SO's parents... vent kind of long.

LIvie Dean

I feel like they could care less about the LO coming and them being grandparents for the first time. His family is a lot different then mine, his parents NEVER kiss or say I love you and they just don't show compassion for each other like my family does. His mom has foot problems right now and recently found out she has sharkos(sp), so she's having to wear a boot and get surgery on it. She goes to his sister's house which is an hour away and stays there every weekend. His dad works ALL the time and is hardly ever home. His mom told me that her best friend is coming to visit her and his sister the weekend that the baby is due. She has to go three hours away and pick her up and take her to his sisters house. When she said that it kinda hurt my feelings like she didn't really care, she just wanted to spend time with her best friend. And I know that the baby might not even be here by then or might be here earlier but still. 

And then the other day, after my shower, my mom and youngeszt sister came by to drop off the presents since they wouldn't fit in our car. My mom was talking to SO's dad and asked him if he was excited to be a grandpa. He said he guessed, and that he hasn't even told anyone at his work. I have three weeks left, and he hasn't told anyone at his work?! My parents are so excited and have told everyone they know that they are going to be grandparents. I guess I just thought that SO's parents would be happy too. It makes me really upset that they're like that. 

Idk maybe i'm putting to much in to it, and they'll change once he's born. I hope! I just had to vent to someone. Thanks for listening.

m231

Bummer.  I'm sorry you are going through this!  I hope they changed their feelings when he is born.  Good luck.

NoodleM

You can't make someone care or feel compassion unless it is in them to do so.

I have a family kind of like you described, no one hugs or kisses at all. I brought it up one time at a family dinner and my grandma even said 'You are right, and I think about how my children would have turned out if I had hugged them' Of course that got my aunts and my mom all going and fighting, haha.

I don't even hug my mom. It's just the way we are. They aren't bad people, it's just how they were raised. I didn't even hug my mom the last time I saw her before we moved away from home, my husband doesn't get it because that's not how his family is.

Don't feel hurt, it's just the way they are. It's nothing personal on you I'm sure.

sportsmomma

My ILs have been the same way, but not as extreme.

I had been so upset about it (along with the fact that they ALWAYS talk about their niece they see once a year, if that, who already has a baby and every detail about her pregnancy and don't care about mine) that DH said something. I'm not sure exactly what he said because I wasn't there, but I'm sure he wasn't rude and I got the impression he just told them, after they'd brought up the niece again, that we were having a baby too, it's our first and their grandbaby. I think they've  been better since then. So I TRY to give them benefit of the doubt that they just didn't realize it bothered us.

Also, my MIL mentioned offhand one day after I'd said a few things about my parents being so excited they have even turned a room in their house into a nursery (not to make her feel bad, we were just talking about my parents) that she has a hard time getting excited for things before they are here. She said she's excited for the baby, but until the baby is actually here it's hard for her to show it. I appreciated her honesty. So who knows, maybe you have some of the same deal?

It still hurts my feelings when they are more interested in the DIY Network than hearing about an ultrasound or whatever, but oh well, I figure my family is excited enough for everyone! 

stephers_7

I'd be bummed too! I come from a very affectionate family that is very close. My husbands family is close too but they aren't as affectionate and it bugs me. My side of the family acutally shows when they are excited about something unlike his.... 

My in laws are showing their excitment most of the time but I get what you're going through.