Ugh, why do I keep lurking there? — The Bump
Pregnant after a Loss

Ugh, why do I keep lurking there?

On the BMB that is.... there is a post about "anyone else unaffected by the u/s."  I'm not trashing that, because I guess I can understand it....it just makes me see yet again how different I am from a first time mom.  Watching that heartbeat stirred up a million emotions in me...the last ultrasound before this one was confirming that my sweet angel had died... watching a heart beating in my belly again was an emotional roller coaster.  ::sigh::  

The life of a pgal mama. 

Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers 

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Married the love of my life 7/11/09 - Our first baby, Peyton Mark, was born sleeping 10/25/11 at 33 weeks - Our second baby, BFP 2/4/12, welcome to the world Raylan! Holy Moly, BPF 2/4/14, please be safe and sound little one!

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Re: Ugh, why do I keep lurking there?

  • I commented. Somebody else commented in a way that I appreciated. :) But I kept my comment just focused on answering the question at hand and that I cried like a baby at my u/s last week. The response I got was a bit defensive, but eh.. whatevs.

    IMG_2014
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • imageSouthernBellaKS:
    I commented. Somebody else commented in a way that I appreciated. :) But I kept my comment just focused on answering the question at hand and that I cried like a baby at my u/s last week. The response I got was a bit defensive, but eh.. whatevs.

    I didn't get far enough down to see that....but I will look now.  Good job for commenting!

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers 

    CafeMom Tickers

    Married the love of my life 7/11/09 - Our first baby, Peyton Mark, was born sleeping 10/25/11 at 33 weeks - Our second baby, BFP 2/4/12, welcome to the world Raylan! Holy Moly, BPF 2/4/14, please be safe and sound little one!

    My Blog

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  • imageSouthernBellaKS:
    I commented. Somebody else commented in a way that I appreciated. :) But I kept my comment just focused on answering the question at hand and that I cried like a baby at my u/s last week.The response I got was a bit defensive, but eh.. whatevs.

    She was totally defensive! It took everything I had not respond, telling her she'll feel MUCH differently about the u/s should she ever suffer a m/c. I'm still holding myself back.

    I didn't appreciate her half-@ssed apology for our losses, either. I just added another person to my mental list of b!tches.

    I've decided it's best for me to stay far, far away from my BMB.

    It was a rough road, but Arlo Daniel was born April 1, 2013—and our second rainbow is due October 12, 2014.
  • imagepanacea05:

    imageSouthernBellaKS:
    I commented. Somebody else commented in a way that I appreciated. :) But I kept my comment just focused on answering the question at hand and that I cried like a baby at my u/s last week.The response I got was a bit defensive, but eh.. whatevs.

    She was otally defensive! It took everything I had not respond, telling her she'll feel MUCH differently about the u/s should she ever suffer a m/c. I'm still holding myself back.

    I didn't appreciate her half-@ssed apology for our losses, either. I just added another person to my mental list of b!tches.

    I've decided it's best for me to stay far, far away from my BMB.

    Hey, I maintain..she asked a question, and I answered it. If she took it defensively, that's her issue, not mine.


    IMG_2014
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • That thread really upset me, especially with how they treated someone who has had losses and was just giving her opinion.  I have a hard time going over there.

    That little flicker was the most wonderful thing I have seen in a long time.  Sigh, I'm just so happy I have this board and all these amazing women. 

  • imageSouthernBellaKS:
    imagepanacea05:

    imageSouthernBellaKS:
    I commented. Somebody else commented in a way that I appreciated. :) But I kept my comment just focused on answering the question at hand and that I cried like a baby at my u/s last week.The response I got was a bit defensive, but eh.. whatevs.

    She was otally defensive! It took everything I had not respond, telling her she'll feel MUCH differently about the u/s should she ever suffer a m/c. I'm still holding myself back.

    I didn't appreciate her half-@ssed apology for our losses, either. I just added another person to my mental list of b!tches.

    I've decided it's best for me to stay far, far away from my BMB.

    Hey, I maintain..she asked a question, and I answered it. If she took it defensively, that's her issue, not mine.

    Her SN seemed familiar to me when I was clicking on her post, so I think she must've p!ssed me off some other time, too. I'm going to keep my eye on her. ;) 

    It was a rough road, but Arlo Daniel was born April 1, 2013—and our second rainbow is due October 12, 2014.
  • I really wanted to belong over there but I just don't.  Even with my first pregnancy which was completely uneventful I cried like a baby because that little flicker meant that we were going to have a baby.  I don't really know what she expected to see from something that's the size of a raspberry.  I thought the OP was pretty rude, though.
    Lilypie Third Birthday tickers Please stay with us, Baby! BabyFruit Ticker BFP 8/4/11 Missed M/C @9wks D&C @12wks
  • imagejojo3020:
    I really wanted to belong over there but I just don't.  Even with my first pregnancy which was completely uneventful I cried like a baby because that little flicker meant that we were going to have a baby.  I don't really know what she expected to see from something that's the size of a raspberry.  I thought the OP was pretty rude, though.

