Is it OK
to not be a complete wreck?
I mean this weekend I had some low moments. Cried and had to write in my journal. But once the bleeding stopped on Monday I haven't really been upset. Yes, I think about it everyday still, but it isn't really affecting how I'm feeling. I know some low moments are ahead, especially in November when I reach what should have been my due date.
I only knew about my pregnancy for just over a week, plus the whole time I just had this hesitancy that I didn't have with my son. I didn't have any cramping or anything to give me that hesitancy, just something in my head which obviously lived up to my expectation.
I guess I'm just feeling sad that I'm not more sad. With all the posts about how upset other mom's are even months after I just don't feel like I belong here or that I'm somehow a bad person.
Thanks for letting me share.
Re: Is it OK
I can relate to your post, especially about only knowing about the pregnancy for a week and just having a feeling that something wasn't right. I can't say that I've felt sad about my loss at any point. I wish we never went through it because it was awful, but I'm not sad or mad about it.
I don't think there's a right or wrong way to feel.... and I definitely don't think you're a bad person for not being sad "enough".
This exactly. It is absolutely awful, and I hate that we are all in this "club" together but I'm going to be OK. I guess I just know that it wasn't anything I did, so I'm ready to move on and TTC again. Dwelling on what could have been just isn't my style.
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Thank you for being strong enough to post this! I've often wondered if I was normal. I went back to work one day after. Except for spring break I haven't missed a class. I'm even keeping up with everything (and taking on more) after having a shot of Methotrexate on Tuesday. For me it's been easier to just stay busy. I have my moments, but they usually only happen when it's just me. In the car, in the shower, reading after DH-to-be falls asleep. You aren't alone in your feelings. What choice do we have but to be okay? If we ever want to move forward, be truly happy, and try again we have to be. Bend or break, right? We all deal in the ways we know how to.
Again, thank you. I wish you all of the best. For those moments you don't feel "right" for not being sad, I'm here, for sure.
I possibly had a cp in May , b/w was unable to confirm it.
I cried, and was disappointed, but never really heartbroken. I am not sure if it is because I was never really sure if I was pregnant.
But I do think it is very normal to not be distraught over a miscarriage,especially if you don't know you were pregnant for very long.
I can relate to your post is so many ways. Of course I was sad that it happend, actually more mad than anything, but I wasn't a wreck for weeks and weeks. Everyone handles things differently. I will say I have a son and I think that helped tremendously in my healing. I did have a really hard time with my first period after. We were given the go ahead to try right away and it not happening that cycle was really hard for me.
So sorry for your loss, good luck