Questions from a sleep-deprived FTM

mbgrobmyer

Anyone out there with a baby who takes a pacifier (who needs it with avengence until he can suck on his fingers safely without cutting his mouth) and its the only way to soothe him, but all night long plays the binky game of baby pushing it out, mommy puts it back in therefore destroying all of my sleep?  I haven't slept for more than 45 minutes in a chunk in 4 days. 

Also, my DS (amazing to say this)  is beautiful but he doesn't want to be put down by anyone.  If you put him down in anything, bed, boppy, etc, he screams.  I just feel slightly at my wits end because even if he sleeping in my arms, if I put him down at all even asleep, he will wake up screaming.  DH and I took turns doing the binky dance and then the rock the rocking cradle dance. I am starting to become afraid I will fall asleep with him in my arms but I don't know what to do. 

 I also am well aware that I am expecting way too much for my 3 day old son to be not cranky and crying but I didn't realize he would cry all the time he is awake. I figured at least some of the time he would be completely checking out the world.  It seems everything I am doing for him, with him, to him is making him furious and so he screams. 

 I am just feeling frustrated and these hormones are kind of messing me around. 

 TIA for your input advice or tips to someone who doesn't know how to deal with this. 

kclear

I'm a FTM as well so I only have limited knowledge but I read the Happiest Baby on the Block and watched the DVD as well. It has already helped me so much. The calming techniques really do work and it was helpful to know that for a lot of babies a tight swaddle is best. I now wrap DS up tightly before bed and he sleeps soundly for 3.5-4 hours.

mbgrobmyer

Yeah my LO is already swaddled....its the sucking reflex that I can't seem to calm....

smilelari

this is all so normal.  luckily this stage is short.  we bed share and nurse side lying which gets me so much more sleep.  you could also try encouraging her to suck her thumb instead.  where does lo sleep?  if it's not right next to your bed you might also try that so that when the paci comes out you can just reach over to put it back instead of getting out of bed

has your milk come in?  if not, he probably is wanting to nurse when he's awake

Sarahcakes29

First of all,  you have a three-day-old baby and you're doing great!  My son is six days old and we are in a similar situation; except my DH is being *really* by the book about using a binky so we don't even have that.  At the hospital, we just had myself, DH & the bassinet to hold him and he screamed each and every single time he was put down in it.  He's the same way at home.  We've had very limited, sporadic success with the bouncer, carseat, swing...but nights are hard.  Right now, DH & I take shifts on the couch sleeping with him propped up skin-to-skin on our chests.  We are slowly trying to introduce the rocker/napper that came with our pack-n-play and only two nights ago was able to have him there next to our bed for maybe 1-3 hours.  Swaddling seems to help a TON.  I'm ordering the Happiest Baby on the Block dvd from Amazon today, heard great things about it.

wwhickok

First off it's nice to see that someone else has a very young LO, seems like everyone else has at least a 2 mo old. DS is 9 days old and I'm completely in love, but I feel myself get frustrated at night because it seems to be the only time he doens't want to sleep. DH tries very hard to try and help me out at night, but he works all week so he's not as helpful as I would like. I must say that I am guilty of co-sleeping with DS and wrapping my arm around him, this seems to get him to sleep faster. He is up every 2 hours almost like clockwork for a feeding and to be changed. I was so tired this morning that I broke down and gave him a small bottle of formula, because it take 10 minutes to feed a bottle vs the 30-40 minutes to nurse. Just think that this is just a phase and the hard work will all be worth it and it'll be over in a few weeks. Thats what I keep telling myself, if I didn't, I don't know if I'd be able to make it.

beedawn

The pacifier game is no fun! We played that our first week at home. It gets better! What type of pacifier are you using? The soothies from the hospital are made to fall out. My pediatrician told me to get a pacimal that way it wont fall out, or if it does LO can still get it back in his mouth. DS will sleep almost anywhere during the day but at night wont sleep unless his swaddled in his pack n play.

ACAsomeday

I am totally going through the same thing right now.  Last night I tried BFing in the lying down position and kept LO in bed with us and LO and I both slept SO much better.  When I get up to nurse him, no matter how tight the swaddle, he seems to wake up the second I put him in his PnP.  We have been doing a bedshare PnP combo but have only gotten him to sleep in the PnP for 1 shift out of the 3 that he usually gives us at night. Also, for some reason he has no problem sleeping during the day!! ahh!

As far as being held.  Ive only managed to put him down for 10 minute stretches 1-2x a day in the swing without him getting fussy.  My SIL's who have 4 boys and 3 boys respectively, all 5 y/o and under say this is totally normal for a baby this age. It helps me feel a little better, if not any less exhausted!  Hope this helps!!