Does anyone else have a messy family dynamic? How are you planning to deal with this sort of thing? If you've got children already, what was most helpful for you immediately after they were born?
I feel like I cannot even think about this right now, but my mom is already saying she wants to come up (she lives about 12 hours away) the week before the baby is born and stay two weeks after. And made some comment about how she can't afford a hotel, which felt like angling to stay with DH and I.
I kept telling her on the phone that all I can think about right now is just getting through this pregnancy and do not plan on thinking about birth, etc. until the third trimester but she's being unusually pushy about it. I love my mom, but we're not terribly close and I feel like it would stress me out to have her around... especially if she wants to stay with us.It's already stressing me out just thinking about it. She doesn't get along with DH, not to mention my mom being here would probably signal to his mother that it would be okay if SHE was here, too, since she lives in another state, as well. Let's not even talk about my parents' ugly divorce.
I guess I just don't know how I'm supposed to field these kinds of questions this early, or even what my answer should be. I have NO IDEA what to expect or what I'll need emotionally/mentally/physically at that time, for all my instinct tells me that I am going to want to be able to bond with my new family and not need extended family drama, at least not 24/7.
I appreciate the advice. I wouldn't be asking if I didn't think this wasn't going to come up again, and soon. I feel ridiculous but my family is kind of ridiculous.