How Do I End Co-Sleeping?

jenna731

My DD is 6 months old and has slept in my bed since birth.  She still wakes up multiple times at night and wants/needs me to nurse her back to sleep.  I have to go to bed when she does at night because she won't sleep alone. She also wakes up shortly after I get out of bed in the morning to get ready for work which makes for difficult mornings.  I know she cannot be getting enough sleep and I'm not either.  I don't want to break her heart by casting her out of my bed, but I don't think it'll be easier down the road either.  If you've gone through a similar situation, please share how/what you did.

Thanks,

Jenna, mom to Megan (2) and Anna (6 mos.)

Zenya

do you have room to side-car your crib to the bed?  That sometimes works.  So she can get used to her own space while still having you close by.

I couldn't really transfter my son until he was 2.  He just really needed me there with him.  It got better after a year though (the waking decreased).  

Zenya

I did get him to go to sleep before us though.  that was just a process.  Lie with him until he was asleep... go nurse him back down whenever he woke up.  I spent a lot of time going up and down the hall to him which was a PITA but he needed to go to sleep around 7 and I couldn't deal.

jenna731

Zenya, your DS shares a b-day with my DD!  I can't imagine having had her in my bed up until just a few months ago.  We do have room for a sidecar and have tried that, but she just cries the moment we put her in there, even if she was previously sound asleep.  SO of course I also worry about her waking my 2 year old in the next room.

Zenya

I never really thought I'd cosleep for as long as I did!  But DS was seriously just an extension of me.  Just would cry like he was being tortured if he woke up alone.  And we don't CIO so I guess I had no option.  It was fine though - it's amazing what becomes normal after a while!

r9stedt

We co-slept until about 7 or 8 months. ? I moved his pack and play into the living room. Our bedroom was right next to it. ?I would bathe, rock, and read him and lay him down. ?He had to fuss him self to sleep a couple of days, but up until now, he has been an awesome sleep since we moved him out of our bed.

?

CIO isn't for everyone, but that is the only way it worked for us. ?We tried everything else before that. ?I, like you, had to go to bed when he was and he was waking when I was. ?

?

GL!?

Lea LaJeunesse-Askren

Zenya:

do you have room to side-car your crib to the bed?  That sometimes works.  So she can get used to her own space while still having you close by.

I couldn't really transfter my son until he was 2.  He just really needed me there with him.  It got better after a year though (the waking decreased).  

 

Ditto this. We kept trying but she just wasn't ready (and honestly, neither were we!) Now she loves her bed though. E never was a co-sleeper. She hates it!

goodhartedmommy

I'd find a way to make the side-carred crib more like your bed. Sleep with her crib sheet for a few nights so it smells like you. Give her one of your shirts to snuggle with until she falls asleep, or let her keep it through the night if you're comfortable with that. My DD was an awful nightwaker until about 12 months, but she's really a good sleeper now at 20 months. It actually is more normal for them to wake up frequently during the night than to sleep straight through. If you look at all primates, not just humans, they are nursed back to sleep frequently through the night until a couple of years old, and nightwakings are part of what we're supposed to do. I know that doesn't really make it any easier to be missing out on all of that sleep, but hopefully it does bring you a bit of comfort to know that it's normal.

 And my DS will be 3 in March and is still co-sleeping