Baby showers and due dates.

SpankylovesSparky · February 2012

Our church is hosting shower is next Saturday and I will be almost 32 weeks, a good time since we want to be able to get everything situated, cleaned and organized plus do some extra shopping for things we didn't receive. My aunt is also hosting an additional joint shower for me and my cousin at my grandmother's house since we are both expecting (She's two weeks behind me). A shower will be closer to my due date. This could be a problem since the further along I get, the harder it is to get around. It's also three hours away and DH and I are concerned we could be putting ourselves at risk. We don't want to be too far away from the hospital at that time. Since it's a joint shower, I have considered just sending my regrets and not going, But I don't know how to go about breaking this news to my relatives. It's a very nice thing they're trying to do and I don't want to be rude...but I also want to be safe, what are your thoughts?

joygazz · February 2012

How many weeks will you be?

Ruby412 · February 2012

I'm also curious how many weeks you will be? And also, are you at risk for pre-term labor? If there is a reason to suspect you will go early, I wouldn't travel too far. But if not, 3 hours will be plenty of time to make it to the hospital if you go into labor at the shower.

mommygrams0730 · February 2012

i agree with pp's there really should be no issue with traveling 3 hours away. it might be a little uncomfy in the car, but other than that you should be fine. is this your first, b/c most times ftm's go past their due date, not always but most times.

ETA: it really doesn't take too long to get things set up and situated. for a newborn as long as you have a carseat and crib (unless the baby is sleeping with you in your bed) those are the big things you need to have. diapers and clothes of course, but they really don't need much when they are first born.

lizzymo19 · February 2012

I was almost 34 weeks when we went to my family shower which is 3 hours away from where we live. We stayed there the whole weekend. Right now though, at almost 37 weeks, I definitely wouldn't want to be in a car that long, let alone far from the hospital (mainly because my insurance wouldn't cover as much out of network). It would depend on how far along you'll be for the 2nd shower.

speckledfrog · February 2012

I was totally in the "There's no probably with traveling X amount of hours away because you have time to get back" camp until Tuesday when I went into labor myself. I had no warning signs that I was about to have my baby and I even had a check up with the OB that morning. My contractions started at 6:00 and I had a baby in my arms by 2:00. I definitely did not have 3 hours to spare after we finally concluded that I was in labor for real. I was exactly 38 weeks.

Of course, everyone is different and your labor may be 15 hours two days after your due date with a day of practice labor leading up to it. That is certainly closer to what I was expecting but I was totally wrong! Do what feels comfortable to you.

jemgirl202 · February 2012

You should be fine, depending on how far along you will be. I was 38 weeks along when I had my shower and I live 40 minutes away from the hostess. I actually live about an hour away from the hospital depending on traffic and what time of day it is.

Everyone is different. I would not recommend going if you were pushing 39-40 weeks but if you have had no signs of preterm labor I would say you should be fine to travel around between 37-38 weeks.

kstopforth · February 2012

Since PPs pretty much covered the labor part, I'm going to go ahead and answer the OTHER question you asked. I don't think it would be rude to just explain to them that, though you would really love to come, you're worried that you'd be too far from the hospital and you really want the birth to go smoothly. If you continue to just apologize for not going (if you really do feel it's too late in your pregnancy to go) then I'm sure they will understand. I think you should just take the time to call and have a discussion about it with your family. The more in tune they are with how you're feeling (the more you explain), I think they'll get it and there won't be any hard feelings. Hope it helps!

kiarstin · February 2012

I still feel great and can get around pretty easy, serving, running/walking. I can't imagine sitting in a car, then sitting at a house or other location would be too taxing. Travel doesn't bother me too much but I have a really lax outlook on labor, kinda figure its 'usually' long so I would have time to get home. All in all I would go but it depends on how many weeks you are.

ndebello · February 2012

We just had our shower yesterday, 3 hours away. Car ride was a little uncomfy, but that was it. Also currently on strict bed rest. You should be just fine!

SpankylovesSparky · February 2012

Okay, thanks everyone! I really appreciate the advice. Most likely, the joint shower could be anywhere from 37-39 weeks, she hasn't settled yet. DH and I were mainly concerned, about the risks as this is our first time. He still doesn't want me to travel that close to the due date, just to be on the safe side. I think it makes him nervous. Thanks though everyone.

TnG05 · February 2012

Even though it may be an non-issue I wouldn't travel if I was that far along. I know you can always make it back if you go in labor or something while there. I also know that labor can last a long time but that would be one bad car ride back. Just let them know that you appreciate them thinking of you but that you don't feel comfortable traveling at point. They should understand and if not...oh well.