Baby Showers
Weird Shower Invitation Request...
in Baby Showers
Ive never posted on this board before, but I thought this was interesting. My mom was invited to a baby shower and it listed where the girl was registered, and also said "in lieu of a card, please write 'Jane' a note in your favorite storybook." is it just me, or does this seem shamelessly tacky? I mean, I guess I could see if she wanted books instead of gifts, but I'd hardly find a book a comparable replacement for a card. You can find cards for $0.99, a good book is going to run at least $5.00. I don't know, I just thought it was interesting and a little tacky.
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Re: Weird Shower Invitation Request...
Its very common around here..but yes, a lot of people think its tacky.
If your mom wants to comply, tell her to hit up a dollar store. Some of them actually have a nice selection.
Look! I put the diaper on the baby!
Ha! I didn't even think of that. Everyone loves "Good Night Moon" and you end up with 5 copies...
It's a pretty common request in my area. I won't be doing that because it's something that is usually forgotten about and some people just prefer to get cards.
I think it's a bad idea because of this, and not to mention you are basically asking for another gift which could offend your guests.
I think if the mom to be wants books, she should just register for them.
Hi - just lurking this morning but wanted to say we did this for my SIL 4 years ago when she was pregnant with my niece and everyone really loved the idea, since it builds up the baby's library of her loved ones favorite stories. I don't think she got duplicates of anything. My niece loves to bring out some of her books and read them, especially the notes people wrote in them for her. We thought since cards are always thrown away, she would have something she could hold onto to remember people who are no longer with us (aunts, grandmas, etc.).
But it's a personal preference really. I'm sure my MIL and my mom will do the same thing for me.
Fifty dollars!? wth!!
I still don't see why people think they can validate this with "just buy a cheap book".See, what happens with me is I look at the cheap books and think "eww, these look awful". Then I convince myself that "well, what is another couple of dollars for a book I like?". Then, it's a couple more and a couple more, next thing I know I am spending $12 for a book that I'm not embarrassed to give someone instead of spending a couple of bucks for a card that I love. If you want books, register for books. If you want to buy someone books, buy them books. You don't have to tell people "Oh, btw, I don't want some stupid card, spend some more money and buy the baby a book---I mean, it's only a couple more dollars and only communists hate reading books to babies..are you a communist?"
Not to mention the hypocrisy involved with telling a toddler why it's ok for other people to write in books, but not her.
He's the single greatest thing I've done in my life and reminds me daily of how fun (and funny) life can be. He's turned out pretty swell for having such a heartless and evil mother.
I think it's on the tacky side.
I registered for a bunch of books, and many of my guests bought me one along with a gift.
I mean, I guess if you're going to ask for books instead of cards, you should probably register for a bunch so you don't get a lot of dups.
Yes.
Plus, I always set a budget for the gift like "Okay I'll spend $60 on the baby gift." Then I spend $60 on something nice, completely forgetting about the card because cards are always an afterthought. Then I realize I have to spend $10 more on a book. Sure, $10 isn't a lot on it's own - but it ups what you spent by like 15%. I hate that.
I usually "forget" to bring my book.
I agree with the previous poster. I don't want to bring someone a crappy 1.99 book I found in the clearance section at a Walmart. If I am going to purchase a book I want to get someone a good, classic story with nice illustrations, hopefully hard bound so it does not get ruined as quickly. That can be up to 15.00. I have never spent more that .99 on a card as they all just get thrown away. I did bring a book once and took the 10.00-15.00 off the price of the gift I had planned on purchasing.
Plus you have to try to be creative enough to come up with a book that they are not going to get 4 copies of. Scratch Good Night, Moon, Where the Wild Things Are, The Cat in the Hat, etc.
In my experience, it is the host who makes these requests and the mother-to-be has no idea that the guests are being asked to bring a book.
whats the big deal...
you can get a book for 99 cents.. A nice card is alot more $$$. I am going to ask for books not cards.. after my wedding i kept a few cards out around my house then threw them all away.. i think its a great idea.. you are not forced to buy a book if you dont have the money for a book you dont have to worry about it...
There should NEVER be any sort of gift info. or requests put in invitations.
Registry info. should be left to word of mouth only, or talk to the host who sent you the card when you RSVP, they should have the registry info. handy.
Asking for books instead of cards is tacky too. I don't follow directions like that and the person will get a card...they can suck it and buy their own books.
