Pity Party of 1
DawnHope
member
I lost my beloved father in law this week. The next day AF arrived which means my IUI with injectables was a bust. I'm convinced they triggered me too early.
Yesterday I came home and found out the seemingly routine blood test my insurance co requires before moving on to ART is going to cost me 600 dollars.
Crappy, crappy week. I took this month off from treatment because I am physically and mentally exhausted, but every second I feel like "should I be doing something else?" I hope to be that lucky person that gets the surprise BFP while waiting to move on. If this month doesn't net me a BFP, it's on to IVF, which I am terrified of.
I may need to also get off this site soon. I just keep reading so many sad stories like mine it's making me feel hopeless. If anyone has good news/a good story about a 40+ gal with a happy ending, I could use it.
Re: Pity Party of 1
I am so sorry that you are having such a rough go. My first IUI did not work out. It was so draining both physically and emotionally. After a forced month break, I had my spirit back and was ready to try again (IUI #2 is tomorrow).
So a happy 40+ story. A guy that I work with married his wife when she was 50. Of course they did DE but she did end up with a beautiful girl.
I have several friends with happy 40+ stories, all of whom did not have opportunity or ability to see an RE while ttc #1 so they just kept at it and they have ended up successful eventually. It took them a longer than everyone else, in most cases a year or more but they all moved on to get their bfp, most recently my friend delivered her daughter at 43, she was trying on and off for at least 3 years. That being said your totally allowed to have your pity party, sometimes I think it helps you to regroup and get your fighting gloves back on!
Me 41 DH 46 Not actively ttc, surprise BFP on 1/6/11! 4/1/11 m/c our sunshine at 16wks after complications from CVS test. TTC #2 **5th cycle 12/6/11 BFP! Missed m/c at 9 weeks 1/21/12, trisomy 14. Two Chemical PG 3/12&7/12
** BFP 8/16/12 beta #1 148! beta#2 407 beta #3 4000 u/s 9.10 1 lovely hb 126, Baby Boy is due 04/28/13!!
DOR and AMA
2/12-5/12: 4 IUI cycles = all BFN;
7/12: DE IVF # 1 (with ICSI)- 20R, 16M, 14F, 5DT of 2 blasts; 6 frosties = BFN;
Lupus anticoagulant initially high, then found to be normal on hematology consult;
Follow up testing in September all clear;
Started synthroid for "high normal" TSH;
FET # 1- late October 2012- BFP on FRER; beta # 1- 21(low), beta # 2- 48 (still low), beta # 3- 132, beta # 4- 1,293; beta # 5- 5,606; last beta- over 100,000. First u/s 11/21- heard heartbeat
12/12- Officially an OB patient!
Level 2 ultrasound at 20 weeks shows vasa previa and VCI
Referral to MFM and mandatory c section for delivery
Beautiful baby girl born at 34 weeks
Finally home after 15 day NICU stay!
Trying for sibling: FET # 2- May 2014; beta 5/31, BFN
FET #3, early July 2014; beta 7/14, BFN
DE IVF # 2- August 2014; 14R, 13M, 11F, 5dt of 2 blasts (3 AA), 5 frosties = BFN
FET #4- December 2014, yet another BFN
Dr. KK work up shows borderline uterine blood flow, elevated NK cells, and MTHFR mutation (homozygous for c677t)
Added baby aspirin, prednisone, supplements, Metanx, and intralipids
Switched to large clinic for final attempt; had endometrial receptivity testing in January; FET March 2015 = yet another BFN
Likely OAD- NBC