i am a ferber failure... help, please!

toadieo

i attempted to start sleep training my son yesterday in hopes of getting him to sleep in his crib rather than our bed. he napped and fell asleep for the night relatively quickly. then he woke up at 1am screaming. i did the whole graduated waiting thing for an hour and 45 minutes, when he finally fell asleep. 5 minutes later, he was screaming again, and i gave up, and brought him into our bed. now what? should i just accept the fact that he'll be in our bed till college?;) help, please!

thanks!

laruasue

 The first night is rough. Not a lot of sleep for anyone. But the second night should be MUCH better.

 

We've had to sleep train a few times, it just hasn't worked until this past week. He finally caught on, and it's working.

Maybe just give it a break and try again in a week or two.

jmo866

It is extremely hard, but if you do decide to try it again you need to see it through, or don't bother trying again. You have to be 100% sure with your decision and even though you may second guess yourself in the moment, if it's done properly, it will work. It is very common for them to start crying again after stopping, this is the final protest. Usually it does not last as long as the first long stretch, if you had left him, he may have only cried a few more minutes (as has been in our case). I agree, 1 hr 45 minutes is very long, but if you really want him in the crib, regardless of what method you use, there is going to be some tears. Even using the Sleep Lady's "Shuffle", which is supposed to be a "gentle approach" where you stay in the room, will still result in tears. Have you read the Ferber book? It made me more confident in my decision. Think it over, usually it will be your last resort, if you are not comfortable sticking with it, maybe try some other methods first, putting him down very drowsy and comforting him to sleep, white noise etc. That way if you go to sleep training, you will be more sure that you tried everything else. GL!

melandgreg

At this point my LO won't fall asleep in her own bed. I finally got her to the point that she falls asleep in mine, and I place her in her crib for her actual sleep. She wakes up once at 11:30 but has trained herself to go back to sleep. We've had a pretty successful run with this for the last few weeks. I say, take your time, and forget the methods. Do it the way that works for YOUR family