Pregnant after a Loss


Today I am 5 wks and 3 days and can not stop worrying. I have had two miscarriages both at 6 wks. I have my first ultra sound in a couple weeks but I can't quit thinking about the possibility of losing another pregnancy. I want to get excited so badly but I can't because I am so scared I am going to lose this little one. My husband is great and always reminds me there is a bigger picture but its just so hard to watch friends and family have all their babies without any problems and mine are so complicated. To top it off my emotions are crazy and all I want to do sometimes is cry and I NEVER cry. I just really need some ideas on ways to distract myself. I only work 25 hrs. a week so I have a lot of free time, most of which i spend running to the bathroom to make sure I haven't started bleeding.I  am so grateful to be pregnant it's also so hard at the same time. Thanks for reading.       

Re: Advice?

  • ((Big Hugs)) Being PgAL is tough. I dont think the worry ever goes away but it does get easier! Hang in there. Maybe take on a hobby to keep you busy. I'd worry more in my free time too.
    Married since 06/2004, TTC since 01/2011

    BFP #1 and M/C 5/2011

    BFP #2 7/1/2011, Blighted ovums officially diagnosed at 9w6d, D&C 8/19/2011.

    BFP #3 12/7/2011, EDD 8/15/2012, Harper Lorelai born 8/09/12

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  • I agree- PGAL is really hard- Can your OB order betas so that gives you a little peace of mind- I remember very early in my pregnancy where I called my OB almost in tears because I wasn't feeling pg anymore- I think I was less than 6w. They ordered betas for me and that made me feel much better- GL and big hugs!
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  • ((hugs)) Everything you're feeling is completely normal for being PgAL. We've all been exactly where you are now. I don't think the fear will ever go away, but as pp said, it does get better. Is there anyway your doctor could get you in sooner for a peace of mind u/s? I went in at 5w4d for my first and even though we weren't able to see much, we still got to see the sac in the right place measuring on track. It did so much to easy my nerves.

    I would also suggest picking up a hobby, or just get out of the house. Spend the day at a museum, go shopping, have lunch with a friend, go to the library and read a book there. Go somewhere without easy access to a bathroom where you'll be tempted to check. I know it's hard, but just keep repeating the PgAL motto, "Today I am pregnant, and I love my baby!"
    photo e9455f4d-9751-469e-a19f-460104cd2e5c.jpg photo jan15.jpg
    BFP #1 5/20/10 Natural MC at 5w4d 5/28/10
    BFP #2 11/3/10; BO at u/s 10w6d 12/16/10; Natural MC 1/7/11; D&C 4/21/11
    BFP #3 10/27/11 Please stick, LO!! 2/6/12 It's a Girl! Alexis Grace born 6/29/12
    BFP#4 4/27/14 Stick, stick, stick!! 8/11/14 It's a Boy! Evan Wesley born 1/8/15
    "Patience is waiting. Not passively waiting. That is laziness. But to keep going when the going is hard and slow, that is patience."  Let it Be (blog)My BFP Charts
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  • It is really hard. My anxiety goes down a tiny bit each day that things go well, though. There are certainly relapses, but in general, knowing things are going forward helps. Like pp said, maybe you can get in early to see the doctor? I had a freak out last week when my symptoms disappeared, and I called, had a mini-breakdown on the phone, and they got me right in. The doctor was way more understanding of my stress than I expected, and they sent me for an ultrasound. It doesn't mean I'm "relaxed" about it now, but it helped. {{hugs}} This is a great board for support through this time. 
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  • ((Hugs)) It's so tough. Especially coming up on milestones like that. My first baby died at 10 1/2 weeks but my pregnancy lasted until almost 12 weeks. I am coming up on that milestone and it has me totally freaked out. I go back to the Dr. at 10 weeks for a routine physical and I think i'm going to demand a sonogram to put my mind at ease. For now the only advice I have is try not to worry if you don't have any severe cramping or bleeding. DH and I try to go out to lunch, dinner, or movies or just spend time with friends and family that don't know to pass the time a bit. We decided, though, that the outcome will be the same whether we are excited or whether we don't get excited about the baby. So for right now, we decided to be excited, just between the two of us.
    First BFP April 2011, EDD 01/11/11, MMC June 20, 2011 D&C June 20, 2011 Second BFP September 23, 20011 CP diagnosed September 26, 2011 PAL/PGAL welcome
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  • (((hugs))) Everyone covered it pretty well. You are not alone in these feelings & I truly remember being where you are & freaking out every day. I still have my moments, but they have become less over time & I am hoping that eventually I will not be stressed out all the time. Try to get out there & go for a walk when you are super stressed out or do something that will take your mind off of being pregnant.

    The PGAL Mantra has helped me immensely as well "Today I am pregnant & I love my baby" I say it every morning when I wake up.

    Best of luck to you! You are not alone :)

    BFP #1 2/8/2008 - Evan born 10/3/2008 via c/s @ 38wks
    BFP #2 12/31/2010 (EDD 9/1/11) -- Natrual m/c 1/9/10
    BFP #3 12/20/2011 - EDD 8/25/12
    u/s 1/6/12 - HB & beautiful bean
    A/S 4/2 - It's a Girl!!!
    RCS on 8/20/12
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