Babies: 0 - 3 Months

You people that are "supposedly" having sex.....

WHERE and WHEN is this mysterious event occuring??  Particularly those of you that also have older children....when the heck are you able to have sex?

My 7 w/o is still not falling asleep until midnight (after 4 hours of crying & us trying to rock & nurse  her to sleep), and our toddler is up at 7 am, with the baby up twice during the night (and going back to sleep after eating IF we're LUCKY).  By the time the baby is asleep, I know I have maybe 2 hours before I have to wake up again to feed her.  I chose sleep last night.  And also I'm not too groovy with having sex with the baby in the bassinet next to the bed.  Plus our bed is creaky and after 4 hours of trying to get her to sleep, I really don't want to wake her up.

Anyone else on board with me?

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Re: You people that are "supposedly" having sex.....

  • Our baby is in her own crib, sleeping through the night (for the most part), and our 3 yo seems to have gotten over getting up every time the baby does--so I have no excuses, other than I feel fat and gross and have no desire to do anything that requires me to be naked around another person!

    Also, my c/s incision got infected, so that's been hurting like hell and not helping matters. 

    Big A 06-07-08 Little A 11-11-11
  • We are in the same boat with you. LO is 8 weeks today. Doesn't want to go to bed till midnight. Then has reversed back to sleeping 3 hour stretches BUT he won't sleep in the RNP anymore, only in the bed in my arms! I'm exhausted, still sore from delivery after the episiotomy, and not into it. We still haven't jumped the band wagon on that one!

    LO can't sleep in his crib because of the reflux. We've tried elevating but doesn't work. He just wants to be with mommy! HELP!!! Last night I cried to sleep for the first time. DH was sick sleeping in the guest room and I had LO all by myself and tried to nurse at 9:15 and go to bed afterwards.....didn't work. He screamed and was wide awake. Of course now he's sleeping at 11:55am!

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  • with the reflux ever tried letting the baby sleep in the car seat ive seen that it sometimes works and it may give you some time to sleep!!
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  • Mine is mostly anxiety about what happens as a result of sex. I had a c-section and I am almost 8wks out, so I know I can start doing it. You would think I would be major horn dog since being on pelvic rest since week 23, but I am so paranoid about getting pregnant again, I am waiting for my birth control to kick in( I am just on day 2 today), and even then I feel like my husband should wear 2 condoms and get a vasectomy. I am breastfeeding too, so that is supposed to be some sort of birth control.  Haha! Can you tell I had a really difficult pregnancy?
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  • imageRachaelA:
    Yeah I don't understand how so many people are just ready to jump right in. My vag still feels broken even though its perfectly healed!

    lol I am just trying once a week until something feels normal. :P

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  • One thing that works for us is morning sex before DD is awake. Yes its quick & not that comfortable for me yet but the more you have the more you want (or so I am told). Don't worry, we'll all get the groove back soon.
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  • I'm 6weeks PP and we've had sex a couple times.The first time was really because I felt bad for DH and I must say it was quite uncomfortable.We kind of snuck it in after LO had a feeding and fell asleep.We left him in the living room (which is like 20feet away)and gave it ago.The second time was much better and I even enjoyed it (TMI).I was lucky when I delivered there was no damage whatsoever to my vag area.It only was sore for a day or two.

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  • If you are ready then you somehow find the time. Lord knows its not the most romantic or Long... but thats why they invented the quickie :)

  • I miss sex, but I miss sleep more. Between 2-3 hour feedings, evening cluster feedings and my LO's refusal to nap during the day for more than 20 mins a stretch, if I have to choose between nookie and sleep, I choose sleep.


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  • I am so glad that this post exists and that so many of you ladies are sharing the same feelings I have. Though I am only 4 weeks PP so my reason for no sex at this point is I have not been given the OK by my doctor. 

    My DH things I am using the 6 week rule as an excuse to not sleep with him. But even if I could have sex now Im not sure I would be. Like you all said, I think I would chose sleep over it! LO hasn't been sleeping much during the day and doesn't finally go to sleep at night till midnight(ish) and it usually is after a feeding and then crying/screaming for awhile. So by the time I get to lay down myself I am so run down that the last thing I want to do is try and have sexy time.

    Plus its hard to have sexy time when you feel like a blob. lol. I feel like I constantly covered in and smell like breast milk and baby body fluids....gross...probably....but hey I am a mommy now, my priorities have changed!

    Also, never thought about doing it with LO right next to us, kinda creeps me out now! (he has a cosleeper attached to our bed) 

  • We definitely arent having sex yet (only 13 days PP), but we've been doing other stuff. Last night we put the kids to bed around 8:30, then there was about 2 hours before the baby woke up to eat, so we had some "alone time". We mostly just talked/kissed/cuddled, but hubby got other stuff done too. (Sorry TMI.)

    I don't know, I feel like there is time if you want there to be, but trust me, most nights I am not in the mood at all...Sleep

    ETA: we have done it for years with kids sleeping in the room with us (when they were younger, lol). You do what you have to do. The kid is too young to be traumatized.

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