh and he doesnt get up with my DS at night becauase I EBF. this is my choice which again is why my morning breaks are so valuable to me.