Nothing to do with being prego...just needed to vent somewhere

tkmiraglia

Currently, my husband only works part time. It's an awful job that he hates...but still a job. I do searches every day for jobs for him to apply to and he applies to probably four or five a day. This has been going on for a while. 

Lately, though, he's getting  more and more down on himself. With LO's due date getting closer, I know he's feeling the pressure to get a better job. I understand why... and part of me agrees. But, I hate that he's so down on himself about it. He gets so upset about it.

If he wasn't trying or didn't care then I'd be upset with him. But, he does. And he's so stressed out about it. And I don't know how to take that stress down for him.

I know things will work themselves out. He just needs to keep a positive attitude and keep getting his name out there. I just don't know how to help him see that.  

AugustSkye

I'm sorry you are going through this. But, like you said, at least he is working. DH is a seasonal employee and is currently laid off for the winter. We're putting his application in EVERYWHERE, but no luck yet. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for obvious reasons, plus I'm going CRAZY having to deal with him every day. Haha!

Good luck and hope your husband finds a new job soon!

rachel.wenger

Ugh, I know how this one goes...poor guy.  I'm sure he's freaking out too wanting to make sure that he is ready for the baby to come too.

Has he tried any local employment agencies to see if they can help?  Also, network is HUGE in this sucky job market.  I would tell him to make sure to do follow up calls with every employer that he applies with...and be a pain in the a$$ about it.  He needs to make himself known to employers.  I worked as a hiring manager at a law firm for a few years.  Some of the BEST and most amazing people that I hired were relentless on follow up calls after their applications and interviews. 

Good luck to you and your DH!

FarmvilleLover

I'm sorry (to both PPs actually) that work stress is an issue right now.  It is a really tough economy and with a baby on the way it's got to compound the stress.  It sounds like you're all on the same page and doing the responsible things though, I really hope it pays of for you guys and very soon.

Hang in there ladies. 

Sascha3

rachel.wenger:

Ugh, I know how this one goes...poor guy.  I'm sure he's freaking out too wanting to make sure that he is ready for the baby to come too.

Has he tried any local employment agencies to see if they can help?  Also, network is HUGE in this sucky job market.  I would tell him to make sure to do follow up calls with every employer that he applies with...and be a pain in the a$$ about it.  He needs to make himself known to employers.  I worked as a hiring manager at a law firm for a few years.  Some of the BEST and most amazing people that I hired were relentless on follow up calls after their applications and interviews. 

Good luck to you and your DH!

I agree with this.  In this economy, just applying is not enough.  You need to stand out.  I am a firm believer in always applying in person, not online.  I just think it stands out to the person who may hire you.  Or dropping off a resume.  And the follow up phone call is crucial.  You have to get ballsy and ASK for the job basically. 

My husband has had a good year.  He has a job, but was keeping options open.  He was almost a pest with following up.  He got 2 out of 3 jobs that he applied for (still waiting on the third) but turned them down for not meeting salary requirements.  Then he went to his current boss and told them and asked for a raise and got it.  He also asked for a promotion, and when a position came available, he got it.  I don't think I could be as persistent and aggressive as he was, but it showed me that persistence and not being afraid to ask DO pay off.  I think his persistence impressed those above him.  Not to mention, he still occasionally texts and stays in touch with the other people he networked with this year, and they have kept communication open with him, and have visited him at his current restaurant.  Networking is crucial and cannot be underestimated.  People hire who they know and like.

Edit:  I just realized I sound like I am bragging about him, I am just really proud.  But I hope I didn't sound insensitive.  I just wanted to give examples of how important it is to go above and beyond in this economy.  I know some areas and industries have been hit much harder than his has, and times are very tough.  It is good that he cares so much and I am sure things will turn around for him with his persistence and commitment to keep trying as he has been:)

Kristine Schilling

Sometimes you can't help him see it and feel better about the situation. You can however do other things to make him feel better. Such as extra cuddles, back scratches, reminding him you appriciate him. Reduce the general stress levels by making him feel good in other ways.

With my DH unemployed it has been extremely hard for him to feel good about himself. I just remind him regularly how lucky I am to have such an awesome DH. (I read him some of the horror stories from the nest boards too)

tkmiraglia

Thanks, Ladies.

kaelasierra

We're in the same boat. DH applies to jobs all the time--he has a part time job that pays okay, but he really wants me to be able to NOT work and take care of DD all the time. It stresses him out and he gets so down on himself. I hope that things turn around for you guys soon! I remind myself how blessed I am that DH wants to provide and will work crappy jobs just to make sure he can. We're the lucky ones.