Pregnant after a Loss

WWPgAL do?

We're telling our families next weekend that we're expecting. I'll be 14.5 weeks. I know that as soon as we tell my mom, everyone will know. So I told DH I wanted to beat her to the punch and announce on FB then instead of waiting for the gender.

He says that everyone who we'd want to know should already know and if they aren't "important enough" to know then they can eventually find out.

My reasoning is that it's our news and our happiness after the pain we've been through. I want to be the one to tell our friends and the family that we don't really talk to but is on FB. I want the news to come from me, not my mother.

Would you do it or not? 

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Re: WWPgAL do?

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    I say if that's what you feel comfortable with, then do it. It's your news to share so share it on your terms.
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    I'm a horrible person to ask since I'm SOOOO anti-posting pregnancy things on FB (we haven't said anything on FB at all and have asked all our friends and family not to post anything on FB)...the first time anyone on FB hears about our pregnancy that isn't close enough to have heard by that point will be when we post a picture of LO after he is born.  I said exactly what your DH said...if they aren't important enough for us to have told in person, over the phone, or with an email, then they aren't important enough for us to tell and I'm not going to go out of my way to post it on FB.

    That being said, if the only people you are friends with on FB are close friends and family and not a bunch of randoms, acquaintances, people you haven't talked to since high school, then announcing on FB is basically telling only those people who are "important enough" to know...However, DH and I both have a bunch of random people on our FBs that wouldn't know we were pregnant if we didn't post, and if G_d forbid something went wrong, I wouldn't want to have to post a giant status update and tell them just in case we got a stray, "How's the pregnancy?" or "How far along are you now" post from one of them after the fact.  If that makes sense.  (DH and I have a mutual friend who announced on FB, had a 2nd tri m/c, and then had to announce that on FB too because she was getting a lot of, "Hey, post a new belly pic," or "Hey, how's future baby doing" posts after her m/c because a lot of her FB friends were not close enough to her IRL to know what had happened.)

    I've read some of your posts about your mom and I think you have to take into account (just IMHO) why you'd be announcing on FB.  Is it because you genuinely want to do it that way, or is it because you want to beat your mom, who you sometimes have a strained relationship with, to the punch?  If it's the latter, then I think your DH's desires to not do the FB announcement should outweigh the "beating mom to the punch" line of thought.  If it's the former, then I think you should do it.

    GL with whatever you decide!

    Lilypie Third Birthday tickers 
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers 

    BFP #1 6/28/11 ~ EDD 3/7/12 ~ m/c 7/15/11 at 6w2d
    BFP #2 8/29/11 ~ EDD 5/12/12. 4/25/12: Our take home baby is here!
     BFP #3 8/27/13 ~ EDD 5/11/14.  4/27/14:  Our second take home baby is here!

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    -Butting in -


    That is all.

    Oh, wait, no it's not.  NoahBear is almost far enough along to tell the family.  SSSQQQQUUUUUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    As for your real question, do what makes YOU feel the most comfortable.

    -Butting back out-

    BFP#1 4/17/10...EDD 1/6/11...M/C 5/28/10 BFP#2 11/19/10...EDD 8/4/11 Squeaker born 7/30.
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    GL with whatever you decide!

    Aside from the announcement and gender, I don't plan on posting much pregnancy related other than answering if asked. I'm very slective about who I put on my FB and there aren't any random people who I have just put on there because I met them a couple times.

    Actually, my TB friends outweigh my IRL FB friends. Lol. I just feel like my friends and family who don't know should know from one of us. No matter what we say to my mom, she'll put something up.

    I'm also the type who'd put something up if we had a loss, even if we hadn't announced because I don't like to keep it hidden.

    The majority of people who are friends who don't know are ones back in KS who I don't really talk to other than on FB but we do talk often. 

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    Well I'm no expert because I don't even do FB at all, (yes I am a loser!) but if your mom is just going to blab to everybody anyway, I'd rather do it first. That way at least it comes from you!
    BabyFruit Ticker
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    I personally think it is a good idea if you won't get the chance to tell with your mom knowing. I think it can be a good way to let people know. When I finally want my extended family to know I will be letting them know that way, just b/c it is easier and all at once. GL whichever choice you make!
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    I feel the same way, I have 7 brothers and sisters... I would have loved to announce to everyone at the same time, bit logistically it wasn't possible, I told my parents and sent a text to my siblings within 5 minutes to beat my mom to the punch... Would do it again exactly the same way
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    Lost our first angel, 10/24/08 7w6d
    Proud mama to Cameron
    Lost our second angel, 2/16/11 8w
    Proud mama to Melanie
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