My first and last at that office actually. I was not impressed! My OB is not available for appts until May so they had me see a new guy. Okay, whatever.I'm sure he's basically a nice guy, but made me feel dumb with some of my questions and concerns. Hey this is my first pregnancy. I'm kinda new at this. I don't deal with pg people day in and day out like a dr does. Give me a break if I ask a silly question. He wasn't at all concerned with the SCH that my RE saw. And didn't care to do an u/s to check on it or my LO. In fact the only thing he did do was blood work and a urine test. My first exam (not even u/s then isn't scheduled til the last week of April. Okay so I'm suppose to stay on pelvic rest cause we don't know what's up with the SCH? Really? Shouldn't you be a little more concerned besides just saying oh yea it's common and most babies aren't harmed by it. And call me crazy, but one other thing sealed the deal for me in walking outta there and looking for a new OB. (besides the fact they have 8-10 doc's u gotta see throughout your pg and never know who it might be)
After almost 10yrs of marriage, 5yrs of uterine cancer, and 7 years of failed IF treatments we ended up with a mirable BFP, I've really struggled so much with this pregnancy. I feel almost guilty... as if that hasn't been a major emotion throughout this whole journey as it was.
My new OB said, don't let anyone tell you that you are IF. You are not. I think he was trying to be encouraging and like yay, way to go. But, it cut me to the quick. I mean it hurt me so badly. IF has been a part of my identity for sooo long. And for someone to look at me and basically tell me that I've been living a lie for almost a decade... really? Tell that to my drained bank account and hard spots in my arse from so many injections. Tell that to the scale that increased over 60lbs from IF drugs, and depression.Tell that to the bitter betty that I became with every passing baby bump in the grocery. Tell that to the mother's days I spent in bed unable to face the world. Tell that to my marriage which took a beating every time I encouraged my husband to leave and find a woman that could give him a family. Tell that to my self esteem which nearly dwindled to nothing feeling like less of a woman and shamed. Tell that to the embie pics and little dishes my potential LO's lived in that are sitting in my dresser drawer unable to part from them still.
Yes we got a miracle, but IF has and will always be a part of my identity!
(if you made it this far, thanks for reading/listening)
Dx -Ute cancer, DOR from cancer treatments, and embryo quality issues. NOV 2010 CANCER FREE
2005-2011= 3 Rounds of Clomid, 5 IUI's, 3 IVF's- ALL BFN's
After 7yrs TTC, 5yrs of ute cancer, and 11 failed IF treatments, we got a surprise BFP! So thankful!
Gemma Grace born 09/30/12