Yeah I was invited to a shower back in Sept. and during the meal at a restaurant the host went around collecting $26 from all the guests. $26 covered the brunch and room rental fee. There was NOTHING put in the invitation about having to help pay for the shower, I was pissed! I only had a $20 on me and had to leave the restaurant after the meal to walk 5 block over to an ATM to pull out another $20 to cover my cost. The host had a checklist of guests and who had paid, who hadn't and who needed change etc. It was beyond tacky.
....I would also like to point out that this was shower #2 for child #2. Her first child turns 2 in a couple weeks. All sorts of tackiness involved with that shower, I only went because she's a good friend but clueless on etiquette.
That is SO weird!! I dont think I would have paid, how terrible!! I was in a wedding a few months ago, and at the rehearsal dinner the waitress stopped me as I was leaving. She told me that I had to cover my pop, that it was not covered in the bill. WTF.
I bought a knock-off book from the dollar store last time I was asked to bring a book in lieu of a card. I didn't read the book until I was on my way to the shower and then realized it was a promotional book sponsored by a fast food company that advertised their food. Haha!
Another time the shower was for a coworker who I knew only mildly. I felt so strange writing a message in the book because I knew that two years down the road then the kid asks "Who is Mintea" the mom will have no clue!
DD #1: 2012; MMC: 2014; DD #2: 2015; It's a boy! 3/31/2018
Oh look, here comes the teacher who touts literacy and says what a fantastic idea it is!
Guess what? I'm a teacher too and I still think it's tacky as all get out. I buy people books because I want to buy them books, not because someone tells me to. My son just turned a year old and literally has over 200 books ranging from board books to middle-school level. I love buying books. I literally have a book-buying problem, according to my husband. (I, however, rationalize it by buying 99% of them at garage sales and resales for much less than a dollar in near perfect condition).
Which is why, most of the time, I throw a book in with a shower gift. Books are great gifts. The point is not the book, the point is being told what to buy. Diaper raffles, wishing wells, etc are not cool. I also, ftr, didn't have my registry (which, ironically, had books on it) on my shower invites.
He's the single greatest thing I've done in my life and reminds me daily of how fun (and funny) life can be. He's turned out pretty swell for having such a heartless and evil mother.
How about instead of asking for books in lieu of card why not have an activity at the shower where guests can write down the name and a brief description of their favorite children's book(s)? That way you don't end up with duplicate copies that have all been written in and you can learn of books that you might have never heard of before. It also doesn't cost the guest any additional money.
Oh, look, here comes the cynic who will find something wrong with anything anybody does! If you think you're being forced to do or bring something to a shower or party for a friend or loved one, politely decline! No one is twisting your arm.
I didn't say I was a teacher, I'm an educator.
Literacy is not something "touted" about, it's a serious problem. Studies have shown that:
Providing books to children is a simple, effective, and inexpensive way to promote language and literacy growth. Owning books is a critical feature of every child's intellectual development. Reading aloud to children is the single most effective parent practice for enhancing language and literacy development. Children with books at home are eight times more likely to list reading as one of their favorite activities.That said, I know the thread was about asking for books at a shower. Bottomline, if you find it tacky, then don't follow suit.
The book thing doesn't so much bother me, if I spent more on a really nice book I would spend less on a gift though...
But I was recently invited to a shower and on the invite it said "please refrain from buying anything patterned in sports, cars, dinosaurs, or animals."
I mean I get that it is your 3rd little boy and all and you are tired of little boy stuff but really.....
Come on Ballsox, you know you want every child except yours to be illiterate, that way Little Sox can run the world!
Shut the front door. Don't let people in on my plan! Btw, Little Sox is way less funny than "Baby Balls" which is what BOTB called him for awhile. :P
He's the single greatest thing I've done in my life and reminds me daily of how fun (and funny) life can be. He's turned out pretty swell for having such a heartless and evil mother.
Baby Balls for President!!!!!
Since the point of a shower is to give gifts I think it'd be a bit ridiculous not to include registry info if the guest of honor has registered somewhere. It just makes it that much more inconvenient for the invitee to now have to hunt down registry info. A wedding is different because the purpose of a wedding is not to give gifts.
This, I have been to a few showers that did this and everyone loved it and thought it was such a wonderful way to start baby's library and share some of their fav childhood stories.