    She was very rude, and I wish I had the balls to call her out--but that's not my style. PETRA!!!!!!! ;) 

    It was a rough road, but Arlo Daniel was born April 1, 2013—and our second rainbow is due October 12, 2014.
  • We are all a little different than a "normal" pregnant woman.

    & I agree with you about seeing baby on ultrasound...it gives reassurance every time. & the same goes for the doppler. If you haven't invested in one, it's a good purchase for mamas like us. 

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    Elonah [3], Bentley [1]

    BabyFruit Ticker
  • Wow, there really are some gems over there! :(
    Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
    Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Second Birthday tickers
  • Ugh, that post made me really mad! I wish I could put it in words and call them out for their douchy-ness! (I'm pretty sure this word doesn't exist and if it does, it's most likely misspelled. Sorry! Stick out tongue)
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  • For me, I do find myself kinda apathetic with the early ultrasounds. I think because I've always passed those with flying colors, but things still went to shiit later. So, seeing a hb at 7w is ok, but I don't walk out of that room pissing rainbows. I've even had a tech comment on my lack of squees. 

    The "big" ultrasound for me is the nt scan. I always bawl during it. Either bc it's awful news, or it's great news.  I've gotten in the habit of clearing my schedule for two weeks after the nt scan so allow healing time from the d+c. Even with this pg:nt scan is on the middle of march, so I pushed my vacation out to leave at the end of march. 


    BFP #1 via IUI ~ L (Fatal Birth Defect) 4/7/10
    BFP #2 via IUI ~ m/c

    BFP #3 via cancelled IUI ~ C (2lb 3oz; HELLP) 5/16/11

    BFP #4 via the natural (free!) way ~ E (8lb 11oz) 9/13/12

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  • imagedamabo80:

    For me, I do find myself kinda apathetic with the early ultrasounds. I think because I've always passed those with flying colors, but things still went to shiit later. So, seeing a hb at 7w is ok, but I don't walk out of that room pissing rainbows. I've even had a tech comment on my lack of squees. 

    The "big" ultrasound for me is the nt scan. I always bawl during it. Either bc it's awful news, or it's great news.  

    I never had a bad early one either....but 4 months ago my sons heart stopped beating, so seeing a beating heart in there of any size was very emotional for me. 

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers 

    CafeMom Tickers

    Married the love of my life 7/11/09 - Our first baby, Peyton Mark, was born sleeping 10/25/11 at 33 weeks - Our second baby, BFP 2/4/12, welcome to the world Raylan! Holy Moly, BPF 2/4/14, please be safe and sound little one!

    My Blog

  • imagePetunia844:
    imagedamabo80:

    For me, I do find myself kinda apathetic with the early ultrasounds. I think because I've always passed those with flying colors, but things still went to shiit later. So, seeing a hb at 7w is ok, but I don't walk out of that room pissing rainbows. I've even had a tech comment on my lack of squees. 

    The "big" ultrasound for me is the nt scan. I always bawl during it. Either bc it's awful news, or it's great news.  

    I never had a bad early one either....but 4 months ago my sons heart stopped beating, so seeing a beating heart in there of any size was very emotional for me. 

    I can totally understand that.

    Not too many people get weepy over seeing a normal shaped skull; I do. It's all about how our past experiences have shaped what we look towards in an u/s.  


    BFP #1 via IUI ~ L (Fatal Birth Defect) 4/7/10
    BFP #2 via IUI ~ m/c

    BFP #3 via cancelled IUI ~ C (2lb 3oz; HELLP) 5/16/11

    BFP #4 via the natural (free!) way ~ E (8lb 11oz) 9/13/12

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  • Seriously. I saw that post too and it pi$$ed me off. Even without having a loss, an u/s is a pretty cool thing. Makes me wonder about some people. They don't realize how much of a miracle having a baby really is, then again, I didn't realize it until after 2 losses, but still---it IS a miracle.
    6 & 2 year old, 2 losses
  • That post really just made me sad for them.  Although being Pgal comes with it's own special brand of suck, I like to see appreciating every day and every aspect of my pregnancy as a silver lining of sorts.  I can't wait until Monday when I see my little pumpkin on that screen, hopefully with a strong, beating heart!   

    Note: I realize that because my loss was relatively early, it's of course a lot easier to see a silver lining. But I can only speak from my own perspective here. 

    BFP #1: 10.28.11 - Natural M/C: 12.9.11 @9w3d
    BFP #2: 1.30.12 - missed m/c found on 2.27.12 - D&C 3.1.12 @8w 
    BFP #3: 1.02.13 / EDD 8.31.13 / It's a boy!  - Baby Henry born 8.14.13
    BFP #4: 9.28.14 / EDD 5.27.15 / It's a girl! 

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