When it's time to go..

missnineteeneighty

I have a 30 month old son who has a difficult time leaving a play area when it is time to go. I know this is age appropriate. I have read all the books and done all the classes, but still I struggle with getting him to leave when it's time to go. I do not like to get into power struggles with my toddler and when it's time to go, it's time to go. I do not make it a choice.

I give plenty of warning before it's time to leave and I will get down to his level to communicate this in as few words as possible. He understands completely, but resists leaving. If he is on the slide and it is time to go, I will first give a warning and then say "One more time down the slide and we are leaving". He will then leave the slide and find another activity, avoiding the slide entirely. So I have tried "One minute and we are leaving" and he starts to freak. If I take his hand and say "we are leaving" he will lay on the ground, like just totally go limp on the ground and start crying. I do not make leaving a choice for him. Today, I told him I would count to three and if he did not stand up and walk with me, I would help him. So I ended up carrying him away from the play area.

What do you do if your toddler resists leaving?

jlh123

For my 2 1/2 year old twins I give three warmings.  I know, sounds crazy but I saw a woman do it about 3-4 months ago and use it always.  Honestly, I don't think I have had a breakdown since.  I first say we are leaving in five more minutes.  Then I saw we are leaving in two more minutes.  Then I saw we are leaving in one more minute so go down the slide one last time and we'll go.  A few times when I saw that one more minute the kids might say "5 more minutes mommy?" where I say we've already done 5 minutes and 2 minutes, now we are done.

Granted kids don't know time but they know what this countdown means.  Before I used it I always used to say "just give me two minutes" in my daily life so the were aware of the correlation when I started using it to leave.

A few of my friends now use it and works like a charm!

rosiemomma

I give my daughter about 15 minutes warning, but I tell her instead to 'say goodbye, we will be leaving soon" I repeat it about 3 times, and if she is resistant I do pick her up and continue  saying "Bye playground bye!" generally this works, but yes she has had a few times when she cried or had a tantrum, I just try to help her with gentle words but I keep it to a minimnum... usually just understanding like "OH you are mad about leaving, mad,  mad!" 

Otherwise I try had to give her about an hour to play, if she needs I bring snacks or water but if she spends  good hour playing it is rarely a hassle!  

StrawberryAlarmClock

I do something similar to jlh123. Also, for bath time, I set the alarm on my phone for 7:15 every day. Now when DS hears it, he says "uh oh! Bath time! And heads upstairs. 

Wally3

I give 5 mintue and then a 2/3 minute and a 1 minute/ pick one last thing to do and then we leave.  I make sure I'm completely ready to leave when I start warnings so he is not waiting for momy to find her purse or get a drink or say goodbye.  It may be hard at first but be consistant and he will get into the grove.

LIAngel

About 10 minutes before I will say "Okay we're going to leave in a little while".  N will say "Okay, Mommy".   I say it a ton of times.   Finally when it's time to go, I say "Okay N, time to go bye bye".  We'll come back to the park later".   He's usually pretty good.  Yesterday however he said "I do it one more time (run around on the huge play ground structure)".  I say "No honey, no more times.".  He cried all the way home.   

chloephoebecali

I will give warnings, but if she fusses I will usually mention that we need to let the dogs out/feed them/Dad is coming home soon/DS needs to eat, etc.  She usually buys into one of these and they are all typically true so I don't think it is all that terrible.

diana.filipi

Well, I'll be the one whose kid it is still really hard for ;-)  I give 3 warnings and still she has a really hard time giving it up easily.  Now that I am usually wearing DS it is a lot harder to just pick her up so she HAS to walk.  Sometimes it takes us a long time to get to the car.  I pick my playgrounds carefully now!  There's a small one that I can park right at that I usually get a friend to go with us to so she'll have a playmate and I can use the car seat for timeout if it's needed and also we don't have as far to go to leave.