S/O. Can you offer input about "our story"?

MummyGruetzie

The post below made me go back to iphoto and mull over our DDs adoption story again. I've been working on it for a few months now. All of the pages are written (minus a few photos that need to be added), but I'm still not feeling 100% confident. I'm not sure if that's because there's really something wrong with it or just because its something so absolutely dear to my heart that I want it to be absolutely perfect. 

Please share your thoughts! . . . As a backstory: We adopted through fta and have never met DDs birthmother, though we somewhat know her story. DD is very medically fragile and has multiple special needs. Her sister, our bio daughter, is the same age and we wanted this to be something we could read to them both together. Also, DD came to each visitation with bruises and was clearly not being taken care of while in FC (the doctors believe this caused some of her SN) and has some pretty severe attachment issues that come and go. We wanted to acknowledge her physical and mental pains in the book, but also keep things on a mostly happy note. I also had trouble figuring out deciding whether to refer to her as her birth-name or her forever name/when to change it in the book and how to refer to her sister before they meet in the story (ie. "your sister" doesn't feel right) . . Feel free to offer any input!

Its in iphoto and has a layout where there's one large photo per page. I'm going to braille it for her and I'm contemplating how I can add some tactile/sensory pieces into it as well. My plan was to have it done for her finalization, but now I'm thinking Christmas.

Our's goes like this so far....

(cover) L's story.

 

Once upon a time, there was a precious little girl who was looking for a family to love her. Her name was (full birth-name).

 And there was a family with a Mom and a Dad and a ("sister" or "sister's name"?), but something was missing. And they weren?t quite sure what it was. 

  And then one day the Mommy found out about the little girl who was looking for a family. And she made lots of phone calls to ask if the little girl was okay.

 And she found out that (birth-name) really needed a Forever Family. 

 And the Mommy and the Daddy talked about this. And they wanted to meet (birth-name).  

And so the Mommy, the Daddy, and (sister that is our bio.daughter's name) road in the car for a very long time to go meet (birth-name).  

 And when they met her, they fell in love with her. 

 And their hearts were sad when they had to go back home.

 And they thought about (birth-name) a lot. And prayed to God and asked Him to help keep her safe until they could see her again. 

 And when the Mommy, the Daddy, and (sister) got to see (birth-name) again they were very happy. And it made them smile a lot.  

And again their hearts were sad when they had to go back home. And they cried.

And they asked God to help (birth-name) be part of their family forever.  

And He listened to their prayer. And (birth-name) got to come home. 

And (not sure what to call us at this point?) loved her so so so much. 

And (sister) and (birth-name) did lots of things together. 

They went on walks. And they played games.  

And (birth-name) liked having a forever family.  

But sometimes she was sad. 

And sometimes she felt ouchy and sick. And she went to the doctor a lot.

And the Mommy and the Daddy and (sister) asked God to help her feel better.

And sometimes she did feel better.

And sometimes she was very very happy. 

The Mommy and the Daddy loved (birth-name). And so did (sister). And they wanted her to be part of their family forever. So they decided to adopt her.  

And so they did. 

And the family was very happy together. And they smiled a lot.

 

 Thanks again for your insight!

baze2

I am not sure of the age of this daughter. However, she will likely only know you as mom and dad. I wouldn't over think the names that you are calling each other. Your name is mom. Sisters name is _______. Your DH is dad. I think it is a beautiful story. I think both girls will love it.

 

Ambie0611

Awww - Beautiful Story! I agree that both of your girls will love hearing about it!

Art Teacher

I would refer to yourself as Mommy and Daddy throughout the story - that's how she refers to you, so she'll understand who you're talking about.  I would refer to your other daughter as either "sister" or "her name".

It's a great story   I'm sure she'll love reading it with her sister!

Cissi64

 "And there was a family with a Mom and a Dad and a (sister named,XXXX), but something was missing. And they weren?t quite sure what it was." 

 "And Mommy and Daddy loved her so-so much"  You are  her mom and dad now. You covered the FC part already so it would be weird to call yourselves anything else at this point in the story.

I'm confused about L's name.  If  you kept birth First name and just changed middle and last, just refer toher as "L".  If you changed her first name, I would put something along the lines of  "and when "X" became part of the family her new name  was "L"".

kgs0505

You start almost every sentence with the word "And".  I think you can delete most of those.  Other than that, I think it's sweet.

MummyGruetzie

kgs0505:

You start almost every sentence with the word "And".  I think you can delete most of those.  Other than that, I think it's sweet.

I'm so glad you pointed this out! I'll fix those.  

MummyGruetzie

Thank you all so much for your input! To answer PPs question, we did change her first, middle, and last name. I liked your suggestion to specifically add that into the story.

hlsgrad

I think it's a great story. My only comment would be to try to add in up front how much you all needed/wanted her, even though you didn't know it until you met her. It emphasizes that DD needed a family, and you say something was missing in your lives too, but I wouldn't want her to read it later on and get the sense that she wanted/needed you more than you wanted/needed her. I am sure it is 100% fine the way it is, but I am hyper-sensitive to that issue, so I probably am overthinking it.  My goal with my kids - bio and adopted is to have them know from day 1 how much they were wanted so I would take every opportunity i can to emphasize it. Beautiful idea - inspired me to do a story  like that for DD for Christmas

 

onedaychristinak

What a wonderful idea and beautifully written! I think both of them will love to look back at this as they grow.