Yelling poll

Zenya

Do you consider yourself to have anxiety problems?[Poll]

Zenya

My poll is b/c my son is having anxiety about his library at school and my husband 'hinted' that my anxiety about his anxiety was making it worse (duh).  So today is library day and I'm making an enormous effort to change my approach to him and notice I am not struggling with yelling at all.  Even during real trigger moments (like my DD refusing to get dressed, flailing on the floor and the baby screaming at the same time... all while we're about to be late for school).

So maybe.. there is a link.  idk. 

shopgirl78

Zenya:

My poll is b/c my son is having anxiety about his library at school and my husband 'hinted' that my anxiety about his anxiety was making it worse (duh).  So today is library day and I'm making an enormous effort to change my approach to him and notice I am not struggling with yelling at all.  Even during real trigger moments (like my DD refusing to get dressed, flailing on the floor and the baby screaming at the same time... all while we're about to be late for school).

So maybe.. there is a link.  idk. 

I can see the correlation.  When I am worried or anxious about something and the kids are pestering me, I am much more likely to yell.

But I am pretty chill otherwise and don't yell that often. 

veloelle

Do you think your son might have anxiety issues unrelated to you and just part of who he is? I ask because of his food issues and the extreme anxiety about the books, that he might just be a more worrisome kid that translates into anxiety/control over a situation when he feels like he can't control his worries.

Jodi&Joe

...changing my approach...

I need more info.

What are you doing differently?  Is it something that you feel you can maintain?

I know I had a GREAT day with the kids yesterday.  A few bumps in the road but I was so chill and handled it really well (if I can pat myself on the back for once).  I actually said to Joe last night "Today was a day that made me feel like I could actually rock being a SAHM!"  But I know it's not something that I could EVER maintain long term.  Or even short term.  I think I have a one day threshold!  LOL

And of course it's linked.  When I'm high strung, they act out.  It's a vicious cycle.  One that is REALLY hard to break. 

Good job on keeping your cool!  You got this! 

Zenya

veloelle:

Do you think your son might have anxiety issues unrelated to you and just part of who he is? I ask because of his food issues and the extreme anxiety about the books, that he might just be a more worrisome kid that translates into anxiety/control over a situation when he feels like he can't control his worries.

I don't know that it's anxiety specifically or at least not how I would think of it.  Like he's outgoing and confident but he kind of gets 'stuck' on things?  Like this library thing he is STUCK on and then it's like an hour later and he's STILL thinking about it.  

Jodi re: approach I changed it specific to this problem  like I emailed his teacher for help... reached out to other friends for advice etc.  I had been doing the 'JUST RETURN IT B/C I SAID SO' thing (not literally but just trying to kind of minimize it I guess for him?)

Zenya

I did request a book from the library though on how to handle worries (like a self help book for kids kind of..  I think someone recommended it on herE)

winomom22

I find myself yelling if we are pressed for time or running late and usually DD2 is whining/crying and DD1 isn't listening or following directions so this adds to the stress.